Dilemma, great coach on a bad team

rubtap

BRONZE
Sorry this is a long post but I need some advice. I have a ten year old daughter who just completed her first year of club soccer on a flight 3 team. She played one season of 5v5 before joining with not much experience. She didn't even know how to dribble with her laces. Most of her teammates all played "together" in AYSO for a couple years. This is their first year in club as well. There was 4 girls on the team of 15 girls who knew how to play and the rest were recreation league status IMO. Two of them "were" definitely flight 2 status, 1 was possibly flight 1 worthy. My daughter started in the middle of the pack but was clearly the second best player on the team before the end of the season. Now that the season has ended, the two girls I mentioned previously that were at the top, along with 1 of the other decent players, left the team. The rest of the girls still seemed to be playing at the same skill level they started at, despite being together for years now. Currently, besides my daughter, there might be one of them that is flight 3 worthy and maybe one that is AYSO select worthy, but that's as good as it gets. I honestly don't think we will score a single goal this coming season. My daughter plays center back and already had her hands full this past year and I think its going to get worse for her (but im my eyes thats more experience). Most of the team doesn't do any outside training other than the 2 practices a week with the team. My daughter has 2 trainers and practices 3-5 days a week besides the 2 team practices. The coach is awesome and is an ex professional. He sees a lot of potential in my daughter and has asked her to start training with his 12yr old girls immediately after her regular practice and will get a couple minutes in a few games this upcoming season to help her develop faster( She also does private training with some of those girls too). He knows she has a desire to play college and professional so he's doing all he can to help her down that path. They are flight 1 and on the cusp of moving up to NPL. He said that in two years she will be on their team and to please trust him as he is aware of how bad the 2014 team is. But, it has my wife and I conflicted. I'm not all about the wins. I know the benefits of playing against worthy opponents and how that can help you excel. And although she's not getting that from her 2014 team, I feel she will get it from training with the 2012s. My wife Feels that she would be better off switching teams in hopes to get on a flight 2 team or at least a flight 3 that is competitive. She can't phantom the idea of having to stick it out 2 more years on this team , let alone 1. She also has a hard time having to spend so much money and travel to be on a team that will not be competitive, which I get. But I just feel the opportunity to play with older girls that are more competitive, is priceless. It's like she's getting a 2 for 1 deal, although she's just not getting the minutes in games with the 2012 girls. There's no guarantee we are going to find her a flight 2 team, nor a starting position. With her current team, she plays the entire game and that's experience in itself. Her left and right back will probably now have to move up to mid and striker to fill the other girl's spots, which is going to make her much more vulnerable in her position. And she's going to take a lickin but I think that's just gonna make her that much better. Again our team isn't very strong so I feel that there's going to be a lot of action on our side of the pitch, which in return, is a lot of learning and experience for my daughter. What do you guys think we should do?
 
