# Top Rejection Lines by Club Coaches 2019



## Supermodel56 (Jan 18, 2019)

Hey all, most players have experienced rejection at one time or another - if not, you're probably not challenging yourself enough, hah!

Given many just finished tryouts or are heading into tryouts, let's pull together the best lines you've heard either before or after... here are a few of fun the ones we've heard to kick it off... 

1) It was a difficult decision and it came down to him/her and another player...

2) He/she's on the bubble (before tryouts - translation, player isn't making the team, run!)

3) He/she's almost there, just stay on the B/C team for another year, we need to fill that roster

4) He/she didn't make the team, but we want to develop him/her

5) He/she'll get more playing time on the B/C/D team

6) He/she didn't make it, but don't leave, think of the long term, we have a 5 year plan for player to make A team

7) After multiple callbacks by A team coach and kid kills it - offers B team

8) The other players have earned it

9) We'd like to offer Harry a spot on the team.. (your kid's name is Jack)

10) Coach offers A team spot on Wed, says you have until Fri to decide, calls Thu and says we're giving the spot to someone else.

What have you heard?!??!


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## LASTMAN14 (Jan 18, 2019)

"Is your kid amphibious."


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## Eagle33 (Jan 18, 2019)

Supermodel56 said:


> Hey all, most players have experienced rejection at one time or another - if not, you're probably not challenging yourself enough, hah!
> 
> Given many just finished tryouts or are heading into tryouts, let's pull together the best lines you've heard either before or after... here are a few of fun the ones we've heard to kick it off...
> 
> ...


You already heard all of the this? Tell your kid to try a different sport.


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## toucan (Jan 18, 2019)

Parental Comments, Explanations and Rejoinders:

You have her in the wrong position.
It's just that she has a late birthday.
But she practices on her own every day!
One of your girls was mean to her.
She's really aggressive and beats up her brother.
But she has a high soccer IQ.
She scored 4 goals in her AYSO game last week.
But soccer is her passion; her goal is to play on the Women's National Team.
She is a really fast learner.
How can you say that after only 2 practices?
Other kids don't pass her the ball.
What if we do speed training?
She's tired after softball practice.
She is more motivated when she is a starter.


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## Supermodel56 (Jan 18, 2019)

Eagle33 said:


> You already heard all of the this? Tell your kid to try a different sport.


Yep. You'd think she'd have quit by now, but nope, wants to keep playing...


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## coachsamy (Jan 18, 2019)

"Your kid is not at level" 
"Your kid is not that fast"
"Your kid does not fit our system"
"We will give you a call"


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## jpeter (Jan 18, 2019)

What about your "offer" expires if we don't get your $$$ 1st installment or deposit in by Friday.

Congratulations for making the team....please confirm and  have your 1st payment in by Friday.... otherwise we can't guarantee or reserve your player a spot on this fantastic team


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## broshark (Jan 18, 2019)

toucan said:


> Parental Comments, Explanations and Rejoinders:
> 
> You have her in the wrong position.
> It's just that she has a late birthday.
> ...



LOL.  I came across a guy recently who said "yeah, my kid is moving down a team so she can have some fun and spend more time doing the other girls' hair."  I was a bit jealous.


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## Supermodel56 (Jan 18, 2019)

jpeter said:


> What about your "offer" expires if we don't get your $$$ 1st installment or deposit in by Friday.
> 
> Congratulations for making the team....please confirm and  have your 1st payment in by Friday.... otherwise we can't guarantee or reserve your player a spot on this fantastic team


We recently heard some kid didn't even get a call from the coach, just an email with a link to register and pay up.... didn't even know what team it was for!  LOL


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## jpeter (Jan 18, 2019)

Supermodel56 said:


> We recently heard some kid didn't even get a call from the coach, just an email with a link to register and pay up.... didn't even know what team it was for!  LOL


Yup and my son has received mutiple email or text "offers"  from clubs he never even tried out for or knows about.  Same with serveral of his mate's & friends.

Like a (p)fishing exercise or something, always wonder how they got our contact info, the leagues & CS used to "share" or make that public or something.


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## espola (Jan 18, 2019)

jpeter said:


> Yup and my son has received mutiple email or text "offers"  from clubs he never even tried out for or knows about.  Same with serveral of his mate's & friends.
> 
> Like a (p)fishing exercise or something, always wonder how they got our contact info, the leagues & CS used to "share" or make that public or something.


After he had played up for 2 years to be on the same team as his brother, my younger son and I had set up tryouts with 4 different clubs many years ago.  He was sick with a cold that week so he only went to 2 of them.  Nonetheless, we got offers from all four (he ended up staying with his former club, but no longer playing up a year).  We used to joke about his 200% acceptance ratio, but them my daughter, who had played one year of rec and then had dropped out of the competitive team the next year, got a call from her former rec coach who was setting up a "B" competitive team and offered her a spot without a tryout.  Thus her acceptance ratio was better than her brother's.


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## Supermodel56 (Jan 18, 2019)

Here's another one - 

Your kid is multidimensional and can undoubtedly play at any position, but she doesn't have as strong a kick as Harriet.


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## Messi>CR7 (Jan 18, 2019)

Should my kid not accept the offer to be the goalkeeper on the B team after trying out for the center mid on the A team?


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## skillz91745 (Jan 19, 2019)

He/she's got good vision of the field, but he/she just needs more time!


