I thought of that too. I have enough video just from the last 2 weekends to pay for the summer tournaments. But he is selective on which videos he posts.
Parents from certain teams
- Thread starter 46n2
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foreveryoung
SILVER ELITE
The yelling and constant questioning of the referees is completely out of control. I can't believe how much it is allowed to go on. At kids sporting events, it should not be allowed at all. Parents act like it's the world cup final when it's just another kid soccer game. One of the sidelines this past weekend was especially horrific. Not only were they screaming about the refereeing constantly but they were also criticizing the kids. And they were winning! It was so awful I seriously questioned why I am allowing my kid to be a part of this environment at all.
E- You are always half empty . . . explains a lot, especially your politics.
MijoPlumber
SILVER
Some of those refs need to be told they are wrong and they need to stop listening to the parents on the other team before they make their calls. I agree it is getting worse. Especially those refs in Norco and Temecula.
Definitelynotanotherref
SILVER ELITE
Damn, we almost got away with ignoring another troll espola comment, but we had to acknowledge his existence lol.
Definitelynotanotherref
SILVER ELITE
I will be the first to admit that there are some refs that don't do themselves any favors. But taking it upon yourself to attempt to publically humiliate another human being does absolutely nothing positive.
1: It teaches your kids a lack of respect for authority. You think your kids will always have great bosses? Why don't you just teach your kid "If you have a bad boss, fuck him, and tell it to his face". It does not matter if authority is wielding its power ineffectively, Authority is authority, and you will not get far in life if you throw a temper tantrum everytime you think you could have done something better than your boss.
2: It teaches your children to "tilt" when faced with adversity. Harassing the referee just takes your kids focus off soccer. Instead of trying to win, some kids become more obsessed with counting how many fouls the ref calls against them. I see it all the time. You think they can mentally stew on referees mistakes and then be able to track the man he is supposed to be marking from his peripheral vision while making a heads up counterattack? No.
3: The bad referee is just going to view himself as a martyr and become further set in his ways. If a referee is ever going to be told he did a bad job, it will most likely be by one of his peers and it most certainly will not be said in public. The last person a referee will ever have an "aha" moment from is a pissed off parent.
4: It detracts from being able to enjoy potentially good game. Self explanatory.
5: It makes you look like a child. No seriously. Search "bad referee" or any other derivation in YouTube and find me a video where the parents comes off as looking better than the referee. There isn't one. Even when the referee completely missed an obvious call, somehow the parents always look like more of a whiny ass.
I have never seen a referee make a call just because the other teams asks for it. It may seem that way because 1: there is actually a literal amount of time it takes to physically bring the whistle to the mouth (jesus parents). 2: Referees are waiting for advantage 3. The referee has no clue what happened and is looking for clues and is replaying the play in his head 4. He is human and is trying to remember which way red is attacking this half.
Calm down, cheer or shut up, and watch the game.
I was going to print this out and hand it to a few parents I know on the sidelines but then I thought twice due to the language you use in #1. Do you think you can republish a PG version?
Definitelynotanotherref
SILVER ELITE
I will be the first to admit that there are some refs that don't do themselves any favors. But taking it upon yourself to attempt to publically humiliate another human being does absolutely nothing positive.
1: It teaches your kids a lack of respect for authority. You think your kids will always have great bosses? Why don't you just teach your kid "If you have a bad boss, screw him, and tell it to his face". It does not matter if authority is wielding its power ineffectively, Authority is authority, and you will not get far in life if you throw a temper tantrum everytime you think you could have done something better than your boss.
2: It teaches your children to "tilt" when faced with adversity. Harassing the referee just takes your kids focus off soccer. Instead of trying to win, some kids become more obsessed with counting how many fouls the ref calls against them. I see it all the time. You think they can mentally stew on referees mistakes and then be able to track the man he is supposed to be marking from his peripheral vision while making a heads up counterattack? No.
3: The bad referee is just going to view himself as a martyr and become further set in his ways. If a referee is ever going to be told he did a bad job, it will most likely be by one of his peers and it most certainly will not be said in public. The last person a referee will ever have an "aha" moment from is a pissed off parent.
4: It detracts from being able to enjoy potentially good game. Self explanatory.
5: It makes you look like a child. No seriously. Search "bad referee" or any other derivation in YouTube and find me a video where the parents comes off as looking better than the referee. There isn't one. Even when the referee completely missed an obvious call, somehow the parents always look like more awful and whiny.
I have never seen a referee make a call just because the other teams asks for it. It may seem that way because 1: there is actually a literal amount of time it takes to physically bring the whistle to the mouth (jesus parents). 2: Referees are waiting for advantage 3. The referee has no clue what happened and is looking for clues and is replaying the play in his head 4. He is human and is trying to remember which way red is attacking this half.
Calm down, cheer or shut up, and watch the game.
OrangeCountyDad
SILVER ELITE
if you want to see bad behavior, go to the HB Sand Soccer tournament.
Truth!!!! Something about the sand and the sun makes people lose it a little faster.
MijoPlumber
SILVER
Sure. Why don’t you come down off that cross ref and face reality. Hey it’s rough when your kid’s team plays 11 v. 12 or more. Sucks when the ref clearly favors the other team and is like a 12th player. We all see it and It happens all too often.
Take a deep breadth before you go out on the field and do your job honestly. Not for the parents but for the kids.
