ALERT!! Be Advised about this Control Freak Jacob Tudela Coach!

@Control Freak I am sorry you and your kid had a bad experience with Tudela. I have come to the conclusion that if you are around long enough in youth sports you will have a story of your kid getting hurt/cut/mistreated/etc..., it just seems to be par for the course with youth sports. Maybe you came on the forum to vent, maybe you came on the forum to offer a true warning of what you experienced, maybe you were hoping that others would confirm your thoughts about the coach/club. But what is working against you is the following:
1 - You are a brand new member and came out with the guns firing,
2 - You used the words "ignorant," "coward," "bad rap" and "I heard..." (you are going to get push back when you start name calling and spreading rumors),
3 - you made specific reference to a geographic area in a negative way (US5 @ Norwalk),
4 - you complained about the lack of yellow and red cards (most would argue that is isn't a foul until the ref calls it),
5 - you made the mistake of thinking that all of the posters care about rankings and specifically for a 2007 team (no one really cares about rankings - at least whats what we tell ourselves)
Most posters would/will:
1 - Encourage you to find the right coach (not club) for your kid,
2 - Be sympathetic to your kid's situation (if the rhetoric was toned down a little),
3 - Recommend you minimize the name calling & calling out specific geographic areas,
4-Wish your kid nothing but good luck and success in their soccer journey.

Good luck to you and your kid. I hope you find the right coach and environment for her to thrive. Take a breath, and be very cautious of posting when you are mad (trust me).
 
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MyDaughtersAKeeper said:
@Control Freak I am sorry you and your kid had a bad experience with Tudela. I have come to the conclusion that if you are around long enough in youth sports you will have a story of your kid getting hurt/cut/mistreated/etc..., it just seems to be par for the course with youth sports. Maybe you came on the forum to vent, maybe you came on the forum to offer a true warning of what you experienced, maybe you were hoping that others would confirm your thoughts about the coach/club. But what is working again you is the following:
1 - You are a brand new member and came out with the guns firing,
2 - You used the words "ignorant," "coward," "bad rap" and "I heard..." (you are going to get push back when you start name calling and spreading rumors),
3 - you made specific reference to a geographic area in a negative way (US5 @ Norwalk),
4 - you complained about the lack of yellow and red cards (most would argue that is isn't a foul until the ref calls it),
5 - you made the mistake in thinking that all of the posters care about rankings and specifically for a 2007 team (no one really cares about rankings - at least whats what we tell ourselves)
Most posters would/will:
1 - Encourage you to find the right coach (not club) for your kid,
2 - Be sympathetic to your kid's situation (if the rhetoric was toned down a little),
3 - Recommend you minimize the name calling & calling out specific geographic areas,
4-Wish your kid nothing but good luck and success in their soccer journey.

Good luck to you and your kid. I hope you find the right coach and environment for her to thrive. Take a breath, and be very cautious of posting when you are mad (trust me).
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Dude! Deep! :D
 
MyDaughtersAKeeper said:
@Control Freak I am sorry you and your kid had a bad experience with Tudela. I have come to the conclusion that if you are around long enough in youth sports you will have a story of your kid getting hurt/cut/mistreated/etc..., it just seems to be par for the course with youth sports. Maybe you came on the forum to vent, maybe you came on the forum to offer a true warning of what you experienced, maybe you were hoping that others would confirm your thoughts about the coach/club. But what is working again you is the following:
1 - You are a brand new member and came out with the guns firing,
2 - You used the words "ignorant," "coward," "bad rap" and "I heard..." (you are going to get push back when you start name calling and spreading rumors),
3 - you made specific reference to a geographic area in a negative way (US5 @ Norwalk),
4 - you complained about the lack of yellow and red cards (most would argue that is isn't a foul until the ref calls it),
5 - you made the mistake in thinking that all of the posters care about rankings and specifically for a 2007 team (no one really cares about rankings - at least whats what we tell ourselves)
Most posters would/will:
1 - Encourage you to find the right coach (not club) for your kid,
2 - Be sympathetic to your kid's situation (if the rhetoric was toned down a little),
3 - Recommend you minimize the name calling & calling out specific geographic areas,
4-Wish your kid nothing but good luck and success in their soccer journey.

