Guest playng - best practices, your experiences, etc....

Mystery Train...thank you for all that you share!!! Always so very helpful! I never even thought I needed to check with the coach when my daughter guested.

We would never jump ship in the middle of our commitment (unless things were ridiculously bad) so I didn't even think about that. My daughter refuses to guest for whatever reason even though she has had the opportunity. She just started playing up 2 years right now so I am not pushing her on guesting because her confidence needs to increase to deal with this first challenge that I am always questioning whether she made the right decision or not. I think that bribery might work when the time is right to at least get her to experience it so she knows what the experience will provide her and to see if she likes it or not. If I didn't push my daughter to go down the slide at the lake (massive judgement from parents all around too) when she was 7, she would have never seen the enjoyment that caused her to want to do it over and over again. I knew that but all of the judging spectators didn't! I am thinking pushing to guest is the same thing. I wouldn't do it with her kicking and screaming but bribing sounds good initially so she can at least see if she likes it or not.

A poster talked about loyalty...I am big on loyalty but......I learned in my career at a Big 4 accounting firm where they burn and churn much like Club Soccer, and always shared with the young driven team of people that I was responsible for mentoring..."Look for what the firm has to offer you and suck them dry on those experiences. When they stop providing you a benefit with your own goals (including happiness), it is time for you to look for other opportunities because that is exactly how they look at you. Mutual benefit is the goal. Now lets talk about your goals and how we can help you meet those goals." It would be pretty cool if coaches would ask the same thing which would help with loyalty and retention of players but I realized over a year ago that was a pipe dream in the Club Soccer world. I had to lower my expectations and find my own way of helping my daughter define and achieve her goals which includes loyalty/commitment in the short term.

Just love this Goalkeeper forum. You all provide such great information. I wish there was a mentoring program of high school Keepers mentoring youth Keepers but this forum is a great alternative!
 
So this past weekend we took the spot posted here looking for a guest GK for West Coast/OC Surf Tournament with San Diego United G03-Black. GK was recovering from a knee injury. What a great weekend. Weather was great...a bit warm but a breeze at times which was nice. You could see the Holy Fire blow up from our chairs at OC Great Park. Night game was a nice change of pace considering it's summer. Lights and cooler temps.

San Diego United. What can I say. What a team. Played great possession soccer. Girls were great and very welcoming. Coach and Team Mgr. were good people. Parents were very appreciative of us helping as well. Tough bracket. In group play they beat Real SoCal 3-0. Against CDA Slammers-Whittier/Alvarez drew 0-0..same thing against OC Surf DA Pilot..0-0. That put us in a 3-way tie for the wild card spot. But 3 clean sheets put us ahead and into the semi-finals. My GK had a good weekend..and some big saves!! A few mistakes here and there. But not bad overall when you consider she only met them 1hr before their first game. In the semi-finals they lost to LA Breakers ECNL 0-1. SDU girls busted their butts out there. Have yet to see a harder working bunch of girls. A very hard-fought game. But they played that way all weekend. Always hustling for every ball. A very well-coached team. A foul near the by-line gave Breakers a free kick which they converted. Unlucky. Otherwise it probably would've gone to PK's. An overall great weekend came to a close.

Here's the best part. After that last game as the girls were all walking back to the parent's sideline..my DD was walking across the field by herself towards us. My wife was talking to one of her sisters who came to watch the game..I tapped her on the shoulder.
"Look..that's the SD United parents clapping and cheering and thanking her!!" A few even called her by name. My wife and I were speechless.
She waved back to all of them and thanked them as well. I don't think I'll ever forget this one. What a class act by SD United!!
Thanks for a great weekend of soccer!!
 
Mystery Train said:
It depends on what your motivations are for finding guest playing opportunities outside your own club. In no particular order, these might be:
a) Get more playing time because there isn't enough with your club
b) Thinking of leaving the club in the future, need to check out other clubs to evaluate options
c) Exposure to a higher level of play than available at your club
d) Chance to play at a showcase tournament that your club is not participating in

