baldref
GOLD
If you’re not a distraction in any way, I’m ok with it.
Parents from certain teams
- Thread starter 46n2
- Start date
I haven't noticed too much flopping over the year. There are some kids that just go down easier than others but every once in a while, you find one that you just have to giggle at.
I didn't catch all of it so you really had to be there but whenever someone mentions flopping I think of this:
Kid got a couple good rolls in the end and was upset the play continued
This thread has branched in so many directions its almost comical.
I typically film our games (more for the parents than the kids). Occasionally I have to set up between the benches depending on the suns position. I've never had anyone complain but I make it a point to greet the coach on the other team and if he(she) asks, I offer up a link to the game when I'm done.
If shes able to make it, my wife will take pictures from the sidelines including from behind the net. She doesn't "set up" and doesn't stay too long in one place. I don't recall her ever being asked to move by a ref.
We did have a keeper coach get asked to move during a single ref scrimmage. I did find that a bit odd as the point of a scrimmage is to practice and learn but I do get it.
I guess my question should be more specific as I think all reasonable people agree that respectful people are not the issue.
But when derogatory remarks are made when sitting on the other sides half and the team manager gets the offenders manager what is the correct response?
1. You can stay here if you keep quiet.(yes a manger recently said this after the derogatory remarks were made).
2. You can stay here as long as your derogatory remarks are not directly to the other team’s parents (yes I have had an AR tell me this when asked to remove a known bad parent before the game started).
3. Just move on the other side of the corner flag and you can do what you want including coaching (yes a manager said this).
4. Yelling cross, watch #14, pass it to x, watch offsides, push up etc is not coaching and therefore is allowed. ( parents and managers said this was ok because everyone does it).
But when derogatory remarks are made when sitting on the other sides half and the team manager gets the offenders manager what is the correct response?
1. You can stay here if you keep quiet.(yes a manger recently said this after the derogatory remarks were made).
2. You can stay here as long as your derogatory remarks are not directly to the other team’s parents (yes I have had an AR tell me this when asked to remove a known bad parent before the game started).
3. Just move on the other side of the corner flag and you can do what you want including coaching (yes a manager said this).
4. Yelling cross, watch #14, pass it to x, watch offsides, push up etc is not coaching and therefore is allowed. ( parents and managers said this was ok because everyone does it).
Ty
Typically it’s not. But it’s where you position yourself and if you remain quiet. It also depends upon the facility. Silver Lakes, Galway Downs, So Cal Complex are very good locations to sit behind the nets as those are used for foot traffic. Therfore you do go unnoticed. I also sit about 15 yards off the end line at an angle near the corner post.
I film all of our games , Ive done hundreds of them. I have filmed on coaches sides and parents sides. Personally I prefer coaches sides because parents are out of control.
The losing parents (about 70% of the time) are louder and more vocal .
The winning parents (about 20% of the time) are obnoxious sometimes. Maybe their just overly excited , lets call it that.
Ive never have had a ref ask me to move, and I always ask coaches if I can be on their side due to sun facing camera.....no one has ever said no, but then again Im filming and Im quiet (80% of the time
)
I film other games when people ask.....hit me up if you need a game (my plug) as a hobby and see all types of parents in the OC/LA area and no matter what city, what club, etc......... We are all a bit loud,
and when you hear yourself on the video, that tends to cure the loud parents because they get embarrassed because the camera picks up everything....
I personally delete the negative from my games , because I dont want my son reliving negative situations like parents fighting, coaches cursing, etc......red cards stay but if its a fight or something not suitable for a 10 yr old its gone.....
Its common courtesy really, Ive seen people get upset because the ref asked them to move back from the sideline, or because other parents asked them to sit on their own team side....
I believe that if you come into the situation already gunning for a fight its ugly from the start ,.... but if a parent just kindly ask me to move, and Im in their space or side, 100% Im gonna move because its their team side and Im not on that team.....period.
There are some unruly parents, but the ratio is small, alot of us know the game and really look forward to watching our kids play a beautiful sport!! Dont let some bad apples ruin your Saturday.........
The losing parents (about 70% of the time) are louder and more vocal .
The winning parents (about 20% of the time) are obnoxious sometimes. Maybe their just overly excited , lets call it that.
Ive never have had a ref ask me to move, and I always ask coaches if I can be on their side due to sun facing camera.....no one has ever said no, but then again Im filming and Im quiet (80% of the time
)I film other games when people ask.....hit me up if you need a game (my plug) as a hobby and see all types of parents in the OC/LA area and no matter what city, what club, etc......... We are all a bit loud,
and when you hear yourself on the video, that tends to cure the loud parents because they get embarrassed because the camera picks up everything....
I personally delete the negative from my games , because I dont want my son reliving negative situations like parents fighting, coaches cursing, etc......red cards stay but if its a fight or something not suitable for a 10 yr old its gone.....
Its common courtesy really, Ive seen people get upset because the ref asked them to move back from the sideline, or because other parents asked them to sit on their own team side....
