Coaches Responsibility

Not_that_Serious said:
Haha. Haven’t heard that one before. Doesn’t help when there is a ref shortage. I think some of the refs that remain are those with the attitude that allows them to take the abuse - some who give it back. Think many times it escalates when coaches don’t control parents and the kids on the bench. Also been seeing Sunday League attitudes at club games a lot more.
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So sad. My wife's dad is "old school Ref" and "old school club coach" from Guatemala. He don't take any shit from any monster dad or dad with attack dog or mama bear from sidelines who think their kid should play or start every game. He took charge and no one talked back to him. He told me he would have been fired by todays parents who own and run youth soccer. Not all refs can command that kind of respect. We need to pay refs better, recruit tough folks who hold MMA background and arm them to the teeth to knock this behavior out of soccer once and for all.
 
I posted this story on another thread in the past, but since we are talking bad behavior, here is is again:

When my 2007 was a U9 they played in a Memorial Day tournament. My DD collided with/fouled a girl on the other team, who fell on the ground crying. The girl’s mother over reacted and sprinted out onto the field to attend to her kid. All the girls took a knee.

The referee, who was about 60, started yelling at the mother to get off the field. The girl was fine and shook it off pretty quick. One of the parents on the same team as the mother started screaming F bombs at the referee for yelling at the mother.

The referee walked towards the yelling dad, trying to calm him down. The guy proceeded to two hand shove the referee in the chest, knocking him to the ground. Referee reached into his pocket, grabbed the his phone and called 911.

That triggered a bunch of the parents on the other team to all got into it with each other, almost to the point of punches. I heard later that a few of them had it with the guy who pushed the referee and it had been building all year.

Our parents were also yelling at the guy who pushed the referee and within five minutes there were three cop cars with sirens and flashing blue lights racing up to the field. Game got cancelled.

Two teams full of nine year old girls got a front row seat for the whole thing. Just a complete embarrassment all around. Good news was that within 10 minutes of leaving the field all my kid cared about was where we were getting ice cream.
 
I will throw this last one I promise. I remember back in the day my dds old all star goat team beat another opponent again in a tournament. Anyway, this one mama bear from the other team was pissed at this one girl on our team who was tough as nails and wouldn't take anything from anyone. Her old man was super cool too. Anyway, this mama bear felt all the blame went to the dad because they were blood and I guess because the dad raised her to be a tough playa. Me and the dad were sharing bag of sunflower seeds and were just chilling at Norco fields where it was super windy that day. After the game she comes downwind between him and I and is just going off, crying and telling us dads that we trained are kids to be wild beast, animals and aggressive and all that BS. So dad let's out a shell about 10 yards away from her and I kid you not, the shell lands right on her cheek and stays there. Oh God, she went tornado on us and accused this dad of spitting on her and actually filed a police report for battery and assault. Judge dropped it quickly.
 
I feel alot of verbal abuse comes out of 90% of coaches with English accents. Especially those at FC Golden State. That club is like a mob. They always have teams that are bitchy and whining. That gets picked up from the coach that keeps berating the referee crews and opposing sides tactics.

How hard is it for people to learn to shut their mouth and not start drama. Grow up, you're supposed to be role models...
 
Justus said:
I'm always hard on the dads. I remember one dad was so pissed his baby goat didn't start he ran across the field after the game and let that coach have it. I think that kid started the rest of the year so something happen in that talk. I do have some real crazy mama bear stories but since I'm a guy I didn't want to make the moms look bad. I'll share just one "mama bear, my dd didn't play at all insanity." Grand parents, Uncles, Aunts and the rest of the family drove two hours to Long Beach and Grand Daughter saw ZERO action. Grandma Bear and Mama Bear let that coach have it like I've never seen. Two grown up ladies screaming at the top of their lungs at the male coach like they were going to maul his face off like two rabid Grizzly Bears. I thought PaPa Bear was going to kick the coaches ass but they just left and we never saw them again. I do think all the good coaches have it the 2nd hardest, slightly behind the refs at this time. Monster dads are Gnarly too. I had one that was 6' 4, 250 and ready to kill me 7 years ago and on Meth.....
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You understand a coach that caves to parents about playing time with threats is a bigger piece of shit then a coach who gets in a verbal altercations for running his mouth.
 
