Cal Berkeley Coach (women) abusive

[dk_b]

The key word in your post - and the reason you are wrong - is “he”. Men’s and women’s soccer are different things. What you describe is not what happens in women’s soccer in major programs, including at Cal.

a single anecdote may be the exception that proves the rule, esp because your point was presently on the roster, but I do know a former player (graduated several years ago but she’s still in her 20s so not that long) who had committed to play D2, got admitted to Cal, visited the coach (who had no idea who she was), was offered a roster spot and played 2 years before focusing on athletics. But that’s a shot in the dark, like the player who shows up at a random ID camp as a no name who earns a spot. It happens but it is exceptionally rare.

 

[Giesbock]

I will always agree that getting a university or trade education is important. And the overall US college experience is amazing and being on a college team can be a priceless experience. But last I remembered college kids aren't living in luxury condos and athletes are basically doing manual labor for free. What can't a player do a degree online and be paid to play?



If she could not get into those schools because of grades - won't she struggle with the academics? Will she have to do a BS major - something that won't lead to a job after college? If it's because of cost - will the scholarship cover the full tuition and board?

With covid - I am wondering if more and more schools (especially ivies) will drop sports. I'm not talking about football and basketball. But how many people even care about State U womens soccer? Will sports scholarships disappear ?

You’re right...can never be too far of a reach just for sport. Needs to be a solid student or it makes no sense trying to get into an Ivy on basis of soccer.
One thing to verbally commit to play at Stanford or Cal. Another to get past the Admissions Office!

 

[eastbaysoccer]

More athletes describe years of mistreatment by Cal soccer coach

Nearly two dozen current and former Cal women's soccer players have contacted KTVU to share disturbing accounts of verbal abuse, bullying, and mistreatment by their long-time coach. Their stories stretch back more than a decade and they all say they were brushed off when they complained.

www.google.com

Second follow up w cal with more women coming forward. The athletic director better act fast or he will be swept away with Neil too. Cal needs to pick their poison. Litigation from a growing number of cal Alums or litigation from Neil when he’s fired.

 

[outside!]

Is anyone surprised by this?

 

[warrior49]

My daughter back in 2015: "I'm thinking about Cal." Her club coach: "I'd rather you play at a D2 school than have the joy of the game ruined by that A**hole."

 

[MacDre]

Is anyone surprised by this?

I am not sure how I feel about it. Full disclosure, I like Neil and I’d like to think that there’s a high probability that my kid will play for him in the near future. So, I don’t want to be dismissive of what these young ladies have experienced and although I am concerned, I am not yet convinced there is a problem.

From the letters I read, I kind of felt some of the ladies lack grit and wanted to be coddled and have their hands held in a cutthroat competitive environment. Seriously?

Many of the things these ladies are complaining about are present in ALL competitive environments. I remember @MakeAPlay mentioning the hunger games at UCLA and warning about the high transfer rate at FSU. What about the high turnover rates of associates at accounting and law firms? Is it Neil or are these ladies having a hard time accepting the finality of the biggest failure of their lives?

I am a “straight shooter” and that is one of the qualities I like most about Neil. I have no problem with him being direct.

 

[crush]

although I am concerned, I am not yet convinced there is a problem.

From the letters I read, I kind of felt some of the ladies lack grit and wanted to be coddled and have their hands held in a cutthroat competitive environment. Seriously?

Many of the things these ladies are complaining about are present in ALL competitive environments. I remember @MakeAPlay mentioning the hunger games at UCLA and warning about the high transfer rate at FSU. What about the high turnover rates of associates at accounting and law firms? Is it Neil or are these ladies having a hard time accepting the finality of the biggest failure of their lives?

I am a “straight shooter” and that is one of the qualities I like most about Neil. I have no problem with him being direct.

I'm old school bro and shoot straight too. Keep in mind, these were all little girls playing soccer and their sharing their story. Let's give them the benefit of the doubt. We all can and should do better as men. I've made a few mistakes in my life and I can own it.

 

[MacDre]

I'm old school bro and shoot straight too. Keep in mind, these were all little girls playing soccer and their sharing their story. Let's give them the benefit of the doubt. We all can and should do better as men. I've made a few mistakes in my life and I can own it.

View attachment 9707

Nope. Not little girls. We are talking about young ladies. If you were Neil, how would you inform a young lady that you felt that you had been hoodwinked, bamboozled, she sucks, doesn’t have what it takes, and you want your money back so you can find a player that can get the job done?