Sorry this is a long post but I need some advice. I have a ten year old daughter who just completed her first year of club soccer on a flight 3 team. She played one season of 5v5 before joining with not much experience. She didn't even know how to dribble with her laces. Most of her teammates all played "together" in AYSO for a couple years. This is their first year in club as well. There was 4 girls on the team of 15 girls who knew how to play and the rest were recreation league status IMO. Two of them "were" definitely flight 2 status, 1 was possibly flight 1 worthy. My daughter started in the middle of the pack but was clearly the second best player on the team before the end of the season. Now that the season has ended, the two girls I mentioned previously that were at the top, along with 1 of the other decent players, left the team. The rest of the girls still seemed to be playing at the same skill level they started at, despite being together for years now. Currently, besides my daughter, there might be one of them that is flight 3 worthy and maybe one that is AYSO select worthy, but that's as good as it gets. I honestly don't think we will score a single goal this coming season. My daughter plays center back and already had her hands full this past year and I think its going to get worse for her (but im my eyes thats more experience). Most of the team doesn't do any outside training other than the 2 practices a week with the team. My daughter has 2 trainers and practices 3-5 days a week besides the 2 team practices. The coach is awesome and is an ex professional. He sees a lot of potential in my daughter and has asked her to start training with his 12yr old girls immediately after her regular practice and will get a couple minutes in a few games this upcoming season to help her develop faster( She also does private training with some of those girls too). He knows she has a desire to play college and professional so he's doing all he can to help her down that path. They are flight 1 and on the cusp of moving up to NPL. He said that in two years she will be on their team and to please trust him as he is aware of how bad the 2014 team is. But, it has my wife and I conflicted. I'm not all about the wins. I know the benefits of playing against worthy opponents and how that can help you excel. And although she's not getting that from her 2014 team, I feel she will get it from training with the 2012s. My wife Feels that she would be better off switching teams in hopes to get on a flight 2 team or at least a flight 3 that is competitive. She can't phantom the idea of having to stick it out 2 more years on this team , let alone 1. She also has a hard time having to spend so much money and travel to be on a team that will not be competitive, which I get. But I just feel the opportunity to play with older girls that are more competitive, is priceless. It's like she's getting a 2 for 1 deal, although she's just not getting the minutes in games with the 2012 girls. There's no guarantee we are going to find her a flight 2 team, nor a starting position. With her current team, she plays the entire game and that's experience in itself. Her left and right back will probably now have to move up to mid and striker to fill the other girl's spots, which is going to make her much more vulnerable in her position. And she's going to take a lickin but I think that's just gonna make her that much better. Again our team isn't very strong so I feel that there's going to be a lot of action on our side of the pitch, which in return, is a lot of learning and experience for my daughter. What do you guys think we should do?
I would move her 100%. If she is at all competitive 2 more years of losing to "maybe" make the 2012s sounds rough and recipe for not having fun at all. My daughter is a 2014 and just switched teams. If you happen to be in South Orange County, message me if you want info about the team we picked (flight 2 but we picked it for the excellent coach).
 
1-If your kid is "clearly" the 2nd best player on a F3 team, it's time to move up.
2-The whole 2012 dual training thing sounds very questionable. If your 2014 kid is good enough to hang with a 2012 F1 team, she should already be playing 2014 or 2013 F1. My guess is it has more to do with keeping you as a private client.
3-Whenever a coach tells me he will make sure my kid will go pro/D1, I just tune him out completely. Our U9 F1 team (undefeated in SoCal) had lots of ballers. By U12 only 2 of the original members still remain for one reason or another. No coach can guarantee a path to pro/D1.
4-You might consider separating your text into paragraphs. :)

Sorry to be so blunt, but these are my first impressions. Best of luck.
 
2-The whole 2012 dual training thing sounds very questionable. If your 2014 kid is good enough to hang with a 2012 F1 team, she should already be playing 2014 or 2013 F1.
This.

That's a huge gap. The progression would be something along the lines of 14F3, 14F2, 13F3, 14F1, 12AYSO, 13F2,, 12F3, 13F1, 12F2, 12F1. Feel free to reorder everything between the bookends, but you get the point...it's a huge gap between 2014 F3 and 2012 F1.
 
Sorry this is a long post but I need some advice. I have a ten year old daughter who just completed her first year of club soccer on a flight 3 team. She played one season of 5v5 before joining with not much experience. She didn't even know how to dribble with her laces. Most of her teammates all played "together" in AYSO for a couple years. This is their first year in club as well. There was 4 girls on the team of 15 girls who knew how to play and the rest were recreation league status IMO. Two of them "were" definitely flight 2 status, 1 was possibly flight 1 worthy. My daughter started in the middle of the pack but was clearly the second best player on the team before the end of the season. Now that the season has ended, the two girls I mentioned previously that were at the top, along with 1 of the other decent players, left the team. The rest of the girls still seemed to be playing at the same skill level they started at, despite being together for years now. Currently, besides my daughter, there might be one of them that is flight 3 worthy and maybe one that is AYSO select worthy, but that's as good as it gets. I honestly don't think we will score a single goal this coming season. My daughter plays center back and already had her hands full this past year and I think its going to get worse for her (but im my eyes thats more experience). Most of the team doesn't do any outside training other than the 2 practices a week with the team. My daughter has 2 trainers and practices 3-5 days a week besides the 2 team practices. The coach is awesome and is an ex professional. He sees a lot of potential in my daughter and has asked her to start training with his 12yr old girls immediately after her regular practice and will get a couple minutes in a few games this upcoming season to help her develop faster( She also does private training with some of those girls too). He knows she has a desire to play college and professional so he's doing all he can to help her down that path. They are flight 1 and on the cusp of moving up to NPL. He said that in two years she will be on their team and to please trust him as he is aware of how bad the 2014 team is. But, it has my wife and I conflicted. I'm not all about the wins. I know the benefits of playing against worthy opponents and how that can help you excel. And although she's not getting that from her 2014 team, I feel she will get it from training with the 2012s. My wife Feels that she would be better off switching teams in hopes to get on a flight 2 team or at least a flight 3 that is competitive. She can't phantom the idea of having to stick it out 2 more years on this team , let alone 1. She also has a hard time having to spend so much money and travel to be on a team that will not be competitive, which I get. But I just feel the opportunity to play with older girls that are more competitive, is priceless. It's like she's getting a 2 for 1 deal, although she's just not getting the minutes in games with the 2012 girls. There's no guarantee we are going to find her a flight 2 team, nor a starting position. With her current team, she plays the entire game and that's experience in itself. Her left and right back will probably now have to move up to mid and striker to fill the other girl's spots, which is going to make her much more vulnerable in her position. And she's going to take a lickin but I think that's just gonna make her that much better. Again our team isn't very strong so I feel that there's going to be a lot of action on our side of the pitch, which in return, is a lot of learning and experience for my daughter. What do you guys think we should do?

