Univ of Oregon womens coach abusive?

bringing this thread back to on point:

Graeme Abel
university of oregon women's soccer coach
12 former players claiming abuse in April 2024

with June 15 recruiting date coming soon, families be aware.
Expect another parent to start a thread with _ _ _. I will wait. Sorry for getting off point Canada, it just pains me to see these coaches treat girls like crap. The girls work hard at their craft and make very little scholarship money if any and all the coaches make over $175K. Some Docs and coaches in the youth game make up to $200K. What do the girls get in return?
 
UC Davis has a Women's Soccer coach that fits the description of the post I commented on. Not sure where a female coach became a factor of the conversation.
i've heard for years about a norcal coach with his own girls club who is extremely abusive. berating, making fun of players, bringing girls to tears. lots of stories. wouldn't be surprised if someday, someone actually speaks up.

Because you responded "What is UC Davis, Alex?" after the OP wrote about a NorCal coach with HIS own girls club...

Or was your comment unrelated to that first one?
 
My daughter played with one of the 90 minute players that left and she said the culture was terrible. U of Florida coach next? Watch their portal numbers from yesterday’s opening.
My dd knew a player that bailed after her Fr season. Walking on eggshells and you best better not break any of the eggs. Players afraid to just go play and do your best. I know some players thrive under attack and pressure and yelling but most don't like being screamed at and threaten with loss of play time or scholarship. Many of these girls are on their own for the first time and already feel sad and lonely. Coaches need to chill out and not act like this.
 
Expect another parent to start a thread with _ _ _. I will wait. Sorry for getting off point Canada, it just pains me to see these coaches treat girls like crap. The girls work hard at their craft and make very little scholarship money if any and all the coaches make over $175K. Some Docs and coaches in the youth game make up to $200K. What do the girls get in return?
I'm glad more and more parents are starting to see the college scholarship scam for what it is.

Players need to get paid and colleges need to stop exploiting "student athletes" with the nonsense concept of amateurism.
 
I'm glad more and more parents are starting to see the college scholarship scam for what it is.

Players need to get paid and colleges need to stop exploiting "student athletes" with the nonsense concept of amateurism.
They want them to be "amateur" so they can yell and manipulate them. Employees and EVERYONE involved with FIFA need to adhere to FIFA's Code of Conduct. EVERYONE involved in the great sport of Futbol, football and Soccer need to be treated with Fairness, Respect and Dignity. Can you imagine working for someone who says the things alleged here.

"This can only be achieved by FIFA setting the highest ethical and integrity standards for others to follow. The Code of Conduct for Third Parties represents our ongoing commitment to operating with integrity and defines how we do business the right way, united by one set of key values that guide our daily decisions and actions." FIFA website

"Our relationships with our team members and our member associations, as well as with confederations, officials, fans, players, partners, sponsors and third parties are important to us. We always treat others in the way we expect to be treated, and we expect our third parties to act in the same way. Our working relationships must meet the values and spirit of our code of conduct. Everyone connected with football must be treated with fairness, respect and dignity. Our third parties must promote a positive work environment by treating others professionally and with mutual respect. We don’t tolerate discrimination, sexual harassment or abuse of power of any kind." FIFA
 
Last edited:
My kid will be playing her final year of NCAA eligibility next year and I would just say that this kind of awful behavior (the Oregon coach) is common in college soccer, and I would imagine most other sports. Oddly, the non-revenue generating sports in particular. My daughter had a bad coaching situation (very similar in terms of verbal abuse) and then one very good one. This mirrored her situation in club soccer, too. Some bad, some good. But to all the parents in youth soccer right now who are thinking about the whole college soccer thing and thus the ECNL, DA, and all other elite/premier/gold/supercalifragilistic club leagues, just know this: The coaches at the college level, including the vaunted P5 schools, are not any more sophisticated or intelligent than whatever you experienced in AYSO coaching or in the younger levels of club soccer. I know that such a statement is going to upset some folks and make some people here go apoplectic. I'm not saying that there are not some amazing and highly intelligent soccer coaches in college. There are. And some could coach professionally. And some are great human beings. But that's no different than club soccer coaches or AYSO coaches or elementary school teachers. I think that almost all youth soccer parents have a completely misguided picture of college athletics. I certainly did. We put college soccer coaches on some elevated plane because we've elevated getting a college soccer scholarship to some ridiculous ideal that is completely misguided.

It was my assumption that the higher level my kid played at, the better the coaches would be. This extended to the assumption that not only would they be better coaches, they would also be better communicators, better at caring, better at understanding, better at managing stress, better at handling setbacks, better at leading, better at bringing together a team, better under pressure... in short, better human beings. This might seem obvious in hindsight, but soccer coaches are not better human beings than any other random profession you can name. And just because someone managed to land successively higher paying jobs, it says nothing about their quality as a human being. Just take a look at any random CEO of any random company you want to pick. In fact, the level of job someone has says almost nothing about anything else except that they are good at landing jobs. That's it. That is the one difference between college coaches as a whole and full-time club coaches as a whole: The ones in college just happen to be better (or luckier or more interested) at landing college jobs. And guess what? Colleges are no better at finding and hiring good people than your local fast food joint.