 

[Giesbock]

@MacDre- thanks for giving a current, personal perspective. Tough situation - always two sides of a story...

 

[baller]

I am not sure how I feel about it. Full disclosure, I like Neil and I’d like to think that there’s a high probability that my kid will play for him in the near future. So, I don’t want to be dismissive of what these young ladies have experienced and although I am concerned, I am not yet convinced there is a problem.

From the letters I read, I kind of felt some of the ladies lack grit and wanted to be coddled and have their hands held in a cutthroat competitive environment. Seriously?

Many of the things these ladies are complaining about are present in ALL competitive environments. I remember @MakeAPlay mentioning the hunger games at UCLA and warning about the high transfer rate at FSU. What about the high turnover rates of associates at accounting and law firms? Is it Neil or are these ladies having a hard time accepting the finality of the biggest failure of their lives?

I am a “straight shooter” and that is one of the qualities I like most about Neil. I have no problem with him being direct.

Perhaps not unlike @MacDre, my experience with Neil has always been positive. I'm sure there were things that could have been handled better/differently (there always are), but trial by media is unfortunate. The fact that Cal, one of the greatest institutions in the world, has stood behind him to date is telling. Maybe that changes. Either way, not sure anybody wins here.

 

[crush]

Nope. Not little girls. We are talking about young ladies. If you were Neil, how would you inform a young lady that you felt that you had been hoodwinked, bamboozled, she sucks, doesn’t have what it takes, and you want your money back so you can find a player that can get the job done?

I'm talking about the system the young ladies were brought up in as young girls. Cal is awesome school. I dont know coach or the girls. Maybe they can all talk and make it better. I do agree with others that many like his style. We should fix the wrongs why we all have time to do it. Teachers come on here all the time so they can chime in to help fix these problems. Most girls dont like getting yelled at, can we agree on that?

 

[MacDre]

I'm talking about the system the young ladies were brought up in as young girls. Cal is awesome school. I dont know coach or the girls. Maybe they can all talk and make it better. I do agree with others that many like his style. We should fix the wrongs why we all have time to do it. Teachers come on here all the time so they can chime in to help fix these problems. Most girls dont like getting yelled at, can we agree on that?

No one likes getting yelled but it is part of life. I like my kid playing sports because it’s a microcosm of the real world. The women that I served in the United States Marine Corps didn’t like getting yelled at either but they were forced to learn that shit rolls downhill so don’t stay at the bottom and they learned how to improvise, adapt, and overcome obstacles. Maybe these young ladies just don’t have what it takes and that’s okay. I have failed in my life and know that if it doesn’t kill you, it’ll make you stronger.

You make women seem weak.

 

[msoccerm]

There are 3 sides to every story. I will never condone coaches abusing their players, but it must be frustrating for coaches - after all it seems a large majority of girls play soccer to get a college scholarship or to get into a specific university. Only a small minority want to go pro. So although the girls are competing to get on the field once they are on the team are they trying to continually improve themselves technically or tactically or are they just going through the motions to not lose the scholarship? I am sure that there are a lot of girls that did what they needed to do to get into a Pac-12 team to get their parents off of their back and once on a team they are over it because they never loved soccer to begin with.

 

[MacDre]

There are 3 sides to every story. I will never condone coaches abusing their players, but it must be frustrating for coaches - after all it seems a large majority of girls play soccer to get a college scholarship or to get into a specific university. Only a small minority want to go pro. So although the girls are competing to get on the field once they are on the team are they trying to continually improve themselves technically or tactically or are they just going through the motions to not lose the scholarship? I am sure that there are a lot of girls that did what they needed to do to get into a Pac-12 team to get their parents off of their back and once on a team they are over it because they never loved soccer to begin with.

I’m not okay with abuse. Neil may lack tact but I have not seen anything to suggest abuse.
I think all of the young ladies that gave their testimony wanted to go pro and was seeking Neil’s support and encouragement and had their feelings hurt when they were rejected due to not being good enough. If they only wanted to go to Cal, they could quit and tell Neil to fuck off. These ladies are struggling with crushed dreams.
I don’t look at D1 as a development experience. Folks should be developed when they arrived. D1 should be viewed as a finishing school for developed players seeking professional opportunities.

The fact that many are expecting development and hand holding is indicative of unrealistic expectations on behalf of those players.