I can see why it's a tough decision for you all. I'd be conflicted too.

A few questions:

1) Is she the type who will be affected by all the losses? Most are, parents and players. Having a season where you lose every game would be so discouraging even if my kid played the entire game. Mental aspects of the game are as important as developing technically and tactically I think and if she's the person who would let all the bad losses negatively impact her (as it would to almost all), I would think about that.

2) Does she continue to want to play CB only? I think it's fine if she does. I think it's okay to play CB on a slightly bad team as you're constantly pushed in that position. However, in build up play, CB is the first offensive player and if because no one else can connect the ball, she wouldn't be learning an important aspect of CB, initiating build up.

3) Are the 2013s at this club not good either? Instead of mainly playing on 2014s and then guesting on 2012s, can she mainly play on 2013s and then guest on 2012s? If 2013s are better than 2014s - which sounds like a safe assumption - I'd ask if that's possible. That sounds better than being stuck on this very bad 2014 team.
 
3-Whenever a coach tells me he will make sure my kid will go pro/D1, I just tune him out completely. Our U9 F1 team (undefeated in SoCal) had lots of ballers. By U12 only 2 of the original members still remain for one reason or another. No coach can guarantee a path to pro/D1.
I agree, this coach sounds sus if he is talking college/pro with a 2014 flight 3 player. He sounds like he's just desperate to keep her and not necessarily thinking of what's best for your daughter. Leave for a team/level that will push your player.
 
1-If your kid is "clearly" the 2nd best player on a F3 team, it's time to move up.
2-The whole 2012 dual training thing sounds very questionable. If your 2014 kid is good enough to hang with a 2012 F1 team, she should already be playing 2014 or 2013 F1. My guess is it has more to do with keeping you as a private client.
3-Whenever a coach tells me he will make sure my kid will go pro/D1, I just tune him out completely. Our U9 F1 team (undefeated in SoCal) had lots of ballers. By U12 only 2 of the original members still remain for one reason or another. No coach can guarantee a path to pro/D1.
4-You might consider separating your text into paragraphs. :)

Sorry to be so blunt, but these are my first impressions. Best of luck.
I agree with this. The other thing to consider is if enough of the "good" players leave, comparable people aren't recruited, and the team starts losing into the summer tournament season, the team blows up. Happens all the time with the youngers.
 
I can see why it's a tough decision for you all. I'd be conflicted too.

A few questions:

1) Is she the type who will be affected by all the losses? Most are, parents and players. Having a season where you lose every game would be so discouraging even if my kid played the entire game. Mental aspects of the game are as important as developing technically and tactically I think and if she's the person who would let all the bad losses negatively impact her (as it would to almost all), I would think about that.

2) Does she continue to want to play CB only? I think it's fine if she does. I think it's okay to play CB on a slightly bad team as you're constantly pushed in that position. However, in build up play, CB is the first offensive player and if because no one else can connect the ball, she wouldn't be learning an important aspect of CB, initiating build up.

