So Cal Recruiting from 2010-2019

Justus said:
Deserved to play both. Figure out a way to help all girls play together, not divide.
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I’ve argued on here about the ridiculousness of DA (of which my kiddo is a member) and the HS soccer thing as well. What I’ve been able to come to grips with over the past 2 years, is that HS soccer means something different to EVERYONE! Not just me and my DD or you and yours. To DA’s credit, the initial rules DID allow for HS soccer and a return to DA status until 2021. The blame ultimately fell on the individual club DOC’s that enforced the the NO DA RETURN RULE early!! I was pissed. Because I, like you and many others, love HS sports and think it’s stupid to preclude them from participating. While I haven’t changed my position on this, I’m less inclined to be upset about it, personally. After all, life is full of choices and sacrifices to achieving ones goals. USSF just happened to create one for our kiddos that will take time to for us to come to grips with. Mine has always been a top tier player. ODP invites, Training Center invites (until she aged out) and has a true passion for the game. She reluctantly sacrificed HS soccer, as well as the other HS sports in which she was a Varsity letterman as a freshman, because she had to make that choice. Wasted energy looking back and saying it wasn’t worth it, just because she never got a YNT call. She did, however, grab something far more valuable.....a COLLEGE commitment (her ultimate goal in this journey). Ten years from now, she won’t look back with regret about missing a couple HS seasons. Hell, it may not take that long. So, my advise.....get over it. I did. Sometimes, achieving ones dreams, comes with sacrifice.
 
Justus said:
At the very least couldn't she have gotten one lousy waiver so she can play both HS Soccer with her new friends and the DA? She wanted to do both and that's my issue because she deserves it
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Well, that's your job to get that waiver. That's on you, not her. Here you are clucking like a little gallina for your failure to do so. Just be thankful and pray that she will be on the right path of getting good grades, staying away from trouble, and not getting hurt. You have done enough.
 
U13 United States Youth Soccer Championship run...………
With age change all set and playing for Surf it was still confusing for many players who were 04' in SoCal. Should they play up? Should she play her own age. We as parents look for DOCs to help us navigate in a very competitive arena. Players, with the help of their parents and DOCs are shooting to make the first U14 list that some say will come out sometime in the fall of 2017. DA announced first ages as 03/04, remember? At the time of all this, some clubs had "no play up allowed policies" and some "clubs allowed play ups" if you could compete Like Legends. Some clubs might "let parents dictate" play up as part of them coming to the club. We were honestly confused. Some DOCs were saying do ECNL 04', DA might not last. Some were saying DA is where you need to be and you should play up. Well, we went with Legends to try and make 03/04 combo team for first inaugural season. No promises were made except that your dd has potential but it must come with hard work. Sounds fair to me and a chance to help my dd which her dream. You don't make friends doing that either, let me tell you. Off to Legends. DA then announces single band 03 and 04 a month or so later. My dd saw a chance and confidently told me she wanted to go back to her friends to try and win a US Youth National Championship with them. Now I'm in a tough spot. I saw old coach and he said the girls would love to have her back and lets go win a championship. I had to tell Legends and I'm sure they weren't too happy. Plus TC were being run by DOCs. My dd only went to one TC in San Diego right before we went to Legends. Not invited back after we left. Not sure why. I'm sure through all this recruiting there is blame to go all around. It was a messy time for a lot of us.
 
Continued......…
The hardest part for me at this time was when high up folks and DOCs and others say things like, "Your a Club Hopper, no one likes a club hoper. This will hurt her college recruiting and so on." All to a dad whose kid is in 7th grade. I see how fast you get labeled in this industry and some even say, "you will get blacklisted." You feel trapped and cornered unlike anything you've experienced in sports, all because your trying to help your kid through a difficult arena non of us had gone through before. I'm not going to kiss up to DOC so I can get my kid up to the top. I don't know anything about how TCs are run today but the one in 2016 was not what my dd and I expected. Very sad experience :(
 
https://www.espn.com/soccer/united-soccer-leagues/story/3919297/adieuadu!-jacobs-youngest-to-sign-us-deal
I saw this article today and it was like a big giant soccer ball smacked me in the head and knocked me out of my CRAZY SOCCER PARENT RANT!!!
First of all, congrats to both 14 year olds. However, I see a major deference.
com·pe·ti·tion
"there is fierce competition between Teams"
synonyms: rivalry, competitiveness, vying, contesting, opposition, contention, conflict, feuding, battling, fighting, struggling, strife, war;
informalkeeping up with the Joneses
"I'm just not interested in competition"

I got way too competitive. My dd does not fit the DA and I was all mad about it. I will move along and get out of the way. My dd is gamer and she's wants to play games to win. I'm sorry everyone. Good night now!!!!
 
Justus said:
I got way too competitive. My dd does not fit the DA and I was all mad about it. I will move along and get out of the way.
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We can only hope you move along.

