Couple excerpts from FBI Director Kash Patels testimony in front of of the Senate today:
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Senator Dick Durbin: "Do you believe those who have previously stolen from employers, solicited sex, or engaged in bestiality are qualified candidates that the FBI is losing?"
Kash Patel: "We did not want to punish victims of bestiality."
Sen Durbin: "You dropped automatic disqualification for applicants who have engaged in bestiality, not VICTIMS of bestiality. Applicants who have engaged, do you disagree with that?"
Patel: "Applicants who've engaged in bestiality means they were victims of bestiality."
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I honestly don't know if goats and sheep are applying to the FBI. And at this point I wouldn't be surprised either way.
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Senator John N. Kennedy: "Why would you even get into bestiality?"
Patel: "We are not into bestiality, but a lot of these individuals…"
Sen. Kennedy: "But you changed the qualifications and mentioned bestiality!"
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A lot? A LOT? A lot of the people applying to the FBI have BESTIALITY IN THEIR BACKGROUNDS. A LOT? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? But then again, looking at who applies to ICE, yeah, I can totally believe it.
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Sen. Kennedy: "If Joe participated in bestiality, not as the animal but as the human, don't you think he should be disqualified?"
Patel: "If he voluntarily did it, sure."
Sen. Kennedy: "How do you INVOLUNTARILY do it?"
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Listen, when John Kennedy, John N. Kennedy from Louisiana for fornication's sake, holds the moral high ground in a debate over sheep screwing, at a minimum we really need to investigate the other guy in the conversation.
I don't even... bestiality? What? How? I'm trying to make sense of this and all I can come up with is that they started recruiting from all those unemployed Texas cattle ranchers...
Oh just don't. Like I'm the one being ridiculous here.
The worst part, this exchange with Patel where the Director of the FBI honestly seems to believe the VICTIMS of BESTIALITY are the sheep-diddlers and NOT the livestock isn't even the most ridiculous or troubling part of his insane testimony.
Go listen to what he had to say about sending sheep-forking FBI agents to polling stations in November.
You people are sick bastards.