3) Are the 2013s at this club not good either? Instead of mainly playing on 2014s and then guesting on 2012s, can she mainly play on 2013s and then guest on 2012s? If 2013s are better than 2014s - which sounds like a safe assumption - I'd ask if that's possible. That sounds better than being stuck on this very bad 2014 team.
1) she is mentally strong and is not effected by the losses. She is having fun win or lose.
2) she loves CB but besides that, she's the only one on the team that can play that position. The keeper is pretty bad and she saves a lot of goals.
3)There isn't a 2013 team in our area but I just found out they are trying to start one asap. They just need to get the details worked out. Flyer to go out soon.
 
I agree with this. The other thing to consider is if enough of the "good" players leave, comparable people aren't recruited, and the team starts losing into the summer tournament season, the team blows up. Happens all the time with

I would move her 100%. If she is at all competitive 2 more years of losing to "maybe" make the 2012s sounds rough and recipe for not having fun at all. My daughter is a 2014 and just switched teams. If you happen to be in South Orange County, message me if you want info about the team we picked (flight 2 but we picked it for the excellent coach).
The thing is she's having fun on both teams. My thought is let her get the experience practicing with the older girls who are much better, and then we take a look at this again at the end of this season. I feel the experience is invaluable, outweighs the bad, and will make her a better player regardless if she stays or leaves. But since my post, I found out that they are going to create a 2013 team what she will play on, and hopefully still get to practice with the 2012s.
 
1-If your kid is "clearly" the 2nd best player on a F3 team, it's time to move up.
2-The whole 2012 dual training thing sounds very questionable. If your 2014 kid is good enough to hang with a 2012 F1 team, she should already be playing 2014 or 2013 F1. My guess is it has more to do with keeping you as a private client.
3-Whenever a coach tells me he will make sure my kid will go pro/D1, I just tune him out completely. Our U9 F1 team (undefeated in SoCal) had lots of ballers. By U12 only 2 of the original members still remain for one reason or another. No coach can guarantee a path to pro/D1.
4-You might consider separating your text into paragraphs. :)
1-If your kid is "clearly" the 2nd best player on a F3 team, it's time to move up.
2-The whole 2012 dual training thing sounds very questionable. If your 2014 kid is good enough to hang with a 2012 F1 team, she should already be playing 2014 or 2013 F1. My guess is it has more to do with keeping you as a private client.
3-Whenever a coach tells me he will make sure my kid will go pro/D1, I just tune him out completely. Our U9 F1 team (undefeated in SoCal) had lots of ballers. By U12 only 2 of the original members still remain for one reason or another. No coach can guarantee a path to pro/D1.
4-You might consider separating your text into paragraphs. :)

Sorry to be so blunt, but these are my first impressions. Best of luck.

1-If your kid is "clearly" the 2nd best player on a F3 team, it's time to move up.
2-The whole 2012 dual training thing sounds very questionable. If your 2014 kid is good enough to hang with a 2012 F1 team, she should already be playing 2014 or 2013 F1. My guess is it has more to do with keeping you as a private client.
3-Whenever a coach tells me he will make sure my kid will go pro/D1, I just tune him out completely. Our U9 F1 team (undefeated in SoCal) had lots of ballers. By U12 only 2 of the original members still remain for one reason or another. No coach can guarantee a path to pro/D1.
4-You might consider separating your text into paragraphs. :)

Sorry to be so blunt, but these are my first impressions. Best of luck.

1-If your kid is "clearly" the 2nd best player on a F3 team, it's time to move up.
2-The whole 2012 dual training thing sounds very questionable. If your 2014 kid is good enough to hang with a 2012 F1 team, she should already be playing 2014 or 2013 F1. My guess is it has more to do with keeping you as a private client.
3-Whenever a coach tells me he will make sure my kid will go pro/D1, I just tune him out completely. Our U9 F1 team (undefeated in SoCal) had lots of ballers. By U12 only 2 of the original members still remain for one reason or another. No coach can guarantee a path to pro/D1.
4-You might consider separating your text into paragraphs. :)

Sorry to be so blunt, but these are my first impressions. Best of luck.
1- Yes I agree
2- She's good enough to practice with the 2012's but she isn't good enough to be on the team at this point. She has a lot to learn. Mostly strategy/tactics and being more aggressive/confident. I feel this is why he wants to give her a couple of years to train with them so she could learn these things at a faster rate. This coach has many clients so I don't think her 1 day of extra training with him is a factor if you meant he wanted her as a client for the money (she has another trainer she goes to other days). Over the holiday break, we would arrive early for Saturday practice and catch some of his training sessions with players from LAFC, Galaxy, Sounders, and some National Team players. Because of his clientele, I dont think it's about the $$$
3- He never guaranteed anything, only his guidance to help her as he seems to see something in here. I know a lot has to come from her as a player, and even then, there's no guarantee of success at any level.
4- It's a pain in butt to scroll back, correct typos, etc when using voice to text on my tiny screen, sorry.

