What would you do?

Joey said:
Since she plays 2010 now, most of the kids are playing in HS right now during the break in club play. If she played 2011 she would be the only HS kid.
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Looking at the 08/09 teams there has been a lot of changes in the players. Like the 2010 team they are gone during the break in club play for HS.
 
Joey said:
Yes, it is a private school and agreed the $ and playing time don’t add up for me for her to play HS.
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Catholic or otherwise religious? Virtually all of the big secular schools and some top religious sports have sports included in the tuition (indeed many of the top schools in particular sports give out “scholarships” sometimes characterized as need based). There maybe be nominal charges at some for uniforms or team food or gifts or equipment. But if you aren’t getting a tuition cut from the going private hs tuition rate (30-60k a year, with some like Harvard westlake and sierra canyon on the top end) then that’s insane and a really bad deal.
 
Grace T. said:
Catholic or otherwise religious? Virtually all of the big secular schools and some top religious sports have sports included in the tuition (indeed many of the top schools in particular sports give out “scholarships” sometimes characterized as need based). There maybe be nominal charges at some for uniforms or team food or gifts or equipment. But if you aren’t getting a tuition cut from the going private hs tuition rate (30-60k a year, with some like Harvard westlake and sierra canyon on the top end) then that’s insane and a really bad deal.
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Spend it if you got it!
 
Grace T. said:
Catholic or otherwise religious? Virtually all of the big secular schools and some top religious sports have sports included in the tuition (indeed many of the top schools in particular sports give out “scholarships” sometimes characterized as need based). There maybe be nominal charges at some for uniforms or team food or gifts or equipment. But if you aren’t getting a tuition cut from the going private hs tuition rate (30-60k a year, with some like Harvard westlake and sierra canyon on the top end) then that’s insane and a really bad deal.
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100% Grace T. My dd had some private high schools knocking on my door when she was 8th grade. I was a poor father at this time in my dd life so she had it all if I allowed her to wear a uniform to school every day and then full ride to Ivy school. I still remember parents on here in 2018 callig me names like, "what a stupid father." "Medal chaser" "Ruin your dd chances at full rides" and so much more. Full ride to Catholic HS and then Full ride (needs based) to Big Ivy or Big U in Socal was at my dd fingertips but I blew it for my dd because I saw some Docs cheating the system (getting paid in back room) to help others with more money and more weight to throw around. It's high stakes at these schools. If you can ball, it's free. If your catholic, you get the Catholic discount price and non-Catholics pay more.
 
Joey said:
Hello,

My daughter is a 2011 player that plays club on an ECNL-RL 2010 team. While not starting she gets a lot of minutes and is the 2nd leading scorer. She enjoys playing club. She also subs for the 2011 team when needed. Just joined the HS team and is on the FS team but gets very limited minutes (some games she does not play at all). When she has been in the game she has scored a few goals and has had a few assists even though she might only play for 10 minutes when put in. She is on the smaller side and is in HS even though she is a 2011. The HS she plays for has a top tier Varsity Soccer program. The end goal is not for her to play professionally or D1 soccer since realistically her academics will get her a scholarship in college. She enjoys the camaraderie of her teammates but is frustrated with the lack of minutes and the time involved where we believe that you improve through the pitch. In order to play on the HS team you also have to pay a large fee and do volunteer hours for the team. Based on the actions of the coaches, we feel that the coaches do not believe that she is a good enough player to get substantial minutes on the pitch (not asking to start). Would you continue with just the club or try to continue with the HS Team? The FS team has a winning record but is painful to watch. They play great defensive but offensively score very few goals since their soccer IQ is not very high and their passing and shooting is not very good, Thanking you in advance for your insights.
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RL is a complete waste of time unless you're Ronaldo (towards promotion to NL) or connected in some way to the coach, e.g., financially, sexually, drinking buds, dope dealer/client, pictures with children, etc. etc.... 9 out of 10 RL coaches could not coach the Bad News Bears;):cool:
 
Joey said:
It’s a hard decision, since she likes the camaraderie of the HS team, has the speed and the size difference due to age will lesson as she hits full puberty (late bloomer). But as some mentioned, play where it is most fun and at the current moment it is club due to the style of play and the impact she has on the game.
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Playing high school girls soccer is for fun as most college coaches will tell you.. Have told me.... But, like most thinks in smoggy socal, we're uber competitive in CIF... the coaches can be uber political too...
 