It sounds like there are plenty of A, if you've already guested twice in the last two weeks. So if it is b, c, or d, you should probably gain her agreement that these things are necessary in order for her to achieve whatever goal she has with soccer. If her goal is to just play lots, get better and have fun, then I wouldn't worry about guest playing at other clubs if she's getting all of that at her own club. In my DD's case, she just didn't have enough opportunities for advancement within her first club. She got pigeon-holed at the u-little ages as a B-team level player, mainly because she was a late bloomer. We didn't know much better, and assumed our club had her evaluated accurately. When she guest played for teams who were competing at a higher level than our club's A team, the coaches for those clubs recruited her hard, and we realized that maybe our club was doing her a disservice. Sure enough, her opportunities blossomed when she left. But our situation may not be equivalent to yours, so don't assume that guest playing for another club will end up producing better results in the long run. It did for us, but it's important for your kid and you to be on the same page about the reasons. Is she content with her playing time and her growth at her current club?
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This was a very helpful thread. She did finally guest play elsewhere. @Mystery Train I asked all your questions, then asked her the same questions. The answer for me to your questions was E - all of the above. The opportunity and experience was very good, and I think opened her eyes, which is all we were trying to achieve at the end of the day. Thanks again for all your constructive feedback.
 
mulliganmom said:
This was a very helpful thread. She did finally guest play elsewhere. @Mystery Train I asked all your questions, then asked her the same questions. The answer for me to your questions was E - all of the above. The opportunity and experience was very good, and I think opened her eyes, which is all we were trying to achieve at the end of the day. Thanks again for all your constructive feedback.
Click to expand...
Absolutely! Glad to hear it went well and that she got to expand on her playing experience; so good for building self confidence. Happy to pass on helpful information from all our ups and downs! Good luck to her!
 
We guest played at the West Coast/OC tournament as well at the 05 level. Might get to guest play with the same team at Blues Cup over labor day. This was the 2nd go around with the team and easy to see some friendships building. She has played well, but has seemed to play more conservative, staying on her line a bit more. With her last game vs the winner of the tournament she got aggressive, playing off her line multiple times, making plays outside the 18, and shutting them out.

I was wondering what the reaction is for keepers that struggled with the team they guest played with. Whether it be a bad day, some bad breaks, or the defense breaks down.
 
socalkdg said:
We guest played at the West Coast/OC tournament as well at the 05 level. Might get to guest play with the same team at Blues Cup over labor day. This was the 2nd go around with the team and easy to see some friendships building. She has played well, but has seemed to play more conservative, staying on her line a bit more. With her last game vs the winner of the tournament she got aggressive, playing off her line multiple times, making plays outside the 18, and shutting them out.

I was wondering what the reaction is for keepers that struggled with the team they guest played with. Whether it be a bad day, some bad breaks, or the defense breaks down.
Click to expand...
My kid once had the mother of all bad days for a team she was guesting for in a showcase. In fact, she had two bad days, letting high bounces go over her head for goals not once but twice. So bad that I could hear parents on the sidelines saying things like, "Get that girl out of there!" Needless to say, they never called again. She was depressed for about 48 hours. But she owned it, and kept on working. The biggest issue was that she developed some pregame and in game anxiety/nerves after that which took her a while to get past. I'm not sure it was entirely related to that incident. But in hindsight, she recognizes today that her bad weekend was a blessing in disguise. For one, she'll never misjudge a bounce like that again. Two, that team was checking her out as a potential player for them. Had that weekend gone well, she would have taken the spot and missed out on the guest play opportunity that led to her current (much better) team. Every experience can be made into a positive with the right attitude. We like to say in our house, "You win some, you learn some." That day she learned some.
 
socalkdg said:
We guest played at the West Coast/OC tournament as well at the 05 level. Might get to guest play with the same team at Blues Cup over labor day. This was the 2nd go around with the team and easy to see some friendships building. She has played well, but has seemed to play more conservative, staying on her line a bit more. With her last game vs the winner of the tournament she got aggressive, playing off her line multiple times, making plays outside the 18, and shutting them out.

I was wondering what the reaction is for keepers that struggled with the team they guest played with. Whether it be a bad day, some bad breaks, or the defense breaks down.
Click to expand...
Last weekend my daughter guest played and I saw the normal pattern for her:
Game 1 - Ok. Nothing special and a so-so warm up,
Game 2 - Better but still not playing at the top of her game,
Game 3 - Quality game that I would call an A but not her best,
Game 4 - (Finals) best game of the tournament. 2 balls punched over. Highly talkative to the D. Comfortable in net. Lost 0-1, but could have gone either way and I think she helped keep the team in it.
My daughter seems to get more comfortable with each game. The other players and parents were appreciative. It helps that she knew some of the players. My goal would for her to play as well in games 1-3 as she does in game 4. It is all ab out the mental part. Good luck to you and your kid.
 
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