Here's the real kicker: I was also depressed and shocked to learn that college coaches on the whole did not understand the sport itself much better than my kid's first U10 club coach (who wasn't particularly great in that regard, either). Again, there are exceptions. Tim Ward at Pepperdine is one I happen to have met. He's a great human and a great soccer coach. But he's not the norm. The tactical and strategic understanding of the game of most college coaches is simply a continuation of the EXACT. SAME. CRAP. that your kid learned the first two years of playing club ball. The number of coaches that get by on simply yelling at their players to "GO HARDER!" is astonishing. The moment I hear a coach tell a player that "it's all about GRIT!" I'm like, "Check, please." Take your average middle school PE teacher and have them watch "Miracle," and you've basically got 90% of our nation's soccer coaches at all levels. I'm not kidding.

Now, with all that said... Yes, you can find great coaches. But damn, parents. Arm yourselves and your kid with healthy doses of skepticism along the way to trying to find one. For every good one, there's 10 of these jackholes. And the name of the university means absolutely nothing in that regard.
 
My kid will be playing her final year of NCAA eligibility next year and I would just say that this kind of awful behavior (the Oregon coach) is common in college soccer, and I would imagine most other sports. Oddly, the non-revenue generating sports in particular. My daughter had a bad coaching situation (very similar in terms of verbal abuse) and then one very good one. This mirrored her situation in club soccer, too. Some bad, some good. But to all the parents in youth soccer right now who are thinking about the whole college soccer thing and thus the ECNL, DA, and all other elite/premier/gold/supercalifragilistic club leagues, just know this: The coaches at the college level, including the vaunted P5 schools, are not any more sophisticated or intelligent than whatever you experienced in AYSO coaching or in the younger levels of club soccer. I know that such a statement is going to upset some folks and make some people here go apoplectic. I'm not saying that there are not some amazing and highly intelligent soccer coaches in college. There are. And some could coach professionally. And some are great human beings. But that's no different than club soccer coaches or AYSO coaches or elementary school teachers. I think that almost all youth soccer parents have a completely misguided picture of college athletics. I certainly did. We put college soccer coaches on some elevated plane because we've elevated getting a college soccer scholarship to some ridiculous ideal that is completely misguided.

It was my assumption that the higher level my kid played at, the better the coaches would be. This extended to the assumption that not only would they be better coaches, they would also be better communicators, better at caring, better at understanding, better at managing stress, better at handling setbacks, better at leading, better at bringing together a team, better under pressure... in short, better human beings. This might seem obvious in hindsight, but soccer coaches are not better human beings than any other random profession you can name. And just because someone managed to land successively higher paying jobs, it says nothing about their quality as a human being. Just take a look at any random CEO of any random company you want to pick. In fact, the level of job someone has says almost nothing about anything else except that they are good at landing jobs. That's it. That is the one difference between college coaches as a whole and full-time club coaches as a whole: The ones in college just happen to be better (or luckier or more interested) at landing college jobs. And guess what? Colleges are no better at finding and hiring good people than your local fast food joint.

Here's the real kicker: I was also depressed and shocked to learn that college coaches on the whole did not understand the sport itself much better than my kid's first U10 club coach (who wasn't particularly great in that regard, either). Again, there are exceptions. Tim Ward at Pepperdine is one I happen to have met. He's a great human and a great soccer coach. But he's not the norm. The tactical and strategic understanding of the game of most college coaches is simply a continuation of the EXACT. SAME. CRAP. that your kid learned the first two years of playing club ball. The number of coaches that get by on simply yelling at their players to "GO HARDER!" is astonishing. The moment I hear a coach tell a player that "it's all about GRIT!" I'm like, "Check, please." Take your average middle school PE teacher and have them watch "Miracle," and you've basically got 90% of our nation's soccer coaches at all levels. I'm not kidding.

Now, with all that said... Yes, you can find great coaches. But damn, parents. Arm yourselves and your kid with healthy doses of skepticism along the way to trying to find one. For every good one, there's 10 of these jackholes. And the name of the university means absolutely nothing in that regard.
Thank you.

Thanks for mentioning Tim Ward too.

Since we have a hard time mentioning bad coaches, maybe we should be talking about great coaches out there. Any other coaches besides Tim?
 