Definitelynotanotherref
SILVER ELITE
You clearly missed the point
At no point did I deny it happens, see first sentence. Also, look closer at point #3. Every single argument assumes the ref is bending you over, and yet, each point still maintains you act like an adult despite the tragic affront to human dignity that is a bad referee for 60-90 minutes.
No referee favors a team. They favor a playing style, a physicality style, a coaching style, an attitude. I have reffed the same exact way style-wise in the same day, and have had one game where both teams think I arbitrated with divine inspiration and the other game 1 team thinks I emerged from Satan's crack. I assure you, it is mostly their perception based on their playing style. I tend to only call pulling and pushing when it is significant whereas I call tripping fouls pretty tight. Enter one team that trips to challenge and another team that pulls to challenge and you have a one-sided game foul-count wise. But hey, you can keep doing the same thing and complaining because what is the definition of insanity right?
The wise team/coach/player/parent will adjust to any referee and thereby significantly improve their chances on the margin.
And don't imply that referees ever intend to do their job's dishonestly. The only thing worse than woe is me thinking is conspiracy theorists.
You clearly missed the point
At no point did I deny it happens, see first sentence. Also, look closer at point #3. Every single argument assumes the ref is bending you over, and yet, each point still maintains you act like an adult despite the tragic affront to human dignity that is a bad referee for 60-90 minutes.
No referee favors a team. They favor a playing style, a physicality style, a coaching style, an attitude. I have reffed the same exact way style-wise in the same day, and have had one game where both teams think I arbitrated with divine inspiration and the other game 1 team thinks I emerged from Satan's crack. I assure you, it is mostly their perception based on their playing style. I tend to only call pulling and pushing when it is significant whereas I call tripping fouls pretty tight. Enter one team that trips to challenge and another team that pulls to challenge and you have a one-sided game foul-count wise. But hey, you can keep doing the same thing and complaining because what is the definition of insanity right?
The wise team/coach/player/parent will adjust to any referee and thereby significantly improve their chances on the margin.
And don't imply that referees ever intend to do their job's dishonestly. The only thing worse than woe is me thinking is conspiracy theorists.
I am sure that every game YOU refereed was fair. You are not every referee.
Definitelynotanotherref
SILVER ELITE
All I have done in this thread so far is explain how to behave in the moment you experience what you believe to be a bad or unfair ref. (I have seen refs do a great job but some people still feel he did a terrible job)
If you want to effect change after you experience a bad referee, then follow Abraham Lincolns advice:
"When I so pressingly urge a strict observance of all the laws, let me not be understood as saying there are no bad laws, nor that grievances may not arise...--I mean to say no such thing. But I do mean to say, that, although bad laws, if they exist, should be repealed as soon as possible, still while they continue in force, for the sake of example, they should be religiously observed...If such arise, let proper legal provisions be made for them with the least possible delay; but, till then, let them, if not too intolerable, be borne with.
There is no grievance that is a fit object of redress by mob law (parent yelling). In any case that arises, as for instance, the promulgation of abolitionism, one of two positions is necessarily true; that is, the thing is right within itself, and therefore deserves the protection of all law and all good citizens; or, it is wrong, and therefore proper to be prohibited by legal enactments; and in neither case, is the interposition of mob law, either necessary, justifiable, or excusable."
That is from his Lyceum Speech. Possibly the greatest speech written in human history.
And if you are skeptical about the formal/informal review process that referees go through, I have a different take than bald and surf ref about how effective those are.
I have had formal and informal discussions with referees myself. How many times have you heard one say that he is totally fair and does the best job he can, but "That guy I worked with last month..."?
Definitelynotanotherref
SILVER ELITE
I've addressed referees, but for bad coaches. I've always thought in team games that a poor decision done as a team are almost always better than a good decision that not everyone is on the same page on. Parents trying to out-coach the coach usually end up doing more harm than good from a trying to win perspective.
Your American freedom allows you to find a new coach/team, and it also gives you the freedom to sabotage and undermine your own coach. But that is none of my business. As far as criticizing the president, we can do that, but we aren't sending additional orders to our troops that may confuse them. That's what you do when you try to coach the kids with your proximity. If you did the same thing to the troops as you do to your kids, that is at worst treason, and at best interfering, so still illegal.
Criticize the coach after the game, not during it. Criticize the president after his decisions, meanwhile you carry them out in the moment.
Definitelynotanotherref
SILVER ELITE
I would say that "the one ref last month was bad", not unfair. And I have reffed with a guy that showed up to his game 10 minutes before with alcohol on his breath (adult game though). The players definitely noticed it, but I thought the way he reffed that day was actually an improvement on his usual performance.
The formal/informal process is all the refs generally know how each of their peers are as a ref. The consistently bad ones are recognized as such and are assigned to the lower level games. My apologies to the teams that have to experience them, but if we had more refs we could replace the bad refs instead of just shunt them sideways.
If a parent goes to the referee tent and tells the assignor "That referee could not manage/handle/control that game" and that is all they say. Do it. An individual complaint might not do much, but if an assignor is consistently getting complaints aabout the same ref from different people, it will definitely effect his perception from his assignor. And that is kind of the last thing we want as a referee.
outside!
DA
SD County seems to have a surplus of youth referees. My son has not been able to get any games assigned to him this summer.
baldref
GOLD
That shouldn’t be. If he wants to work and wants to learn, he needs games. There are several assignors that you should email directly and they will make sure he gets to work and learn.