The Pit of Misery! Dilly Dilly!
Posted at 4:15 am on August 22, 2020 by Robert A. Hahn
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This photo provided by Bud Light shows a scene from the company’s Super Bowl spot. For the 2018 Super Bowl, marketers are paying more than $5 million per 30-second spot to capture the attention of more than 110 million viewers. (Bud Light via AP)
We’re all in the Pit of Misery now. I know this because I watched the DNC the last two nights, and I heard all about it. America is a smoking ruin. No one has a job. In fact no one will ever have a job again unless we get rid of that awful Trump. Those few Americans who have not yet died from the virus have no health care. Poor immigrant mothers who were separated from their families by being deported during the Clinton Administration, and then deported again under Obama after they snuck back in, have been deported yet again by Trump. He is so cruel. He doesn’t care.
Our crops are destroyed, the fields barren. The climate is so disrupted that cyclonic windstorms cross the Atlantic, bringing thunder and rain to Florida and Mississippi at the height of Summer. Even our Post Office, once the envy of the world, delivers only half as much mail now as it did when Bill Clinton was President.
I call this “the Clinton campaign.” Remember her? Same act: a laundry list of things that aren’t the way humans wish they were. We voters were supposed to connect the dots and realize that if we voted for Hillary, the clouds would vanish, the birds would sing, and everyone would be a millionaire. For some reason not enough people believed that, and she didn’t win.
Now here they come, trying it again. You’re supposed to be afraid of this. Be afraid of that. Disease will get you. The Sun will burn you up. The wolf is coming, you can hear him breathing. The only thing that can save you is new politicians, our politicians. Elect this guy, and the virus will be gone. Jobs glorious jobs will droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven upon the place beneath. I guess people used to fall for stuff like this, but I don’t think enough of them do anymore that you can win an election with it. If that stuff worked, Hillary would have been running against Jeb Bush or Marco Rubio. Didn’t the Democrats learn anything from the 2016 election?