The Inevitable New The Inevitable Trump Mocking Thread

Nonononono said:
I see this thread is dropping. It’s popular enough to get posts without my personal intervention. But since I’m here, and still in this damn waiting room for my weekly Santa Monica beach walk colon hydrotherapy session, I might as well tell yet another incontrovertible and exceedingly embarrassing personal anecdote about the local nincompoops’ hero.

The source is Ivanka. She’s told it to so many friends in NYC over the years before her creepy father ran for president. It’s really not even debatable as a false story.

He had the typical male pattern baldness. Once it stabilized to the extend his hair on the sides and lower back side of his head would not also go bald in time, he had a surgical procedure to remove the bald skin and stretch the skin with hair around the top of his head to be sewn together.

Thus no bald skin anymore. But an alarmingly weird scalp, thus he had to grow out all of his remaining hair, so as to swirl it in several directions, all with heavy hair spray along the way, each layer until all the hair was covering not only the actual cranium but feathered outward and downward that leaves no visible hairline.

That leads many to think it’s a rug. Like Hal Fishman’s hair helmet.

Ivanka relished telling friends of this, along with his use of Men’s Only hair coloring, but his impatience never allows time for the selected color to set. Leaving the golden retriever look no other human in history has had the misfortune of naturally having, let alone choosing to adopt.
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He doesn't trust a fellow TV pitchman?

 
Pore, pour Paulie Jumpsuit. He has to move and has to wear a jump suit.

Don't worry Killary will soon be wearing a pantsuit IN JAIL with Paulie and Obummer. It's coming. With Gohmert and Gowdy and a DENTIST (DDS!) leading the charge, how can it fail! They're going to FLOSS KILLARY right to the PEN!!! MAGA!
 
Been quite some time since we have witnessed such grace and beauty in the White House.

NINTCHDBPICT000420003899.jpg

MEL WOW!
 
DOJ press conference at 11:45 EST.

I'm tell you, today is Friday the 13th and Killary's luck just got bad... Lock Her Up! I'm thinking Trifecta: Killary, Obummer and Seth Rich's murderer - Joe Biden! (bet you didnt' see that coming!) You heard it here first!
 
Friesland said:
DOJ press conference at 11:45 EST.

I'm tell you, today is Friday the 13th and Killary's luck just got bad... Lock Her Up! I'm thinking Trifecta: Killary, Obummer and Seth Rich's murderer - Joe Biden! (bet you didnt' see that coming!) You heard it here first!
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LOCK 'EM ALL UP! . . . so Trump's past associates have someone to play cards with.
 
Friesland said:
DOJ press conference at 11:45 EST.

I'm tell you, today is Friday the 13th and Killary's luck just got bad... Lock Her Up! I'm thinking Trifecta: Killary, Obummer and Seth Rich's murderer - Joe Biden! (bet you didnt' see that coming!) You heard it here first!
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Maybe they are gonna give one of your pedophile movie star friends a pass.
 
It's happening!!!!! Lock her up (in pantsuits!) Lock Her Up (in pantsuits!)...

I can't hardly stand the suspense. Maybe Joe Biden AND Tim Kaine!!!
 
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