Good luck to you and your kid. I hope you find the right coach and environment for her to thrive. Take a breath, and be very cautious of posting when you are mad (trust me).
Click to expand...
Great logic and well said.
 
MyDaughtersAKeeper said:
@Control Freak I am sorry you and your kid had a bad experience with Tudela. I have come to the conclusion that if you are around long enough in youth sports you will have a story of your kid getting hurt/cut/mistreated/etc..., it just seems to be par for the course with youth sports. Maybe you came on the forum to vent, maybe you came on the forum to offer a true warning of what you experienced, maybe you were hoping that others would confirm your thoughts about the coach/club. But what is working against you is the following:
1 - You are a brand new member and came out with the guns firing,
2 - You used the words "ignorant," "coward," "bad rap" and "I heard..." (you are going to get push back when you start name calling and spreading rumors),
3 - you made specific reference to a geographic area in a negative way (US5 @ Norwalk),
4 - you complained about the lack of yellow and red cards (most would argue that is isn't a foul until the ref calls it),
5 - you made the mistake of thinking that all of the posters care about rankings and specifically for a 2007 team (no one really cares about rankings - at least whats what we tell ourselves)
Most posters would/will:
1 - Encourage you to find the right coach (not club) for your kid,
2 - Be sympathetic to your kid's situation (if the rhetoric was toned down a little),
3 - Recommend you minimize the name calling & calling out specific geographic areas,
4-Wish your kid nothing but good luck and success in their soccer journey.

Good luck to you and your kid. I hope you find the right coach and environment for her to thrive. Take a breath, and be very cautious of posting when you are mad (trust me).
Click to expand...


Short version.... GET IN WHERE YOU FIT IN!!!!! :)
 
MyDaughtersAKeeper said:
@Control Freak I am sorry you and your kid had a bad experience with Tudela. I have come to the conclusion that if you are around long enough in youth sports you will have a story of your kid getting hurt/cut/mistreated/etc..., it just seems to be par for the course with youth sports. Maybe you came on the forum to vent, maybe you came on the forum to offer a true warning of what you experienced, maybe you were hoping that others would confirm your thoughts about the coach/club. But what is working against you is the following:
1 - You are a brand new member and came out with the guns firing,
2 - You used the words "ignorant," "coward," "bad rap" and "I heard..." (you are going to get push back when you start name calling and spreading rumors),
3 - you made specific reference to a geographic area in a negative way (US5 @ Norwalk),
4 - you complained about the lack of yellow and red cards (most would argue that is isn't a foul until the ref calls it),
5 - you made the mistake of thinking that all of the posters care about rankings and specifically for a 2007 team (no one really cares about rankings - at least whats what we tell ourselves)
Most posters would/will:
1 - Encourage you to find the right coach (not club) for your kid,
2 - Be sympathetic to your kid's situation (if the rhetoric was toned down a little),
3 - Recommend you minimize the name calling & calling out specific geographic areas,
4-Wish your kid nothing but good luck and success in their soccer journey.

Good luck to you and your kid. I hope you find the right coach and environment for her to thrive. Take a breath, and be very cautious of posting when you are mad (trust me).
Click to expand...

Well said....

But being new to the board I have to ask. Do people really get this worked up over a u-11 team? SMH they are 10 and 11 year old little girls. There will not be quality soccer played at this age and certainly not at this level....... Move on and be more concerned about your kid having fun.
 
