Positive Style: "Bobby, I really like the way you share the ball with the other team."
LOL
Positive Style: "Bobby, I really like the way you share the ball with the other team."
This is unreal, at least I wish it was. Thanks for sharing. I'll include this quote from the news article to accompany the shocking stuff you added. "Les Armstrong, 45, forged his (a kid's) name to get him off the team." Banned for 5 months and yet here he is, back coaching and getting paid handsomely as girls director. Awful.
Thanks for sharing.
#Nefutous I think you were talking to #Bananacorner I do not know anything about this topic.@BananaKick It would be nice to know the club and the specific allegations. Who knows, this could be an extreme situation so that all the comments above are way off the mark. Apples and oranges?
I agree with you on the merit. My response would be that there is only so many facts a parent can bring to the table. There is no true way to provide proof or evidence of anything on the forum. There is no smoking gun or illicit documents or thumb drives containing wire transfers, dirty pictures, etc. Most of if not all of what is posted comes from first hand information. Sometimes it is phrased as second hand to further protect identities but it is always a personal issue. If for example another poster can add to or refute a claim than that is fine as the dialogue is further advanced. But what seems to be happening is that denier has no more knowledge or evidence of anything and is merely being a club soccer system protector. I’m not saying it’s you personally. We can agree to disagree and that’s the point. My philosophy is that even mistated or mistaken information has a certain amount of truth to it. That truth is usuful and yes it should be debated but not shouted down. Clubs, coaches, leagues, do not need more protection or benefit of the doubt. They will survive and need to be questioned more not less. Rather than us parents always having to provide clean factual information how about the clubs do it, the league does it, or the coach. They don’t, because they know how to divide and segregate parents. I have soccer nightmares, I can’t sleep so I read this forum all night. Boys and girls side, its just something I’ve noticed...that there’s more now than before supporting the club rather than the parent poster.Nutmeg, I think you have it wrong. People like me are not "contrarian" just because we demand factual and evidence-based posting when it comes to accusing coaches of sex crimes, bullying, retaliation, and the other matters you raised. Coaches who do these things are not to be tolerated.
The problem is that many posters raising these issues is that they are usually outraged about whatever the situation is. They are often disorganized in their factual presentation, or they misstate facts and make false assumptions. They often provide highly-charged, and often unwarranted opinions as part of their presentation. Only very rarely are vetted facts presented. So it is impossible for a careful reader to validate their highly-charged claims.
And then you get people, like Smellycleats, who have a personal beef with somebody, bordering upon an obsession, trying to connect every possible problem with the incident that happened years ago between their daughter and another parent on the team. (The Eagles did not slap down a parent who was obnoxious to my daughter, therefore the Eagles knew about a coach's improper relationship with a player on one of their teams, although nobody else knew, and nobody told them about it.)
Requesting factual and evidentiary support is not "contrarian," and is not meant to support wrongdoers. It is meant to obtain sufficient information to make an informed opinion as to the claims raised.
Sorry, one too many bananas on my mind. Fixed it.#Nefutous I think you were talking to #Bananacorner I do not know anything about this topic.
Not to go off on a tangent but since the formation of DA, I have noticed an increased pattern of off the field issues being posting on this board of issues that parents are currently navigating, that are legit concerns. These include Minor sex crimes, improper communication with children, coach and club bullying, retaliation by coaches, club failure to communicate or warn parents of improper or illegal behavior, etc. The frequency of these posts is alarming. What concerns me more is that with every post of improper behavior there are those that seek to always be contrarian. Very rarely do they defend the act but rather they marginalize the posters as club bashing lunatics who are posting fake news for some evil agenda. Sure your DD was used as a sexual fantasy by a grown ass man but it’s not that bad cause she was almost 18! No clubs don’t have to warn parents they hired a sex predator because the law says they don’t have too so stop talking about it. It’s ok to call a girl a lazy cun. Because kids are soft and he’s just motivating her.