I believe that if you come into the situation already gunning for a fight its ugly from the start ,.... but if a parent just kindly ask me to move, and Im in their space or side, 100% Im gonna move because its their team side and Im not on that team.....period.
There are some unruly parents, but the ratio is small, alot of us know the game and really look forward to watching our kids play a beautiful sport!! Dont let some bad apples ruin your Saturday.........
Surfref
PREMIER
Unless the gaming rules say otherwise, I don't care if you sit behind the goal line as long as you are at least a reasonable distance (10 yards) back. Now, if someone behind the goal is annoying or coaching the keeper then I will move them. Most big tournaments have a steady stream of people walking behind the goal line, teams warming up and spectators watching the game. It is normally not a big deal.
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/07/18/sports/referee-parents-abuse-videos.html
Great article about a ref shaming bad parents.
Great article about a ref shaming bad parents.
younothat
PREMIER
$100 reward for videos of parents behaving poorly towards refs at youth soccer games. Wonder if he might run out of $$ soon since this has gone mainstream.
Most of the videos are about how great he is for doing this; very little action.
Surfref
PREMIER
I am in complete support of what this guy is doing with his Facebook page. Cal South and all clubs have a coach and parent code of conduct that is rarely followed. If clubs would hold the few unruly parents accountable for their inappropriate behavior, we would not have parents yelling at the referees. The even fewer coaches, that most referees know, that yell non-stop at the referees should be sanctioned by their clubs. I was glad to hear at a referee training session a couple months ago that Cal South does not want us to put up with any of the inappropriate comments and deal with the coaches and parents early. I had a coach this past weekend that was a complete douche bag and had to go through the Ask and Tell process before he would shut up. The Tell consisted of me saying, "Please coach, I do not want to hear any comments about the referee crews performance. The last thing I want to do is throw you out of the game and end the game. The only ones that would hurt are your players that are working hard to maintain their one goal lead." I think what made it sink in for the coach was one of his players (U14 girl) said, "If he throws you out do we lose even though we are winning?"
Parents and coaches just need to do their job, Parents cheer and coaches coach.
I thought of that too. I have enough video just from the last 2 weekends to pay for the summer tournaments. But he is selective on which videos he posts.
foreveryoung
SILVER ELITE
The yelling and constant questioning of the referees is completely out of control. I can't believe how much it is allowed to go on. At kids sporting events, it should not be allowed at all. Parents act like it's the world cup final when it's just another kid soccer game. One of the sidelines this past weekend was especially horrific. Not only were they screaming about the refereeing constantly but they were also criticizing the kids. And they were winning! It was so awful I seriously questioned why I am allowing my kid to be a part of this environment at all.
E- You are always half empty . . . explains a lot, especially your politics.
MijoPlumber
SILVER
Some of those refs need to be told they are wrong and they need to stop listening to the parents on the other team before they make their calls. I agree it is getting worse. Especially those refs in Norco and Temecula.
Definitelynotanotherref
SILVER ELITE
Damn, we almost got away with ignoring another troll espola comment, but we had to acknowledge his existence lol.
Definitelynotanotherref
SILVER ELITE
I will be the first to admit that there are some refs that don't do themselves any favors. But taking it upon yourself to attempt to publically humiliate another human being does absolutely nothing positive.
1: It teaches your kids a lack of respect for authority. You think your kids will always have great bosses? Why don't you just teach your kid "If you have a bad boss, fuck him, and tell it to his face". It does not matter if authority is wielding its power ineffectively, Authority is authority, and you will not get far in life if you throw a temper tantrum everytime you think you could have done something better than your boss.
2: It teaches your children to "tilt" when faced with adversity. Harassing the referee just takes your kids focus off soccer. Instead of trying to win, some kids become more obsessed with counting how many fouls the ref calls against them. I see it all the time. You think they can mentally stew on referees mistakes and then be able to track the man he is supposed to be marking from his peripheral vision while making a heads up counterattack? No.
3: The bad referee is just going to view himself as a martyr and become further set in his ways. If a referee is ever going to be told he did a bad job, it will most likely be by one of his peers and it most certainly will not be said in public. The last person a referee will ever have an "aha" moment from is a pissed off parent.
4: It detracts from being able to enjoy potentially good game. Self explanatory.
5: It makes you look like a child. No seriously. Search "bad referee" or any other derivation in YouTube and find me a video where the parents comes off as looking better than the referee. There isn't one. Even when the referee completely missed an obvious call, somehow the parents always look like more of a whiny ass.
I have never seen a referee make a call just because the other teams asks for it. It may seem that way because 1: there is actually a literal amount of time it takes to physically bring the whistle to the mouth (jesus parents). 2: Referees are waiting for advantage 3. The referee has no clue what happened and is looking for clues and is replaying the play in his head 4. He is human and is trying to remember which way red is attacking this half.
Calm down, cheer or shut up, and watch the game.
I was going to print this out and hand it to a few parents I know on the sidelines but then I thought twice due to the language you use in #1. Do you think you can republish a PG version?