Control Freak said:
@espola and @Desert Hound.. Nope that's not the case we were on roster and my kid is not going to play in this environment with these people.
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I was made aware of this thread this morning and had decided to ignore it; the community weighed in quickly and accurately. But I did want to put something on the record. I'll show you the courtesy that you didn't show Jacob and not share your real name on this forum, or the text of your email of "Futbol Club Desires and Expectations" that prompted an internal discussion about whether you would be a good fit for our club.

We're a new club, built on principles of great soccer, empowering girls, diversity, and inclusiveness; and over all of that, trying to do things "the right way." Now that last bit means something different to everyone, but for us it's usually about going for as much integrity and as little drama as possible. That applies to our coaches and players, but also (because they are an intrinsic part of the youth sports equation) to our parents. It seemed very clear from your initial email that you would have trouble meeting those expectations, and further due diligence (talking to parents at prior clubs you had been a part of) confirmed that.

Jacob communicated that you as politely as possible, respectful of the fact that your... enthusiasm came from a good place: you love your daughter. I get it; I love mine. You made another appeal; it was, again, politely turned down. I'm sorry you felt that the Director was then obligated to get on the phone with you to explain something that you clearly wouldn't accept or understand.

A lot of people would have left it at that. You chose to open an anonymous account and post lies (libel, technically) on a message board. Again, fortunately, this is a pretty savvy crowd, and even the folks who don't know Jacob or our club got a sense of what really went down. But here's the thing: what you did showed a lot of drama and not much integrity. So I still feel very comfortable with our decision.

I also feel sympathy for your daughter, who I'm sure is a fantastic kid, who has no idea what opportunities her (well-intentioned) dad is costing her. Before you fire off the inevitable hit job on me, you may want to take a beat and think about that. Best of luck to you and to her.

Kirk
 
KJR said:
I was made aware of this thread this morning and had decided to ignore it; the community weighed in quickly and accurately. But I did want to put something on the record. I'll show you the courtesy that you didn't show Jacob and not share your real name on this forum, or the text of your email of "Futbol Club Desires and Expectations" that prompted an internal discussion about whether you would be a good fit for our club.

We're a new club, built on principles of great soccer, empowering girls, diversity, and inclusiveness; and over all of that, trying to do things "the right way." Now that last bit means something different to everyone, but for us it's usually about going for as much integrity and as little drama as possible. That applies to our coaches and players, but also (because they are an intrinsic part of the youth sports equation) to our parents. It seemed very clear from your initial email that you would have trouble meeting those expectations, and further due diligence (talking to parents at prior clubs you had been a part of) confirmed that.

Jacob communicated that you as politely as possible, respectful of the fact that your... enthusiasm came from a good place: you love your daughter. I get it; I love mine. You made another appeal; it was, again, politely turned down. I'm sorry you felt that the Director was then obligated to get on the phone with you to explain something that you clearly wouldn't accept or understand.

A lot of people would have left it at that. You chose to open an anonymous account and post lies (libel, technically) on a message board. Again, fortunately, this is a pretty savvy crowd, and even the folks who don't know Jacob or our club got a sense of what really went down. But here's the thing: what you did showed a lot of drama and not much integrity. So I still feel very comfortable with our decision.

I also feel sympathy for your daughter, who I'm sure is a fantastic kid, who has no idea what opportunities her (well-intentioned) dad is costing her. Before you fire off the inevitable hit job on me, you may want to take a beat and think about that. Best of luck to you and to her.

Kirk
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Dam!
 
KJR- thanks for the clarification of this matter. The voice of reason emerged. Though I was curious when you were going to step in. ;)
 
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Control Freak - We have all been there - worked up about a coach or club or DOC and often with legitimate complaints. But then you have families and players down the sideline are loving the coach and the club. You have to take a few deep breaths, do some yoga, look for the annoying coach and club that fits for your DD and you as a parent, then sit back and let her play. It is often best to move on to an environment that you like and fits for you rather than doing battle. Your daughter will be happier and progress in her skills and development. As many have said on this forum, it will be over before you know it and you don't want to look back with regret about not having enjoyed the ride.
 
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