Chalklines said:
You understand a coach that caves to parents about playing time with threats is a bigger piece of shit then a coach who gets in a verbal altercations for running his mouth.
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I agree sir. Both are wrong but coach who caves to the play time and position sham(e) is by far the worse coach. It's tough on coaches. Parents pay his or her bills and some have lot's of extra cash. I was sitting in my truck at Great Park parking lot last week and I was parked next to a Mercedes and Beamer. Coach with a bag balls around his neck and clip board is walking with a couple dads with boys. He was sharing how much both boys have showed improvement and should be seeing more starts and play time. One dad hopped in his Beamer and yelled out his window to the coach to not forget about the poker game at his house on Friday night.
 
Many years ago we had a parent on the team that was a policeman. Every once in a while he would show up to a home game in uniform, standing on the sideline. There was never any problem with parents from either team at those games, lol
 
JV6 said:
I was at my daughter's game yesterday and on the field next to ours, several fights broke out at the end of the game. The fight was between 03 FC Premier and CDA Slammers. After the game, there were fights between players, Players going after refs, parents going after the opposing coach, and parents going after player. At no point did the coaches on either team do anything to deescalate the situation. In fact, the Premier coach seemed to encourage it. I know in these times everyone likes to blame the refs for EVERYTHING, but at what point do the coaches be held accountable for not only the play/behavior of their players, but also the parents?
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He/She is correct. I saw the whole thing as my daughter played on the same field after the scrum. Premier played physical (little too physical) from what I witnessed.players threw punches, cards were thrown for players and immediately for Coach. some Premier sidelines/parents were way out of line and were on the field. Premier was up 1-0 until the final minute or so then Slammers tied it right before final whistle and then it just escalated. Refs did a great job of trying to control the game and even after keeping everyone separated. some premier parents continued their tirade over to the player's side and saw more punches thrown. allegedly slammers coach was punched by a premier player and police were called... just another day in some nice friendly games on the pitch. SMH
 
Dirtnap said:
He/She is correct. I saw the whole thing as my daughter played on the same field after the scrum. Premier played physical (little too physical) from what I witnessed.players threw punches, cards were thrown for players and immediately for Coach. some Premier sidelines/parents were way out of line and were on the field. Premier was up 1-0 until the final minute or so then Slammers tied it right before final whistle and then it just escalated. Refs did a great job of trying to control the game and even after keeping everyone separated. some premier parents continued their tirade over to the player's side and saw more punches thrown. allegedly slammers coach was punched by a premier player and police were called... just another day in some nice friendly games on the pitch. SMH
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Two eyewitness accounts is compelling. This stuff needs to hit the news. Anyone catch video of this? If I'm a Ref, unless you pay me $500 a game, if I see violence like that I'm running to my car. Did Premier get pissed off that Slammers tied it at last minute and it just went whacho after that? Are folks betting these games in Little Saigon card rooms?
 
Some Clarity. It was not FC premier my apologies to the club it was Tigres vs Slammers HB boys flight 1. 03 Original poster might be mistaken as well as it sounded just like the incident I witnessed at Westminster High
 
I reffed games in the OC for a while, those parents are an extra breed of crazy...I had a coach from the Galaxy taunting and following me to my car after a game at StubHub because he was upset about a pk call. Even after the explanation he still wanted to talk. Just nuts.
 
Not_that_Serious said:
"Always funny when I see people ask if they made it up on here. I think the majority of people aren’t running on to a soccer forum to make up fights"
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I think were entering uncharted waters.

Art said:
I reffed games in the OC for a while, those parents are an extra breed of crazy...I had a coach from the Galaxy taunting and following me to my car after a game at StubHub because he was upset about a pk call. Even after the explanation he still wanted to talk. Just nuts.
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To you feel safe Art in this extra breed of crazy as ref? I have learned one big thing in all my sports years: Refs never change a call from a parent complaining and they for sure wont change it in the parking a lot. I might give a ref a chirp for my perceived bad call, but follow to the car, never...……..
 
