We were offered spots on other San Diego clubs or parents whose kids were on those clubs suggested out boys were good enough to be on "real teams". We politely turned those aside and I didn't complain when my older son decided he wanted to abandon his long-time teammates to play with his school buddies on a neighboring club's BU15 team, a level higher in the Presidio brackets and a year up for him. The nastiness didn't really start until high school years. Club coaches can say anything; college coaches are constrained by NCAA regulations but can still be offensive in other ways, such as pointing out how much more prestige there would be playing at their almost-Ivy college instead of one of those State schools.
Yes, facts can be offensive sometimes. Truly nasty.