JeterwastheBEST said:
FACT - Parents are taking out student loans, yes student loans, to attend Sierra Canyon and Harvard Westlake... The insanity never ends...
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I know a few parents who pay nothing because their kids score goals for these schools. My pal told me he pays $1200 a month for his dd high school because he's non-Catholic and makes too much money:p
 
Joey said:
Hello,

My daughter is a 2011 player that plays club on an ECNL-RL 2010 team. While not starting she gets a lot of minutes and is the 2nd leading scorer. She enjoys playing club. She also subs for the 2011 team when needed. Just joined the HS team and is on the FS team but gets very limited minutes (some games she does not play at all). When she has been in the game she has scored a few goals and has had a few assists even though she might only play for 10 minutes when put in. She is on the smaller side and is in HS even though she is a 2011. The HS she plays for has a top tier Varsity Soccer program. The end goal is not for her to play professionally or D1 soccer since realistically her academics will get her a scholarship in college. She enjoys the camaraderie of her teammates but is frustrated with the lack of minutes and the time involved where we believe that you improve through the pitch. In order to play on the HS team you also have to pay a large fee and do volunteer hours for the team. Based on the actions of the coaches, we feel that the coaches do not believe that she is a good enough player to get substantial minutes on the pitch (not asking to start). Would you continue with just the club or try to continue with the HS Team? The FS team has a winning record but is painful to watch. They play great defensive but offensively score very few goals since their soccer IQ is not very high and their passing and shooting is not very good, Thanking you in advance for your insights.
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While parents can be unreliable in evaluating their own kid's abilities/talents because of the natural bias, it's dangerous as well to trust a singular coach to the job of evaluating a player. I've learned that parents often put way too much stock in the talent assessment skills of coaches at all levels. Predicting a player's future success is really damn hard in all sports. This explains why Tom Brady got drafted in the 7th round and Johnny Manziel or Zach Wilson go in the first round. Coaches and scouts are human. The only accurate evaluator is the field of play. Over time and multiple coaches and multiple levels of competition, a player (like water) will seek its proper level. If a player scores a lot of goals (a lot being defined as more than the majority of other players) on a particular team, they could probably stand to play for a higher level team. This cycle can continue up until the point at which they no longer score more than the average player on the team, or they have reached the highest level possible. Of course, this would require getting on the field, which requires a coach willing to give them playing time. If the coach isn't giving them playing time, it's the wrong team to be on, whether that is HS or club or college or rec league. That's a long way of saying, "Ditch this HS team and don't look back."

I'm glad that she's got a clear vision on what she wants to do as far as college goes and that playing college ball is not a motivator. That should go a long way to ensuring she'll be happy playing soccer no matter what level it is.
 
Mystery Train said:
While parents can be unreliable in evaluating their own kid's abilities/talents because of the natural bias, it's dangerous as well to trust a singular coach to the job of evaluating a player. I've learned that parents often put way too much stock in the talent assessment skills of coaches at all levels. Predicting a player's future success is really damn hard in all sports. This explains why Tom Brady got drafted in the 7th round and Johnny Manziel or Zach Wilson go in the first round. Coaches and scouts are human. The only accurate evaluator is the field of play. Over time and multiple coaches and multiple levels of competition, a player (like water) will seek its proper level. If a player scores a lot of goals (a lot being defined as more than the majority of other players) on a particular team, they could probably stand to play for a higher level team. This cycle can continue up until the point at which they no longer score more than the average player on the team, or they have reached the highest level possible. Of course, this would require getting on the field, which requires a coach willing to give them playing time. If the coach isn't giving them playing time, it's the wrong team to be on, whether that is HS or club or college or rec league. That's a long way of saying, "Ditch this HS team and don't look back."