You are exactly the parent nobody wants to be on the sideline with, nor the parent that clubs and coaches want to deal with.

If you have 2 coaches or scouts or whatever analyzing your kid and another with similar skills, they are going to pick the one that doesn't have a crazy father like you. Simply not worth it.

Relax dude.
 
Justus said:
At the very least couldn't she have gotten one lousy waiver so she can play both HS Soccer with her new friends and the DA? She wanted to do both and that's my issue because she deserves it
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Why does she deserve a waiver?

Is she at a private school?
 
Elle Justus - thank you for sharing your story with us on this thread. Some of the other threads were confusing but this one is definitely helpful and informative to all of us on this forum. You're a dad who saw potential in his player and was swayed to take his child to different clubs because of coaches recruiting you and telling you it's better for your child to do so. In the end, you listened bc why would an experienced coach lie and steer a young child in the wrong direction? I think this is a lesson most of us have learned or will learn, bc in the name of "business & promotion", some coaches excuse themselves for screwing over children in the youth club soccer world. Then somehow...these coaches blame the parent and label them as club hoppers...even though the coaches are the ones who recruited your child over and promised a million things, then the coaches don't keep their promises. Parent leaves bc promises aren't kept, but Coach gets to label and ostracize a young child in order to defend his own reputation bc it's ok to screw a kid over to protect yourself and your program even though you're the one that broke your promise.

A lot of these winning coaches that advertise their winnings as development are like that...be careful out there...and listen to the whispers of the parents...it's probably true but most families don't say it publicly bc they're afraid of the consequences. You may not have dealt with it yet but you will down the road if for some reason. If it's in the best interest of the coach versus your child's best interest.

Parents buying the fake HS DA waivers should be exposed. Private Schools selling waivers should be exposed.

There are great parents and coaches out there who actually will do the right thing for the kids - no matter what.

EJ - your daughter sounds very talented and with continued dedication, she'll find a great soccer outcome...might not be exactly as you mapped out but the best things come as surprises. Can't wait to see where the future takes her and you on this roller coaster joy ride.
 
I dunno...I saw the posts as a guy thinking his daughter was The Chosen One at an early age and then ran smack head-on into reality that there are a lot of other good players out there. And then went into a rant how it's DA and every DOC's fault...cause God forbid that anything could be the fault of a parent.
 
Gotta give Justus credit, whether you liked, hated or tolerated his rants, he pumped some life into this rather dull forum of late!
 
Emma said:
Elle Justus - thank you for sharing your story with us on this thread. Some of the other threads were confusing but this one is definitely helpful and informative to all of us on this forum. You're a dad who saw potential in his player and was swayed to take his child to different clubs because of coaches recruiting you and telling you it's better for your child to do so. In the end, you listened bc why would an experienced coach lie and steer a young child in the wrong direction? I think this is a lesson most of us have learned or will learn, bc in the name of "business & promotion", some coaches excuse themselves for screwing over children in the youth club soccer world. Then somehow...these coaches blame the parent and label them as club hoppers...even though the coaches are the ones who recruited your child over and promised a million things, then the coaches don't keep their promises. Parent leaves bc promises aren't kept, but Coach gets to label and ostracize a young child in order to defend his own reputation bc it's ok to screw a kid over to protect yourself and your program even though you're the one that broke your promise.

A lot of these winning coaches that advertise their winnings as development are like that...be careful out there...and listen to the whispers of the parents...it's probably true but most families don't say it publicly bc they're afraid of the consequences. You may not have dealt with it yet but you will down the road if for some reason. If it's in the best interest of the coach versus your child's best interest.

Parents buying the fake HS DA waivers should be exposed. Private Schools selling waivers should be exposed.

There are great parents and coaches out there who actually will do the right thing for the kids - no matter what.

EJ - your daughter sounds very talented and with continued dedication, she'll find a great soccer outcome...might not be exactly as you mapped out but the best things come as surprises. Can't wait to see where the future takes her and you on this roller coaster joy ride.
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TY
 
2017, 2018, 2019......THE LIST, NC Showcase and The decision for HS Soccer...…...I will finish the recruiting story tonight. I am not Crazy soccer parent anymore. I think if some of us are honest we all can get a little cray cray sometimes. I'm not here to bash anyone. If I said something from past post I'm sorry. I was not drunk. I was manic I guess. I wanted some answers as a dad and a as customer who has devoted 9 years to the SoCal Youth Soccer Arena :)
 
I don't condone talking about your kid on a public forum---selfish, short-sighted, and lacking any morsel of good judgment. However, I will say this...with all of the changes that have occurred over the last 5 years in youth soccer--age groups, DA, DPL, CRL, ECNL, etc. etc.--how any parent/player could be deemed a "club hopper" is beyond me. You want families to stay at soccer clubs? Keep the youth soccer landscape consistent, reliable and predictable for 3-4 years in a row. That shouldn't be too much to ask.
 
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