My kid will be playing her final year of NCAA eligibility next year and I would just say that this kind of awful behavior (the Oregon coach) is common in college soccer, and I would imagine most other sports. Oddly, the non-revenue generating sports in particular. My daughter had a bad coaching situation (very similar in terms of verbal abuse) and then one very good one. This mirrored her situation in club soccer, too. Some bad, some good. But to all the parents in youth soccer right now who are thinking about the whole college soccer thing and thus the ECNL, DA, and all other elite/premier/gold/supercalifragilistic club leagues, just know this: The coaches at the college level, including the vaunted P5 schools, are not any more sophisticated or intelligent than whatever you experienced in AYSO coaching or in the younger levels of club soccer. I know that such a statement is going to upset some folks and make some people here go apoplectic. I'm not saying that there are not some amazing and highly intelligent soccer coaches in college. There are. And some could coach professionally. And some are great human beings. But that's no different than club soccer coaches or AYSO coaches or elementary school teachers. I think that almost all youth soccer parents have a completely misguided picture of college athletics. I certainly did. We put college soccer coaches on some elevated plane because we've elevated getting a college soccer scholarship to some ridiculous ideal that is completely misguided.

It was my assumption that the higher level my kid played at, the better the coaches would be. This extended to the assumption that not only would they be better coaches, they would also be better communicators, better at caring, better at understanding, better at managing stress, better at handling setbacks, better at leading, better at bringing together a team, better under pressure... in short, better human beings. This might seem obvious in hindsight, but soccer coaches are not better human beings than any other random profession you can name. And just because someone managed to land successively higher paying jobs, it says nothing about their quality as a human being. Just take a look at any random CEO of any random company you want to pick. In fact, the level of job someone has says almost nothing about anything else except that they are good at landing jobs. That's it. That is the one difference between college coaches as a whole and full-time club coaches as a whole: The ones in college just happen to be better (or luckier or more interested) at landing college jobs. And guess what? Colleges are no better at finding and hiring good people than your local fast food joint.

Here's the real kicker: I was also depressed and shocked to learn that college coaches on the whole did not understand the sport itself much better than my kid's first U10 club coach (who wasn't particularly great in that regard, either). Again, there are exceptions. Tim Ward at Pepperdine is one I happen to have met. He's a great human and a great soccer coach. But he's not the norm. The tactical and strategic understanding of the game of most college coaches is simply a continuation of the EXACT. SAME. CRAP. that your kid learned the first two years of playing club ball. The number of coaches that get by on simply yelling at their players to "GO HARDER!" is astonishing. The moment I hear a coach tell a player that "it's all about GRIT!" I'm like, "Check, please." Take your average middle school PE teacher and have them watch "Miracle," and you've basically got 90% of our nation's soccer coaches at all levels. I'm not kidding.

Now, with all that said... Yes, you can find great coaches. But damn, parents. Arm yourselves and your kid with healthy doses of skepticism along the way to trying to find one. For every good one, there's 10 of these jackholes. And the name of the university means absolutely nothing in that regard.
Thanks for sharing. I'm helping my sister-in-law trying to navigate the soccer scene. Her son has college opportunity and her dd might have even more. It's all about the door opener into some nice schools for her son and he gets it. He's looking at school first and then try to get in with soccer and do both and. Parents have done a great job with saving and kid has done great job with grades, staying out of trouble and doing his best at playing soccer. I think he will do D2 or NAIA. Maybe a top D1 but he's likes one school that is D2 and he can be the man. The D2 coaches seemed nicer with my kid and that's my sis in law is saying. Have you heard if there is a difference between D1 and D2 coaches?
 
They want them to be "amateur" so they can yell and manipulate them. Employees and EVERYONE involved with FIFA need to adhere to FIFA's Code of Conduct. EVERYONE involved in the great sport of Futbol, football and Soccer need to be treated with Fairness, Respect and Dignity. Can you imagine working for someone who says the things alleged here.

"This can only be achieved by FIFA setting the highest ethical and integrity standards for others to follow. The Code of Conduct for Third Parties represents our ongoing commitment to operating with integrity and defines how we do business the right way, united by one set of key values that guide our daily decisions and actions." FIFA website

"Our relationships with our team members and our member associations, as well as with confederations, officials, fans, players, partners, sponsors and third parties are important to us. We always treat others in the way we expect to be treated, and we expect our third parties to act in the same way. Our working relationships must meet the values and spirit of our code of conduct. Everyone connected with football must be treated with fairness, respect and dignity. Our third parties must promote a positive work environment by treating others professionally and with mutual respect. We don’t tolerate discrimination, sexual harassment or abuse of power of any kind." FIFA
NCAA has no connection with FIFA. NCAA even has its own set of rules. If you are dispensing advice to prospective NCAA parents and players, you should know this.
 
