Girls Soccer culture--Bulling Pandemic of Negative On-Field Comments & Clique:
My daughter tried out and joined a new club around 3 years ago. From day one of joining the new club--she has never been welcomed by multiple teammates on her side. These teammates previously made up the core of a prior team that broke away and joined the new club/team. These girls all go to the same high school--my kid, thank God, does not attend their school. When my kid plays during games--some of these girls yell at her if she makes a mistake on the pitch...you are offsides, she falls or gets injured--Get up type comments. This is some real nasty stuff. She is shunned in practice. Girls roll eyes at her. The problem is that the kids doing this are often wrong--the offsides was not offsides, or the offsides occurred because X player took 3 dribbles to get the ball off her foot when the run was being made...when it should have been 1 touch into space...on, and on, and on. And of course, none of any of the other girls make mistakes...never. My kid does her best to brush this off and has had several telephone and phase to phase calls with some of these girls about this...this has helped, but it does not solve the problem. She has talked to the coach--the coach sees entitled girls, and has made attempts to put some of this down, but it still goes on. My daughter has chosen to stick it out--at least for now, as she ignores these girls and does not want to let their actions and immaturity impact her--she sees her time on this side as temporary... Unfortunately, multiple girls have left the club and the team has such a bad reputation that other girls within a distance do not want anything to even do with the club--so we are losing out on potentially great players trying out for our side. My kid has experienced none of this on her U17 National Team side...a total night and day experience in camp and on the pitch. My kid practices with the boys side--the boys accept her as an equal--boys are positive...they play hard and they bang, but they have no hang-ups...
My sense is that we have a Pandemic on the Girls Side of bullying...Here are some line-item ideas/random thoughts:
--Is Soccer Culture Just a Mess--the term giving the "stick" exists in Soccer. This does not exist in any other men's sport that I am aware of...negativity is that--negativity. Whereas being positive during play, leads often to more good plays... Why is this? Too many low quality people in soccer? Where does this culture come from? Maybe I am just unaware, but do Girls Bully each other in all other sports?
--Mean girls and their cliques...insecure, anxious, trying to hold onto their playing position thru social pressure versus actually competing...
--Coach/Club permitting this garbage--If it is accepted = it is coached.
--Dumbass parents creating entitled children, and not knowing what sportsmanship is. Parents on the side-lines can, surely, hear this banter and should be correcting their kids before or after games-are they actually that dumb to see how poorly this shows on their kid (how about college coaches hearing this garbage--how does the kid look as a scout;
--Leagues being poorly run and not being in front of this...Negativity needs to be taken out of them game. US Soccer and the Leagues do nothing about this...there should be videos and parent, coach and club training about this.
I grew-up playing multiple sports, but not soccer. I have never have experienced this in any other sport.
I think the solution is Better Parenting and Awareness by Parents, Coaches, Players and Clubs....it is such a shame that things are often this way, when they can be so much better.
My daughter tried out and joined a new club around 3 years ago. From day one of joining the new club--she has never been welcomed by multiple teammates on her side. These teammates previously made up the core of a prior team that broke away and joined the new club/team. These girls all go to the same high school--my kid, thank God, does not attend their school. When my kid plays during games--some of these girls yell at her if she makes a mistake on the pitch...you are offsides, she falls or gets injured--Get up type comments. This is some real nasty stuff. She is shunned in practice. Girls roll eyes at her. The problem is that the kids doing this are often wrong--the offsides was not offsides, or the offsides occurred because X player took 3 dribbles to get the ball off her foot when the run was being made...when it should have been 1 touch into space...on, and on, and on. And of course, none of any of the other girls make mistakes...never. My kid does her best to brush this off and has had several telephone and phase to phase calls with some of these girls about this...this has helped, but it does not solve the problem. She has talked to the coach--the coach sees entitled girls, and has made attempts to put some of this down, but it still goes on. My daughter has chosen to stick it out--at least for now, as she ignores these girls and does not want to let their actions and immaturity impact her--she sees her time on this side as temporary... Unfortunately, multiple girls have left the club and the team has such a bad reputation that other girls within a distance do not want anything to even do with the club--so we are losing out on potentially great players trying out for our side. My kid has experienced none of this on her U17 National Team side...a total night and day experience in camp and on the pitch. My kid practices with the boys side--the boys accept her as an equal--boys are positive...they play hard and they bang, but they have no hang-ups...
My sense is that we have a Pandemic on the Girls Side of bullying...Here are some line-item ideas/random thoughts:
--Is Soccer Culture Just a Mess--the term giving the "stick" exists in Soccer. This does not exist in any other men's sport that I am aware of...negativity is that--negativity. Whereas being positive during play, leads often to more good plays... Why is this? Too many low quality people in soccer? Where does this culture come from? Maybe I am just unaware, but do Girls Bully each other in all other sports?
--Mean girls and their cliques...insecure, anxious, trying to hold onto their playing position thru social pressure versus actually competing...
--Coach/Club permitting this garbage--If it is accepted = it is coached.
--Dumbass parents creating entitled children, and not knowing what sportsmanship is. Parents on the side-lines can, surely, hear this banter and should be correcting their kids before or after games-are they actually that dumb to see how poorly this shows on their kid (how about college coaches hearing this garbage--how does the kid look as a scout;
--Leagues being poorly run and not being in front of this...Negativity needs to be taken out of them game. US Soccer and the Leagues do nothing about this...there should be videos and parent, coach and club training about this.
I grew-up playing multiple sports, but not soccer. I have never have experienced this in any other sport.
I think the solution is Better Parenting and Awareness by Parents, Coaches, Players and Clubs....it is such a shame that things are often this way, when they can be so much better.
