Girls soccer & moving to other sports

L

Lou789

SILVER
Do girls leave soccer for another sport typically around 6th-7th grade? I see a lot leaving to play volleyball. Why is that? From having played volleyball myself it’s such a different sport - doesn’t give you nearly the same workout as soccer. And it’s much more boring to watch and even to play.

Why do some girls stop playing soccer even if they are good? Is it too physical?
 
If it's not fun relative to other options, kids will leave. Options for other forms of fun open up - other sports or otherwise. Some no longer find the on and off field team dynamics of soccer to be fun. The more fun the team is having on and off the field, the more likely the girls will stay around longer.

Things can change rapidly, seemingly over night during this age.
 
The only soccer player I knew of that went to volleyball mostly did it because the dad burnt bridges with everyone he met. Eventually this landed the kid on a not so good team. After a couple of seasons the grind got to be too much and I'm sure the dad made things awful so they quit soccer.

The mom was a volleyball player in college so I think she took over sports interactions and got her kid involved with volleyball.

Ive heard competitive volleyball is a lot like soccer. Lots of expensive tournaments + travel.
 
Lou789 said:
Why do some girls stop playing soccer even if they are good? Is it too physical?
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Boys are a big reason and going out with friends instead of 24/7 soccer 12 months out of the year. It takes a toll on the body and some just hate the grind. I heard about one the best SoCal has ever produced and in 9th grade she told her old man in less than 10 minutes, "I have a boyfriend daddy" and "I quit soccer."
 
Not specific for girls, but soccer tends to become a lot more dangerous around the HS level, in my experience (several significant injuries to players when I was playing in HS). My son is currently in 8th, and playing both soccer and VB... and I would not be surprised or disappointed if his focus shifted to VB in HS. On the boys side, it's also far less crowded; in his case, he's probably equally talented for both sports, but where in soccer this lands him on a mid-tier club team and a bench player on the school soccer team, he can be a top player for school VB.

I would speculate that middle school, and going into HS, is around the time when kids are able and encouraged to explore activities beyond just what their parent put them in, and when they will start moving away from things they don't actually like (but are doing to appease their parents). This is going to pull a lot of kids out of soccer organically (soccer being one of the sports a lot of parents push kids into these days).

Another factor, just for reference: late MS and early HS is also when kids (and parents) start asking questions like "is my kid actually good at this, or is it just what the clubs are telling us to get our money?", and there's a lot more competition for activity time. For kids who are middling, it starts to make very little sense to continue with club at that point (for any sport). Only the very top players will play higher than rec past HS (in any sport), and reality of expectations tends to be a factor for the rest at some point.

Those are my speculations for why there's a significant drop off around that age, anyway.
 
sigmabody said:
Another factor, just for reference: late MS and early HS is also when kids (and parents) start asking questions like "is my kid actually good at this, or is it just what the clubs are telling us to get our money?"
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I like this one sigma body. What is a good soccer player? A good kid that can play soccer and has good grades and is just overall a good person? Or, a soccer player that is really gifted and can play at a high level with skills, soccer IQ, speed, quickness and ganas.
 
sigmabody said:
Not specific for girls, but soccer tends to become a lot more dangerous around the HS level, in my experience (several significant injuries to players when I was playing in HS). My son is currently in 8th, and playing both soccer and VB... and I would not be surprised or disappointed if his focus shifted to VB in HS. On the boys side, it's also far less crowded; in his case, he's probably equally talented for both sports, but where in soccer this lands him on a mid-tier club team and a bench player on the school soccer team, he can be a top player for school VB.

I would speculate that middle school, and going into HS, is around the time when kids are able and encouraged to explore activities beyond just what their parent put them in, and when they will start moving away from things they don't actually like (but are doing to appease their parents). This is going to pull a lot of kids out of soccer organically (soccer being one of the sports a lot of parents push kids into these days).

Another factor, just for reference: late MS and early HS is also when kids (and parents) start asking questions like "is my kid actually good at this, or is it just what the clubs are telling us to get our money?", and there's a lot more competition for activity time. For kids who are middling, it starts to make very little sense to continue with club at that point (for any sport). Only the very top players will play higher than rec past HS (in any sport), and reality of expectations tends to be a factor for the rest at some point.