I'm glad that she's got a clear vision on what she wants to do as far as college goes and that playing college ball is not a motivator. That should go a long way to ensuring she'll be happy playing soccer no matter what level it is
Mystery Train said:
While parents can be unreliable in evaluating their own kid's abilities/talents because of the natural bias, it's dangerous as well to trust a singular coach to the job of evaluating a player. I've learned that parents often put way too much stock in the talent assessment skills of coaches at all levels. Predicting a player's future success is really damn hard in all sports. This explains why Tom Brady got drafted in the 7th round and Johnny Manziel or Zach Wilson go in the first round. Coaches and scouts are human. The only accurate evaluator is the field of play. Over time and multiple coaches and multiple levels of competition, a player (like water) will seek its proper level. If a player scores a lot of goals (a lot being defined as more than the majority of other players) on a particular team, they could probably stand to play for a higher level team. This cycle can continue up until the point at which they no longer score more than the average player on the team, or they have reached the highest level possible. Of course, this would require getting on the field, which requires a coach willing to give them playing time. If the coach isn't giving them playing time, it's the wrong team to be on, whether that is HS or club or college or rec league. That's a long way of saying, "Ditch this HS team and don't look back."

I'm glad that she's got a clear vision on what she wants to do as far as college goes and that playing college ball is not a motivator. That should go a long way to ensuring she'll be happy playing soccer no matter what level it is.
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i like your assesment. We are fortunate that the club team appreciates her talent by letting her start on the 2011 team when she plays for them and gets many minutes on the 2010 team (main team). Also other teams have asked her to sub for them since they like her and appreciates her talents. At the end of the day, i look at the players ahead of her on the HS team and it will be difficult to replace them unless she surpasses (can’t match) their level of play (based on the coach) since they are the younger siblings of the Varsity players. We are going to let her finish the HS season since we already paid for it and realistically will be the only season she plays HS Soccer.
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Mystery Train said:
While parents can be unreliable in evaluating their own kid's abilities/talents because of the natural bias, it's dangerous as well to trust a singular coach to the job of evaluating a player. I've learned that parents often put way too much stock in the talent assessment skills of coaches at all levels. Predicting a player's future success is really damn hard in all sports. This explains why Tom Brady got drafted in the 7th round and Johnny Manziel or Zach Wilson go in the first round. Coaches and scouts are human. The only accurate evaluator is the field of play. Over time and multiple coaches and multiple levels of competition, a player (like water) will seek its proper level. If a player scores a lot of goals (a lot being defined as more than the majority of other players) on a particular team, they could probably stand to play for a higher level team. This cycle can continue up until the point at which they no longer score more than the average player on the team, or they have reached the highest level possible. Of course, this would require getting on the field, which requires a coach willing to give them playing time. If the coach isn't giving them playing time, it's the wrong team to be on, whether that is HS or club or college or rec league. That's a long way of saying, "Ditch this HS team and don't look back."

I'm glad that she's got a clear vision on what she wants to do as far as college goes and that playing college ball is not a motivator. That should go a long way to ensuring she'll be happy playing soccer no matter what level it is.
Click to expand...

I disagree with ditching the HS team unless they plan on changing schools. If his daughter has no intention of playing college soccer, HS soccer will be a good outlet to play. Eventually she will get more playing time and make the higher level teams. Quitting would be a bad look and make it difficult for her to come back the following year...of course assuming there's no coaching turnover. I would just shift the focus to the social piece. Most HS teams carry like 25 kid rosters at all levels. There are seniors on varsity getting very little time, but they love it because of the social part of it. They feel like they are part of something. Again, my views on this completely change if she has aspirations to play in college. I think it would be a big mistake to quit.
 
If your daughter is so good, why is she still on the RL team and just on the freshman team of her high school? There are quite of few freshman's playing on the varsity team of high level high schools in Orange County.
High school coaches just want to win games. If your daughter is good enough and can help them win, she will play regardless of any drama. Keep in mind, too, the big difference in pay disparity between public and private high school coaches. To consider quitting because the coaching isn't up to your standards make no sense. The purpose of high school is to have fun and play with her local soccer friends. You do not get recruited on your high school team.
 
