outside!
DA
Surf
ECNL vs. DA turf war has created a 'toxic environment'
- Thread starter VegasParent
- Start date
The toxic part for my dd was after the National Championship. DA left us all in the dark. First DA said 04/03. Then they said 04 by itself. Then they say latter, "We decided no playoffs for 04s." My kid was pissed. You can't expect a competitor like my kid to shut that off for one year. She played two meaningful games that matter most that year to her, against Legends, who had 3 picks for U14 YNT and Earthquakes who had a few too.........that's what gets my kid going.
One more thing about the coach I'm pissed about. I wish he would have helped my dd prepare for the arrival of the head coach from UCLA who did a surprise visit to our practice. She had her list and needed to cross some out. Instead we were told at the last minute that someone from UCLA was coming tomorrow. I don't know all the ends of out with college recruiting but my dd didn't get the feed back that she was looking for after practice. All they got from coach was that some of you lost your chance at UCLA.....lol. Sometimes you miss that one chance. It wasn't meant to be. Oh well, 8th grader wasn't ready and AC was forced to make decisions quickly. North Carolina already got OM as a very young 7th grader. Thank God NCAA changed the rules. That is the Light that has replaced the darkness in girls recruiting.
Good Point. My daughter has friends who made Girls DA teams and passed it up because she was told she was coming in as a backup. One coach told a player she was making a mistake and she should want to fight for a spot on the starting roster. The player told my daughter she just wants to play and have a shot a college and did not not want to sit on the bench all year.
I get the battle for position mentality but some players are not looking for YNT as they know where they stand in the pecking order at 14, 15, 16 and up. My daughter is the least skilled out of all her friends and no longer plays on the same team as them. But when the play against each other at practice she plays to win and it is good to see.
We have had colleges at a couple of our practices and the coaches don’t say a word to anyone about it. Then again, why would they?
By the way, I wouldn’t set yourself up for the expectation that a College Coach is going to give your DD feedback after watching a team practice, unless they’ve communicated on some level prior to the practice. Even then, it’s not likely to happen.
With the new rules...you won’t hear anything. Yes, I whole heartedly support the new rules and so does my DD. She was already feeling pressure from certain schools and was not ready to make any decisions, hell she doesn’t even know what her academic focus will be so how can you make a proper decision?
Here’s the last thing I’ll say on the subject. This all took place when your dd was like 12? You act like her life depended upon it. The one thing positive I can say about MAP is he let things naturally evolve for his kiddo at this age. There was no buy in to hype.
You on the other hand were sold a bill of goods by Surf. I am not sure if you are more mad at yourself for being fooled, mad at Surf or mad at DA. My suggestion is that if your dd is a good player she will eventually get her shot.
But don’t think DA coaches, players and parents are the only ones with a superiority complex. Your references to everyone on “elite teams” deserve a shot at YNT is demeaning to all the other players that play locally or don’t play club at all due to finances.
You on the other hand were sold a bill of goods by Surf. I am not sure if you are more mad at yourself for being fooled, mad at Surf or mad at DA. My suggestion is that if your dd is a good player she will eventually get her shot.
But don’t think DA coaches, players and parents are the only ones with a superiority complex. Your references to everyone on “elite teams” deserve a shot at YNT is demeaning to all the other players that play locally or don’t play club at all due to finances.
MakeAPlay
DA
They used to give feedback to the coaches about what they saw and what they thought needed to be worked on. They also were pretty clear about who they were there to see and whether they were looking at the player for a scholarship or just a roster spot.
I also agree that the new rules are good. The more information for both parties the better. It will be good for late bloomers and for those that are early bloomers as they will likely be at a more appropriate school and less likely to spend 5 years on the bench.
This was all new to me. My kid wasn't even sure she wanted to go college at that time. It's a lot of pressure and I'm not so sure that was the best situation... I know AC is looking for the best and I'm sure she picked well again for the class of 2022.
I never said Elite Teams. I said Elite Players.......I'm not a good writer and I write with emotion. I'm toxic brah. Yes on all the above. That's why I'm here venting. I'm whining and being a big baby and I know it.
MakeAPlay
DA
I don't know much about their committed players beyond 2020. The 2019 class is the last class that my player will play with. I do know that the staff hits a lot more than they miss when it comes to players and if you create a competitive cauldron the cream will rise to the top.
Your exact words from the other thread
"Everyone who pays taxes and has had kids playing at an elite club level should ALL have EQUAL access to the YNT"
Elite club level, not go form an elite TEAM. Big difference which is the only issue I take with you. I know all the darkness that went on. I too have shame but I just want you to know Fact that my dd reason was for one only. I know now at 12 years old that was too early to chase. Understand the difference between LEVEL and TEAM?
Also Fact, during this toxic time back then all the kids on that team and other Elite Club Teams with elite players on them were asked as 7th graders to make their list of colleges. I was shocked so early. My kid only had one team on it, UCLA FIGHT FIGHT FUGHT!!!! She picked it probably because they are one of the best soccer schools hands down, close to the beach, great location, great tradition, championships, football school, social life and the fact her old man loves the school. She was told 100% you better make the GYNT camp or perform really well when AC sees you to even be considered and invited to her camp. Nothing wrong with trying is there? That's how 2022s were picked.
Trying to think if I knew anything about what college I wanted to attend in 7th grade. Aside from watching football games on TV, that never even crossed my mind when I was 12.
Picking a school that has a major that I want? Hell, I didn’t figure out my major until my junior year of college.
Picking a school that has a major that I want? Hell, I didn’t figure out my major until my junior year of college.
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Sounds like you’ve worked with more Salesman than Coaches. For what it’s worth, I have found that those who say the least can do the most.
Your DD is in a good place now. Hopefully it gets better.
dk_b
GOLD
I agree with this so, so much. When my kid was being recruited, she could have really intelligent conversations with coaches about the game, about her strengths and weaknesses, about tactics. When they asked about school, she sounded like the kid she was. I think the school she chose remains the right school for her and I am grateful for that but I think making that decision later will benefit everyone for soccer and non-soccer reasons. (the day we allowed her to commit was also the day she received her first YNT camp invite. I said to her, "are you sure? You may get more opportunities now" and she was clear: "Yes." And, sure enough, she received a query (through her coach) that was highly detailed from an interesting suitor. She remained steadfast: no regrets)
BTW: I have really enjoyed the history lesson covering the recent SoCal Youth Soccer Years. It is incredible how these decisions impact kids - those with parents in the know and those who are ignorant (when things were shifting in NorCal - around the time that ECNL was being born - those like me with kids at small clubs were really ignorant and it looked like all the Big Clubs (and the parents) were talking about a party that we were not invited to. That remains but I get to experience it with a kid at a Big Club and kids at a small club). My kid has faced a lot of the clubs that your kids play at and it is really interesting for me to read how instead of playing Blues, she might have faced Beach. That her numerous games v Surf had a lot of drama going on in the background. Also funny to think that even if our kids are not the same age, many of us have shared venues and lamented about the disgusting porta potties. (many of you prob were at Surf Cup in 2014 when the parking lot at the Polo Fields turned into a mass of horse crap)
That's the point of a coach popping in, to see how players handle the daily routine. If they aren't working hard at club practice what are they going to do in college. That's also the reason the come to various games unannounced to see how kids are responding to different situations. How do they act when they are up 3 goals, down 3 goals etc.. Our kids were always told play your hardest all the time (including warm ups), you never know who is watching
MakeAPlay
DA
Your coach is a wise one....
MakeAPlay
DA
That was one of the last years that my kid played at Surf Cup! 2015 was her very last.....
Was that in 7th and 8th grade?