Discussion in 'SoCalScene' started by 46n2, May 29, 2018.
After this weekend , I was disgusted at how some parents act.
IS THIS REAL LIFE?
Have you been living under a rock?
But yes it is very sad.
It really is out of control.
Parents say things among themselves that they think nobody else can hear.
Parents yell stuff at their own kid and their kid yells back "Mom. Shut up."
Parents that have no clue on the laws of the game chirping stuff at referees.
However - the worst are Grand Parents. Wow.
This is why I go to an area away from the sidelines. Often behind the net when its allowed or possible. Or off in the corner. I have even from time to time put my wireless earbuds in and listen to music.
Not under a rock forsure , but after this weekend, wowza!! Im just laughing to myself about these people!!
I wont say what tournament, doesnt make a difference . I dont blast people or teams (as much as I want too) I just like to bring up topics.
Ive been in this game for a long long time.......
I will say the guy was wearing a Gilligan style hat, didnt have the clue about the game, probably drives a expensive electric car and probably from deep south OC / San Diego area...
A couple of years ago a grandparent and an uncle decided to sit on our side of the field at a fall showcase game. In most cases individuals who do are polite and quiet in my experience. This individual was a heckler and was cheering for his granddaughter continuously through the first half. We politely asked the ref if he could ask this person to move. When the ref asked they refused. We then politely asked the pair to move to their side. Again refusing with some words not necessary to share. Needless to say they were jerks and this turned south fast. It was then the ref crew stepped in and removed the pair.
There is some hope, in my experience the older the kids get the mellower the parents get. There will always be a few but but at u17-19 the number of crazies gets substantially less, especially for league games and non-consequential tournaments in May.
A few years ago at one of my older boy's last tournaments I walked around to see some u-littles play and while the soccer was fun to watch I was horrified at the sidelines. Had totally forgotten what u10 sidelines were like. Little tiny field packed from end to end with parents, grand parents, siblings and everyone yelling at the players and referees.
I think we need to sit parents on the same side as their teams. Coaches can’t control the insanity from across the field with both teams being next to each other.
And it also separates the crazy parents from each other.
Thankfully by the time they are attending U16 games, parents have mellowed and are less "colorful" to say the least.
The natural selection has taken place as well as the realization that their kid simply is not the prodigy that they thought they had.....
I believe is we sat them about 25 ft away, that would work too.
I think at u12 and below this should be the case. However most coaches don't want to control the insanity and having parents on the other side of the field makes it easier to abdicate the responsibility.
Funny how you started this thread. Over the weekend I saw after a goal scored a parent running down the entire length of the side line high-fiving everyone................wearing a Justin Timberlake shirt. Can't make this stuff up!
Finding a balance is something to aim for......
After big tournament weekends...the I hate this or that..... threads tend to pop up
Spending 3 days at a youth soccer tournament is really not "fun" for most adults so balancing that with activities (Surfing, Biking, visiting friends, socializing, drinking, etc) that you enjoy has been key for us.
Going to a new restaurant, pub or place to relax, seeing a concert, movie or something along those lines help. Taking a day off or attending part of a 3 day is something else that can help adults, they catch that "soccer watching burnout fever" and stay things uncalled for.
What that said IMO the whole tournament scene is unhealthy for the kids in reality, too many games in too short of time frames. All in the name of $ and profits I guess but has to be a better way.
When your on the 5,6th game of the 3 day your kid can look like a zombie trust me on this one, fun to win, get the big cup, metals, champions shirts, but as your walking out still question if it was worth all the time and $
My favorite is when they say “it is a free country and I can sit where I want.”
Btw something happened at the Polo Fields this weekend with 3 police cars blocking one of the field exits. It might be what 46n2 is talking about as I heard some rumblings that I can’t confirm. I hope everything turned out to be ok.
I agree, I LOVE SOCCER, from my country thats all we play, along with bball and waterpolo. its a passion ...
I love tournaments too but my older plays one a day, where my younger plays two a day , two to three days in a row.
I have to agree, after a certain age when kids start to put things together in their head and on the fields, start playing with skill, its tough to deal with fatigue, let along some parent yelling at you because you "body too hard against their lil jimmy/susy"
Or better yet, the gilligan hat guy , total double standard with his train of thought.
FYI I was all over the place this weekend, didnt see anything where cops were involved,hope everyone was safe.
On another topic, I watched a u9 game that was so much fun, and competitive (believe it or not) , parents were well behave'd and thats what soccer is about ....
I think the really tough years are U12- U13, that's the year where parents really get a chip on their shoulder.
I think that most parents go into games with good intentions.
But then their kid gets roughed up a bit and it all goes to hell.
Or they overhear a parent from another team say something slightly disparaging about a kid.
"Push her BACK!!!!!." "Don't let her push you." "Honey, dont you dare push my kid again" (I've heard all of these several times this Spring - Girls u14 games).
Overheard this weekend by 3 dads who wanted to show off their football throwing skills for everyone during halftime:
"I heard this team we are playing brought players from their higher team for this game." (Reality was it was a holiday weekend and guests were invited because a few kids weren't planning to be back in time. They wound up showing up and we had more on our bench than we had planned). Didn't matter -we lost anyway.
"Geez. That's so weak. Too bad we are going to crush them anyway." (then he repeated it at least 3 times to make sure that everyone could hear him).
Took a lot for me to keep quiet, because even the slightest response would have wound up being an issue.
The simplest thing that I thought to say was "We? You guys should probably stick to throwing the football around and let the 11 year old girls play the game."
I believe Dads are worst at DD games , and Moms are worst at BB games......
My partner , sits at the very end of the field away from the action, never says anything .
I hear other parents telling their kids to tackle or take out other kids, then you hear that parent complain about their DD/BB getting bodied, Karma?
Soccer is a very physical , demanding sport, when a smart player is on the field and can play with both skill and brawn, its a beautiful thing.
I was very impressed with a few kids this weekend that played composed, physically demanding soccer, both girls and boys around the 10-12 age!
Multiple fights at Silverlakes during Legends tournament. Grown men fighting at a soccer tournament. And its not surprising....