When the keeper makes a great pass, but players receive the ball with a hard touch that goes in a bad direction and results in a turnover that should be the fault of the player receiving the ball. Not great when the coach then yells don't play the ball into traffic. Then the reality of possession soccer becomes what is traffic. Someone on their back sure, traffic. 10 yards away, not traffic. That in between area becomes the discussion point, even more so when each field player has a different skill level.The point isn't that you can blame the coach for the distribution. The point is we don't know, especially in the OP's case, who get the blame. Everything is issue dependent. Is it the GK's footskills, is it the GK's soccer IQ, is it the coach's failure to instruct the GK on preferences, or is it the coach's failing to properly instruct the team on tactics (e.g. no one gets open)? The point is we have no idea. More often than not, it's a little of everything with different issues weighted differently, but YOU put it on the GK, and sent up this false dichotomy between the extremes of kids figure it out on their own and joystick coaching (neither of which is good).
Another aspect as they get older is the positioning of players which is the keepers responsibility as well. When some players don't listen, think they know better, or are to slow to react, a cross or pass to a wide open player results in a great shot attempt that shouldn't of even been a shot. It can be the difference between allowing 8 shots with 2 goals or allowing 4 shots and 1 goal.