I guess my question is why? If it’s bullshi. Most will know on here and call it out, but that’s not the case in most instances. Most are issues that we need to discuss openly.
I believe the greatest trick in club soccer is how clubs can play parents against each other, intentionally and unintentionally to their benefit.
You’ve been the valley too long dude. I never said bashing. My point is that far too often the conversation that’s needs to be had about anything off the field gets hijacked by those who relate everything back to their own experiences. I’m not talking to you individually intentioned I was not just referring to this thread, I don’t know you or your kid. You are literally making my point for me. I posted that this forum and what people post on it should be debated and discussed. I don’t know each poster and their motives. I don’t know if they are lying or not. What I do want is to have the larger discussion of the topic, any topic. Why are you so irritated? Really, nothing I wrote is that bad. It’s just have the debate. When the current climate is rife with sexualized behavior by adults with young athletes and coaches are either accused of or someone has a experience related to that topic with SoCal soccer, It should be discussed, here. I and many on here can tell of times our kids or teammates were verbally abused, yelled at stories of players crying, forced to quit, illicit texting and emails from coaches. It’s out there. But if parents feel they can’t post that because others ask for facts or proof and belittle that than all we are left with is conformity. When we need more skepticism of everything. Whether or not the facts fit your definition of what is and shouldn’t be mentioned is pointless. Not everyone on here cares about what inside knowledge people have of each post.What are you talking about? The original poster apparently lied about a lawsuit for what appears, in retrospect, to be a sales pitch for someone’s book, or so they could get some attention. That they made up a fake lawsuit in which a fake club’s fake coach is fake-ly accused of causing girls PTSD is the very definition of a “club bashing lunatic”, don’t you think? Seriously, if you want to present a “what if” hypothetical for discussion of how a club should handle a problem coach, don’t present it as a serious lawsuit against a DA club that is allowing its coach to cause PTSD to young girls. It is also worth noting that the only actual coach accused of wrongdoing in this thread - the AZ coach - has not been defended by anyone, which does not support your theory.
I know you mean well, but I don’t think you realize who is doing the “bashing” here. You are criticizing people who were skeptical - for good reason it turns out - because they sought factual support and failed to take what turned out to be a lie at face value. In support of your position, you (ironically) attempted to marginalize their legitimate concerns by equating them to alleged posters who as best I can tell don’t exist, but whom you claim go around saying it it ok for coaches to call girls lazy c**ts and who defend child molesters. And who, exactly, is the coach treating my daughter as a sexual fantasy? And which club knew or should have known they hired a sexual predator? If you want to discuss serious issues openly and honestly, the first thing that needs to happen is to stop making things up.
Long live the skeptics.
Positive Style: "Bobby, I really like the way you share the ball with the other team. You are very close to earning a spot on our G2008 Cotillion squad."
You’ve been the valley too long dude. I never said bashing. My point is that far too often the conversation that’s needs to be had about anything off the field gets hijacked by those who relate everything back to their own experiences. I’m not talking to you individually intentioned I was not just referring to this thread, I don’t know you or your kid. You are literally making my point for me. I posted that this forum and what people post on it should be debated and discussed. I don’t know each poster and their motives. I don’t know if they are lying or not. What I do want is to have the larger discussion of the topic, any topic. Why are you so irritated? Really, nothing I wrote is that bad. It’s just have the debate. When the current climate is rife with sexualized behavior by adults with young athletes and coaches are either accused of or someone has a experience related to that topic with SoCal soccer, It should be discussed, here. I and many on here can tell of times our kids or teammates were verbally abused, yelled at stories of players crying, forced to quit, illicit texting and emails from coaches. It’s out there. But if parents feel they can’t post that because others ask for facts or proof and belittle that than all we are left with is conformity. When we need more skepticism of everything. Whether or not the facts fit your definition of what is and shouldn’t be mentioned is pointless. Not everyone on here cares about what inside knowledge people have of each post.