 

[crush]

No one likes getting yelled but it is part of life. I like my kid playing sports because it’s a microcosm of the real world. The women that I served in the United States Marine Corps didn’t like getting yelled at either but they were forced to learn that shit rolls downhill so don’t stay at the bottom and they learned how to improvise, adapt, and overcome obstacles. Maybe these young ladies just don’t have what it takes and that’s okay. I have failed in my life and know that if it doesn’t kill you, it’ll make you stronger.

You make women seem weak.

So Kicker likes this? Whatever dude. Dre, soccer is not the Marines and no coach should fat shame woman or young girls. I heard coaches call out 8th graders for gaining a few Lbs. You guys suck and you can have this old soccer if it stands. It's all yours. You can have it. Tell you what Kicker, have at it brah. I'm out!!!!

 

[crush]

One coach was getting mad at a young girl and he says, "are you on your period again." "Stop crying and dont tell your dad everything I say on the field." True hero's in coaching young ladies. BS coaches need to get lessons on how to talk ((not yell) at girls and females and how to help through a body the males no nothing about. Fat shaming is for losers. I'm appalled at some of you.

 

[crush]

Is yelling disrespectful?
You are OFF if you yell or are disrespectful in any way. This is true regardless of what the other person has done or is doing. Their behavior does not give you the green light to be harsh or verbally abusive (such as yelling, swearing at, name calling or belittling someone). Just coaches with power & control. U Little Female Marines need some tough love from drill Sargant? BS!!!!

 

[notintheface]

I am sure that there are a lot of girls that did what they needed to do to get into a Pac-12 team to get their parents off of their back and once on a team they are over it because they never loved soccer to begin with.

This, right here. They loved soccer, but they also didn't know how to tell their fucking helicopter parents that hey, it's just a game that I like to play with my friends.

This is why I will always always always tell parents to talk to their kids about keeping their grades up and pick the school based on what they want to do, not the "name" school that will put them on a team. Parents absolutely do not understand the burnout aspect and they push their kids in the 13-14-15 range in order to prep them for that 16-17-18 runup to get their kids "on a D1 team!!!!!1!!!!" and then wonder why their dd starts smoking pot like it's going out of style their freshman year.

 

[tjsoccer]

The central theme is that he is trying to get girls to quit who are under performing to their scholarship (or expectations). This isn't uncommon in College athletics, and I'm sure it is a bigger deal now that the Power 5 have 4 year scholarships.

Even though he may not be criminally abusive, he does sound like a big baby and I wouldn't play for him (not that he would ask me). I just don't think those tactics work that well to improve play. Maybe the athletically gifted, multi-sport athletes of years ago had a longer runway to reach their potential, and applying that sort of pressure seemed to work. But these days, the kid's youth career has been so dominated by a single sport and personal trainers, that I'll bet they reach their breaking point a little quicker (and the come into programs closer to their ceiling).

It is notable that we aren't hearing from ex-players who support him.

 

[MacDre]

So Kicker likes this? Whatever dude. Dre, soccer is not the Marines and no coach should fat shame woman or young girls. I heard coaches call out 8th graders for gaining a few Lbs. You guys suck and you can have this old soccer if it stands. It's all yours. You can have it. Tell you what Kicker, have at it brah. I'm out!!!!

I get that D1 soccer is not the Marines. I was in the Marines and I have several friends and family that played D1 and pro sports. In my humble opinion, the Marines is way easier than D1 or pro sports.

I am on the fence about fat shaming. When I was in H.S. I was tall and skinny and wanted go pro in football like damn near all of my friends. Only problem was that I’m not some genetic freak like my patna’s. So, when I showed up for double days everyone on the team laughed at me. The coach made me do all Carolina drill with Hannibal Navies, and I got trucked every time. So if coaches could skinny shame me and bully me into quitting because I didn’t have a good football physique; I didn’t quit, I was starting ball boy! Why cant ladies, be told they to do some “push backs” and loose some damn weight?

 

[crush]

This is why I will always always always tell parents to talk to their kids about keeping their grades up and pick the school based on what they want to do, not the "name" school that will put them on a team. Parents absolutely do not understand the burnout aspect and they push their kids in the 13-14-15 range in order to prep them for that 16-17-18 runup to get their kids "on a D1 team!!!!!1!!!!" and then wonder why their dd starts smoking pot like it's going out of style their freshman year.

Are you a coach Face? Where you coach at? Doc? Let's not forget, my kid got pushed for decision in 7th and 8th grade.