Those are my speculations for why there's a significant drop off around that age, anyway.
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It's also a question that answers itself.

If your kid's not on a top team by u14 and you've been with a club for a while its fairly obvious that its not going to happen. At least not in the short term.

If playing on the 1st team is your kids goal everyone involved will need to make decisions. Does all the $$$ and time being spent still make sense? There's lots of other activities kids can spend time doing.

This ironically is why many of the Mexican leagues exist. Theres players that like playing and they see through the big club nonsense. Just make your own team and league for cheap and play at a Juco, again for cheap. Transfer to a big school if you want at a later date and graduate college with little to no debt.
 
Kids leave soccer for the same reasons why they stop playing an instrument or drawing or reading for pleasure or listening to parents . . . they become teens and make their own decisions about what's fun, what's worth their time, what's worth the effort and what's more valuable to them (eg, listening to parents or listening to peers). I think parents find the change of gears from their athletic kid so jarring because parents become so immersed in that life that the kid saying, "enough" (especially if they are talented), seemingly comes out of no where and we wonder/worry that it is not a reasoned decision. We might ask ourselves, "Do they really know what they are giving up?" but the question can/should also turn back at us for the kids that continue to make a focus of their life soccer (or any other consuming activity), "Do WE really know what they are giving up by staying in the sport?"

I think @crush's comment is so interesting - the one about the kid saying she's quitting and she has a boyfriend. That parent may have been dumbfounded but I'm guessing that if the signs were not overtly there, this kid has been less in love the sport and her place in it than the dad had been for quite a while. Unless there is some terrible episode - a kid or adult being particularly cruel, for example - these decisions are rarely spur of the moment.

(I've been a parent for nearly 27 years. My 4 kids all played sports growing up - my son stopped in HS and my 3 daughters still play at age 23, almost 19 and almost 19. I think I was good at letting them chart their own paths but I know I could have been better and often wonder just how different I may have approached the journey if I were going through it w/the knowledge that experience brings)
 
dk_b said:
Kids leave soccer for the same reasons why they stop playing an instrument or drawing or reading for pleasure or listening to parents . . . they become teens and make their own decisions about what's fun, what's worth their time, what's worth the effort and what's more valuable to them (eg, listening to parents or listening to peers). I think parents find the change of gears from their athletic kid so jarring because parents become so immersed in that life that the kid saying, "enough" (especially if they are talented), seemingly comes out of no where and we wonder/worry that it is not a reasoned decision. We might ask ourselves, "Do they really know what they are giving up?" but the question can/should also turn back at us for the kids that continue to make a focus of their life soccer (or any other consuming activity), "Do WE really know what they are giving up by staying in the sport?"

I think @crush's comment is so interesting - the one about the kid saying she's quitting and she has a boyfriend. That parent may have been dumbfounded but I'm guessing that if the signs were not overtly there, this kid has been less in love the sport and her place in it than the dad had been for quite a while. Unless there is some terrible episode - a kid or adult being particularly cruel, for example - these decisions are rarely spur of the moment.

(I've been a parent for nearly 27 years. My 4 kids all played sports growing up - my son stopped in HS and my 3 daughters still play at age 23, almost 19 and almost 19. I think I was good at letting them chart their own paths but I know I could have been better and often wonder just how different I may have approached the journey if I were going through it w/the knowledge that experience brings)
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Great advice. Btw All 4 of your kids play soccer?
 
KingMI said:
If this helps our team lost a few girls to Field Hockey and Lacrosse. I heard its new scholarship sports from the parents.
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This is true also: parents often push their kids to sports which have better scholarship potential as well (ie: less crowded, more scholarships per capita). Soccer is pretty poor in this respect currently, as there are a huge number of kids doing youth soccer in the last 15+ years. VB is pretty crowded for girls too, though, at least from what I've seen.
 
Lou789 said:
Do girls leave soccer for another sport typically around 6th-7th grade? I see a lot leaving to play volleyball. Why is that? From having played volleyball myself it’s such a different sport - doesn’t give you nearly the same workout as soccer. And it’s much more boring to watch and even to play.

Why do some girls stop playing soccer even if they are good? Is it too physical?
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Can't speak specifically for girls, but this is when club soccer becomes less fun and starts to be more of a year round job if you're playing at the highest level.
 
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