My kid will be playing her final year of NCAA eligibility next year and I would just say that this kind of awful behavior (the Oregon coach) is common in college soccer, and I would imagine most other sports. Oddly, the non-revenue generating sports in particular. My daughter had a bad coaching situation (very similar in terms of verbal abuse) and then one very good one. This mirrored her situation in club soccer, too. Some bad, some good. But to all the parents in youth soccer right now who are thinking about the whole college soccer thing and thus the ECNL, DA, and all other elite/premier/gold/supercalifragilistic club leagues, just know this: The coaches at the college level, including the vaunted P5 schools, are not any more sophisticated or intelligent than whatever you experienced in AYSO coaching or in the younger levels of club soccer. I know that such a statement is going to upset some folks and make some people here go apoplectic. I'm not saying that there are not some amazing and highly intelligent soccer coaches in college. There are. And some could coach professionally. And some are great human beings. But that's no different than club soccer coaches or AYSO coaches or elementary school teachers. I think that almost all youth soccer parents have a completely misguided picture of college athletics. I certainly did. We put college soccer coaches on some elevated plane because we've elevated getting a college soccer scholarship to some ridiculous ideal that is completely misguided.

It was my assumption that the higher level my kid played at, the better the coaches would be. This extended to the assumption that not only would they be better coaches, they would also be better communicators, better at caring, better at understanding, better at managing stress, better at handling setbacks, better at leading, better at bringing together a team, better under pressure... in short, better human beings. This might seem obvious in hindsight, but soccer coaches are not better human beings than any other random profession you can name. And just because someone managed to land successively higher paying jobs, it says nothing about their quality as a human being. Just take a look at any random CEO of any random company you want to pick. In fact, the level of job someone has says almost nothing about anything else except that they are good at landing jobs. That's it. That is the one difference between college coaches as a whole and full-time club coaches as a whole: The ones in college just happen to be better (or luckier or more interested) at landing college jobs. And guess what? Colleges are no better at finding and hiring good people than your local fast food joint.

Here's the real kicker: I was also depressed and shocked to learn that college coaches on the whole did not understand the sport itself much better than my kid's first U10 club coach (who wasn't particularly great in that regard, either). Again, there are exceptions. Tim Ward at Pepperdine is one I happen to have met. He's a great human and a great soccer coach. But he's not the norm. The tactical and strategic understanding of the game of most college coaches is simply a continuation of the EXACT. SAME. CRAP. that your kid learned the first two years of playing club ball. The number of coaches that get by on simply yelling at their players to "GO HARDER!" is astonishing. The moment I hear a coach tell a player that "it's all about GRIT!" I'm like, "Check, please." Take your average middle school PE teacher and have them watch "Miracle," and you've basically got 90% of our nation's soccer coaches at all levels. I'm not kidding.

Now, with all that said... Yes, you can find great coaches. But damn, parents. Arm yourselves and your kid with healthy doses of skepticism along the way to trying to find one. For every good one, there's 10 of these jackholes. And the name of the university means absolutely nothing in that regard.
ABSOLUTELY SPOT ON. My daughter had a couple of really good, we still keep in contact, club coaches at her youth level. We still talk to this day about the impact they had not only on her, but our family. Kudos to them because they are Extremely few and far between. College wsoc is Nothing, i repeat Nothing, on how we depicted it would end up being in her club years. My dd had an amazing and accoladed youth career, and we believed heavily in the coach that was rolling out the red carpet for her, we all thought he had her best interests in mind. P4 school, amazing scholarship offer, good roster, etc. That's where we went wrong. It turned into an utter nightmare. Even though my kid played as a freshman, she was so fearful of her coach, that she became an entirely different person and player. This coach was awful. Degrading awful. This coach was put on probation for some of his sideline antics and verbal abuse to his players. It's not tough love at that point anymore. The worst situation we could have ever put her in. He would target a few of the "weaker" players, every season, that he would take out all his frustrations on. My dd's roommate was one of them. Girl ended up leaving before the semester ever ended. My dd transferred last spring, and is entering her senior year this fall. Better fit all around. On the flip side, she has to redshirt this year after suffering a season ending injury, which is an entirely different animal. In the end, I wish we knew more, understood more, and asked more questions during that time. All that shimmers isn't gold.
 
NCAA has no connection with FIFA. NCAA even has its own set of rules. If you are dispensing advice to prospective NCAA parents and players, you should know this.
I knew you would write this, I kid you not. I have an answer for you. The NCAA should have similar code of conduct as FIFA. What do you think? EVERYONE connected to college sports needs to be treated with Fairness (no man playing with and against the girls), Respect (stop screaming, yelling, abusing and manipulating our dd), and treat all with Dignity.
 
Last edited:
NCAA is talking about removing limits on number of scholarships per team. This is likely to happen.

I think if a girl plays on the college team, has a great attitude and works hard, she shall get a free education, plus free food, housing and a per diem. The girls that sit during the games are the ones at practice pushing the starters. I think all the players on the roster should be free. Make roster 30 max and 22 roster for the game.
 
Back
Top