Again nothing I said I bad. I just said more debate that’s it. Clearly we have a breakdown in understanding. So I will type using smaller words for you. I don’t know Baker, don’t know Clinton. And I don’t know What the F your talking about or why your a dick. Maybe you didn’t get enough hugs from your parents. If you believe that youth soccer is all rainbows and sunshine and no kid is subject to Asshat coaches and clubs doing weird and borderline stuff with players than great for you. Clearly our experiences have been different. I heard AYSO is super chill so no wonder. You like Facts, here’s one for you. Next time your DD makes a national team training lmk and we can talk about this further. Til then A hole.The current climate is rife with sexualized behavior? Sure,
there is the occasional bad actor in every profession, but really? So now there a deep state of sexual predators in youth club soccer? A pizzagate tunnel between Blues and Slammers so that Clinton, er Baker, can cause little girls PTSD?
I’m totally happy to discuss facts, if you can ever point one out. Let’s discuss one of these illicit texts or emails, for example. If they’re real and as nefarious as you say, don’t you have an obligation to tell people lest other children get subjected to similar nefariousness? Let’s expose these deep staters once and for all. Maybe we can finally prove that Baker and Obama eat children when no one is looking.
Again nothing I said I bad. I just said more debate that’s it. Clearly we have a breakdown in understanding. So I will type using smaller words for you. I don’t know Baker, don’t know Clinton. And I don’t know What the F your talking about or why your a dick. Maybe you didn’t get enough hugs from your parents. If you believe that youth soccer is all rainbows and sunshine and no kid is subject to Asshat coaches and clubs doing weird and borderline stuff with players than great for you. Clearly our experiences have been different. I heard AYSO is super chill so no wonder. You like Facts, here’s one for you. Next time your DD makes a national team training lmk and we can talk about this further. Til then A hole.
Shame on him for his actions and shame on US Soccer for giving him the only DA in Arizona. Best case is US Soccer failed to do any due diligence or worst case they ignored the evidence against this guy. It really calls into question the competence and/or integrity of the USSDA.
You are right about blaming US Soccer fro giving him the only DA in Arizona but how about the parents that allowed him to abuse their kids.
How about Shame on the parents to say " Well, it's DA so let;'s just have him bully our kids?". Wait, this kind of happened with the gymnastics coach.. We always blame others but never ourselves.
Locally a few year back there was a coach that was very good but would make kids cry by yelling (screaming) in the middle of the games. The team split up and a new coach emerged and moved to a new club. The screamer coach tried to regroup but only lasted 1 more year as a coach. Basically the parents in the area had heard about his antics and decided to not take their kids to that team.
Bottom line, parents can have some control to take some of these idiots away from soccer.
This behavior should not be tolerated. Regardless of the sex of the coach or the athlete. In any sport - ever. I, like most of you, have seen the football coach losing his mind on a player (pop warner or collegiate), the arena soccer coach who acts like he is coaching in the world cup, and on and on. WE have to demand better from the coaches. WE have to be willing to step in when the lines are crossed. Yes, life is tough and many a days as a grown up you get your teeth kicked in and have to get up, dust yourself off and keep going, but that isn't an excuse for deplorable behavior. WE need to demand better. On the pitch, in the classroom, in the board room. This isn't acceptable behavior, and WE need to be the ones to make it stop. Not to mention the negative impact on performance. Expect more/demand more.
Agreed. Parents should speak up. But the minute you say a word, or even ask a question, your child is in jeopardy of punishment-further abuse, benched, or kicked off the team and you are labelled the jerk. Your reputation follows you. For the most part, Clubs side with coaches, not parents, even in the most extreme cases as we have read about lately. For every parent who complains, there are two willing to make a donation. It's a twisted world.
Currently we luckily have found great coaches for our kids so do not have this problem ourselves. But that is a good suggestion for those who haven’t. But mostly you just leave and seek out the great coaches. my point being, it’s difficult and mostly pointless to speak up.Video tape it. Then take it to club. Then bump it up to next level if need be.