Justus said:
I think were entering uncharted waters.


To you feel safe Art in this extra breed of crazy as ref? I have learned one big thing in all my sports years: Refs never change a call from a parent complaining and they for sure wont change it in the parking a lot. I might give a ref a chirp for my perceived bad call, but follow to the car, never...……..
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I have seen referee (crews) change a call because of a parent yelling something to the referee after a call was made (by an AR). Call was changed from a PK to a drop ball given to the GK. I think referees need to be able to be thick skinned in some cases. Not all stuff yelled from the sidelines is disrespectful. There is obviously a red line the sidelines should not cross. I use to referee a couple of years ago before it became impossible due to my kids soccer travel schedule and every once in a while someone on the sideline whether it was a coach or parent said something that was totally reasonable and made me officiate a little differently.
 
Dirtnap said:
Some Clarity. It was not FC premier my apologies to the club it was Tigres vs Slammers HB boys flight 1. 03 Original poster might be mistaken as well as it sounded just like the incident I witnessed at Westminster High
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My Bad, I thought it was FC Premier. But it was definitely the same game.
 
I'm not really sure how many lunatics come on here and make up stories, but I don't have any reason to. I don't have any affiliations with either club that was fighting, my daughter is in her 2nd year of Club and she's only been with 1 club. I really have more interesting stuff to do with my time than come on here and make up some shit
 
Dirtnap said:
Some Clarity. It was not FC premier my apologies to the club it was Tigres vs Slammers HB boys flight 1. 03 Original poster might be mistaken as well as it sounded just like the incident I witnessed at Westminster High
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Don't get to play Slammers teams, unless it's a tournament, as my DD plays CSL. That being said, that club seems to have a reputation for unacceptable behavior at all ages, and both on the girl's and boy's side. Coincidence? I think when they look for "impact players" they quite mean it literally.
 
JV6 said:
It was at Westminister HS yesterday
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I was there. I wasn't involved with that game but I saw it getting progressively chippy and then the last five minutes it mellowed. Of Course, during the handshake line is when it's got more intense (I'm all for a wave and a "thanks for the game" between teams when it gets like this Sportsmanship is important but not at the same if safe) They were broken up and seemed to be over then one of the kids had to say one more thing which got both teams face to face again. at that point I saw the slammers coach try to help but with 30+ 16yr olds I'm not sure how that would help. when you end up3³the lawsuit a parent files naming the coach for as defendant because when he held the kid back from fighting another kids decks him and now his career is over. (so asking the coach to stop something isn't very fair. what is fair is when I as a parent grab my kid by the hair and drag him off field for making his club his team his friends and his family look like the Beverly Hillbillies. so as OP mentioned just about over and some dad just starts with his Wu tang impersonation and talks trash to a kid. at that point I think every realized enough was enoug . they had stop the game next them which was 07s or 06s and I remember the slammers coach say "dude their children watching " and it kind of broke the intensity of the dad. next the head ref on site says they are calling police. Ten minutes later you see a cop car driving with purpose on the side road. I saw the kid with the put of control dad and thought he looked distraught probably just embarrassed but man felt bad for the bo . so confirm what happened but give some credit to coaches. as I was standing between the two field . next to stadium so had a good vie .
 
Art said:
I feel alot of verbal abuse comes out of 90% of coaches with English accents. Especially those at FC Golden State. That club is like a mob. They always have teams that are bitchy and whining. That gets picked up from the coach that keeps berating the referee crews and opposing sides tactics.

How hard is it for people to learn to shut their mouth and not start drama. Grow up, you're supposed to be role models...
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Out of all the clubs/teams/coaches/parents in SoCal you managed to narrow it down to just ONE club?? C’mon..
Sounds more like someone with an ax to grind...
I remember a few years ago there was a thread on here from some disgruntled parent railing on Hollywood FC.
 
Art said:
I reffed games in the OC for a while, those parents are an extra breed of crazy...I had a coach from the Galaxy taunting and following me to my car after a game at StubHub because he was upset about a pk call. Even after the explanation he still wanted to talk. Just nuts.
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why does OC get blamed for the stubhub center?
 
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