Photo by Ian Forsyth/Getty Images
MALKIN: Death Be Not Loud
by
Michelle MalkinSeptember 8, 2018
Question: What is more cringe-inducing than a celebrity funeral?
Answer: Two back-to-back celebrity funerals.
The ghoulish twin spectacles last week memorializing Aretha Franklin and John McCain brought out the worst in family, friends and frenemies. No matter your partisan affiliation, these vulgar exercises in self-indulgence should serve as object lessons on how not to depart with dignity.
There was the nation's most infamous anti-Semite, Louis Farrakhan, smiling like the Cheshire cat onstage with hate crime hoax godfather Al Sharpton and shakedown con artist Jesse Jackson, who exploited his honored platform to threaten funeral attendees: "If you leave here today and don't register to vote, you're dishonoring Aretha."
There was lascivious 72-year-old Bill Clinton ogling 25-year-old Ariana Grande, who was wearing slightly more fabric than she normally wears, roughly equivalent to two 12- by 12-inch lace doilies, as she warbled "Natural Woman." (Clinton's latest public display of asininity closely rivaled his indecent conduct at his former Commerce Secretary Ron Brown's funeral, where the master media manipulator fake-cried after news videographers captured him yukking it up after the National Cathedral service.)
There was boorish Bishop Charles H. Ellis III copping a side-feel of Grande's barely covered bosom in the name of "friendliness."
There was Atlanta pastor Jasper Williams hijacking the Detroit dais to share his unsolicited views on crime and parenting.
And there was Georgetown professor Michael Eric Dyson taking a somber moment to honor Aretha Franklin's transcendent talent by wallowing in Trump Derangement Syndrome. Dyson called the president a "lugubrious leech," "dopey doppleganger of deceit and deviance," "lethal liar," "dimwitted dictator" and "foolish fascist."
A-plus for alliterative abomination!
Not to be outdone by the disrespectful requiem for the Queen of Soul, the five-day, three-city McCain processional marathon featured a vindictive blacklist (reportedly devised by the decedent himself); passive-aggressive eulogy swipes at President Trump by Meghan McCain, Joe Biden, Barack Obama and George W. Bush; and a hyperbolic media declaration about how the late Arizona senator's passing augured "the death of political courage" itself.