#girldad said:
If your daughter is so good, why is she still on the RL team and just on the freshman team of her high school? There are quite of few freshman's playing on the varsity team of high level high schools in Orange County.
High school coaches just want to win games. If your daughter is good enough and can help them win, she will play regardless of any drama. Keep in mind, too, the big difference in pay disparity between public and private high school coaches. To consider quitting because the coaching isn't up to your standards make no sense. The purpose of high school is to have fun and play with her local soccer friends. You do not get recruited on your high school team.
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Daughter is a decent player that has her strengths (speed and soccer iq) and her weaknesses (size compared to the majority of players since she has not hit full puberty and could benefit more from touches with balls in the air) at the present time. Do we think she is the next Messi and the answer is no. Are there players better than she is and the answer is of course. In this HS, are there freshman on the Varsity, the answer is very few if any. Are there players that are recruited in this private HS absolutely. Could she play ECNL with kids her age and the answer is possibly. She plays on this ECNL RL team to play with her older friends in her grade since it is fun for her. Again her goal is not to play in college or pro but to currently play with a team of friends that know how to play where she gets substantial minutes (thats what she enjoys). The HS soccer games we have watched her play looks more like Rugby or hockey with the physicality more than what we see in club. We see why there are so many injuries. Agreed that the coaches want to win with who they believe are the best players that get them there since the school has a tradition of winning at the highest level with high level players. If you want to win playing rough and fast and kick it into open space forward you use the biggest, strongest and fastest players. If you want to play more finese you find the players with the best touches and passes and spread the pitch. We know that the coaches select the players that fit their style of play. Ultimately, it is based on where my daughter has the most fun and she values playing time the most. We did not select the school for the Soccer (even though the school is s top rated soccer team) but for the academics and what is offered in extra-curricular activities. There are options outside of HS soccer (if she is not satisfied with it) to play the game she enjoys. It is great getting different perspectives from the folks on this forum of whether to play HS soccer not.
 
Joey said:
It is great getting different perspectives from the folks on this forum of whether to play HS soccer not.
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I got a lot of perspective from the sage dads on here back in 2018 regarding my kid being blocked from playing in the Girls development Academy. This was a new league that made ECNL look like a sissy league. They made this rule that "NO ONE" can play in the GDA and HS Soccer. It was a big either you obey the rules, or you can't play. My dd chose fun and friends HS Soccer. After my kid made the hard choice, the rich dads that controlled the purse strings of this now failed league made an exception to their own rules so their own kids could play HS Soccer and the GDA. You know, have your cake and ice cream. "Daddy, I want to play HS Soccer as well. Daddy, I will quit your stupid league if I don't get what I want." Dads worked their magic and got waivers for ALL private school girls and ALL public-school kids got no waiver, only a choice. This right here is why I came on this forum. I found out after years of investigation that the elite rich cheaters hijacked their own elite league, for the elites. Anyone who can ball but is not elite but poor, can get a free ride as long as you STFU! Happy New Years Joey
 
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Soccer Dad & Ref said:
Joey keeps replying to Joey. What is going on here?
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Maybe Joey is Dom's first AI bot test on here. Meta is making millions of AI people with real pictures and real feelings to interact with. It's marketed to young teenage boys who just stay in their rooms all day playing video games. They can now interact with beautiful AI women.
 
The limited play time as a small, still growing freshman sounds like a blessing. She gets some time on the field for experience, but is not exposed to lots of physical play. If she likes it and you can afford it, stay on the team and as she gets older she can get more play time. She is also getting to practice with better players, which is an often overlooked benefit of HS soccer.
 
#girldad said:
High school coaches just want to win games. If your daughter is good enough and can help them win, she will play regardless of any drama.
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If only this were always true. First hand experience is that my kid was the only ECNL player and future 4 year college starter on her HS roster when she was a Junior. She was objectively a better player than the keeper the coach favored. The team was second in their league and lost their first round playoff game, so it wasn't like they were awful nor particularly great... yet the coach had a favorite, and my kid sat the bench in the most critical situations. Regardless of the "fun" and school-spirit aspects of HS soccer, which is why my DD wanted to play, she was really pissed off and miserable as a result of this, so quit before her senior year. I think your points are still valid for many situations, just not universal.
 
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