No worries, I asked for your opinions. I appreciate your honesty.
 
Sorry this is a long post but I need some advice. I have a ten year old daughter who just completed her first year of club soccer on a flight 3 team. She played one season of 5v5 before joining with not much experience. She didn't even know how to dribble with her laces. Most of her teammates all played "together" in AYSO for a couple years. This is their first year in club as well. There was 4 girls on the team of 15 girls who knew how to play and the rest were recreation league status IMO. Two of them "were" definitely flight 2 status, 1 was possibly flight 1 worthy. My daughter started in the middle of the pack but was clearly the second best player on the team before the end of the season. Now that the season has ended, the two girls I mentioned previously that were at the top, along with 1 of the other decent players, left the team. The rest of the girls still seemed to be playing at the same skill level they started at, despite being together for years now. Currently, besides my daughter, there might be one of them that is flight 3 worthy and maybe one that is AYSO select worthy, but that's as good as it gets. I honestly don't think we will score a single goal this coming season. My daughter plays center back and already had her hands full this past year and I think its going to get worse for her (but im my eyes thats more experience). Most of the team doesn't do any outside training other than the 2 practices a week with the team. My daughter has 2 trainers and practices 3-5 days a week besides the 2 team practices. The coach is awesome and is an ex professional. He sees a lot of potential in my daughter and has asked her to start training with his 12yr old girls immediately after her regular practice and will get a couple minutes in a few games this upcoming season to help her develop faster( She also does private training with some of those girls too). He knows she has a desire to play college and professional so he's doing all he can to help her down that path. They are flight 1 and on the cusp of moving up to NPL. He said that in two years she will be on their team and to please trust him as he is aware of how bad the 2014 team is. But, it has my wife and I conflicted. I'm not all about the wins. I know the benefits of playing against worthy opponents and how that can help you excel. And although she's not getting that from her 2014 team, I feel she will get it from training with the 2012s. My wife Feels that she would be better off switching teams in hopes to get on a flight 2 team or at least a flight 3 that is competitive. She can't phantom the idea of having to stick it out 2 more years on this team , let alone 1. She also has a hard time having to spend so much money and travel to be on a team that will not be competitive, which I get. But I just feel the opportunity to play with older girls that are more competitive, is priceless. It's like she's getting a 2 for 1 deal, although she's just not getting the minutes in games with the 2012 girls. There's no guarantee we are going to find her a flight 2 team, nor a starting position. With her current team, she plays the entire game and that's experience in itself. Her left and right back will probably now have to move up to mid and striker to fill the other girl's spots, which is going to make her much more vulnerable in her position. And she's going to take a lickin but I think that's just gonna make her that much better. Again our team isn't very strong so I feel that there's going to be a lot of action on our side of the pitch, which in return, is a lot of learning and experience for my daughter. What do you guys think we should do?
Winning doesn't matter at her age. If they won Surf Cup tomorrow, nobody would know or care 6 months from now. If she's having fun and growing as a player, you're in the sweet spot. Everyone here, ahead of you, will tell you they had to look the other way over something along their journey. I would advise lots of futsal, which is amazing for improving footspeed and quick decision making, and not letting drama ruin everything. Playing with weaker players can be frustrating, as does never winning at that age, but you need to continuing having that conversation with her because so many things can kill a kid's love for the sport. I think she does, however, want to be on a better team within the next 2-3 years for multiple reasons. You get better training with better players 3 days a week.

If her coach is letting her play different positions and she doesn't hate him/her, you're already ahead of the game. And if the coaches are letting her play up, I love that, too, if she's physically able to handle the bigger players. However, every one of these douche bag coaches "played professionally" somewhere. Most of the time it was a 'semi-pro' pub team outside of Liverpool. It doesn't mean they can coach or inspire so don't read too much into that nonsense.

My $ .02
 
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