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## StrikerOC (Jan 19, 2019)

Supermodel56 said:


> Yep. You'd think she'd have quit by now, but nope, wants to keep playing...


Good for her! Never let anyone tell her she can't do something or isn't good enough


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## RedDevilDad (Jan 21, 2019)

StrikerOC said:


> Good for her! Never let anyone tell her she can't do something or isn't good enough


For real. I kind of want to train that kid just to see what can happen with that kind of determination. Lol.


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## CaliKlines (Jan 21, 2019)

Supermodel56 said:


> Hey all, most players have experienced rejection at one time or another - if not, you're probably not challenging yourself enough, hah!
> 
> Given many just finished tryouts or are heading into tryouts, let's pull together the best lines you've heard either before or after...
> 
> What have you heard?!!


“Oh, you’re MAP’s kid?”


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## jpeter (Jan 21, 2019)

How about the string along,  some clubs are infamous for this tatic.  Won't  necessarily reject trialist or long time players for many months but drag things out or evenutally let you know you made the squad but maybe  then give  very little playing time or minutes .    Happens more often /w sponsored teams.


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## Overlap (Jan 21, 2019)

Supermodel56 said:


> Hey all, most players have experienced rejection at one time or another - if not, you're probably not challenging yourself enough, hah!
> 
> Given many just finished tryouts or are heading into tryouts, let's pull together the best lines you've heard either before or after... here are a few of fun the ones we've heard to kick it off...
> 
> ...


#2 was the standard over the years however, I still like - "Have you tried Tennis?"


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## espola (Jan 21, 2019)

Overlap said:


> #2 was the standard over the years however, I still like - "Have you tried Tennis?"


Sometimes that works out.

Best defender on my kids' U8 and U9 teams switched to tennis --

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bradley_Klahn


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## Overlap (Jan 21, 2019)

espola said:


> Sometimes that works out.
> 
> Best defender on my kids' U8 and U9 teams switched to tennis --
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bradley_Klahn


same here, one of the kids 5-6 years ago, left and a few years later, became the HS tennis captain and is killing it on the court, terrific kid, was just really slow at the time


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## espola (Jan 21, 2019)

Overlap said:


> same here, one of the kids 5-6 years ago, left and a few years later, became the HS tennis captain and is killing it on the court, terrific kid, was just really slow at the time


Bradley was so good by the time he was in high school that he was gone all the time at tournaments all over the country.  Then in his Senior year he already had a full ride from Stanford, so he took a break from travel to play on the HS team with his friends.  He didn't come close to losing a singles or doubles match all season.


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## Paul Spacey (Jan 22, 2019)

Some VERY funny responses in this thread...funny but at the same time worrying that they are actually used as 'excuses' by coaches or whoever delivers the bad news.

I posted this new article the other day to help parents (and perhaps coaches) appreciate that being 'dropped' from a team doesn't have to be the end of the world, as long as the news is delivered honestly and respectfully. 

https://www.fcengland.com/news_article/show/986861


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## Grace T. (Jan 22, 2019)

Paul Spacey said:


> Some VERY funny responses in this thread...funny but at the same time worrying that they are actually used as 'excuses' by coaches or whoever delivers the bad news.
> 
> I posted this new article the other day to help parents (and perhaps coaches) appreciate that being 'dropped' from a team doesn't have to be the end of the world, as long as the news is delivered honestly and respectfully.
> 
> https://www.fcengland.com/news_article/show/986861



The article assumes that the coaches have the best interest of the player in mind.  That it's actually about development.  But it's not always [usually?] the case.  The coaches (being judged on wins/losses for a variety of reasons we've previously discussed on these forums) are looking for upgrades-- the so-called "impact" players they advertise for on the soccer announcement board.  They are in particular looking for upgrades in the striker, AM, CB, and keeper positions because those players have a disproportionate impact on the game.  

But let's assume, arguendo, it really is about the weaker third of the team.  If it were about development, then the system would have periodic evaluations where the weaknesses of players are identified in the bottom third and the club would work to rectify it....as it is now, it's up to the player and parent to fix things (why such an active privates market exists in the US) and in some cases even figure out what the coach wants because some coaches get defensive when approached or challenged for information for why Billy is benched.  Some players maybe shouldn't have been selected for the team, but perhaps the coach now regrets his decision or perhaps needed the roster filled out to make expenses.  And if the player still isn't progressing after the season, and the time comes for a decision that the player should play on another team, efforts would be made within the club to put them on an appropriate tiered team (Sarah is having problems with the pacing on the A team, but let's move her to lead striker on the B team and work on those timing issues for a year, then reevaluate) after a discussion with the parents (yeah I get that parents are overly sensitive too and don't want to hear it).

Two random observations also.  One, this is why what the United program is doing is a good thing....trying to come up with multiple levels so that every kid has an appropriate place to play.  Unfortunately, their tryout system (renamed something else now but still a tryout in all but name) and yearly reshuffling of coaches and teams prevents any real progress on that front.  Some of the larger clubs with ABCD teams also do this, but sometimes the cash grab gets in the way, as does the tiered system

Second, the pressure for teams to move up in tiers also doesn't help.  Take the case of my son's former team.  Finished second in their bronze division this year.  Offered a choice of promotion, and shockingly accepted it.  In competitions against the top team in the bracket, this team was often just shut out.  Against silvers, both tournaments and League Cup, the team folded easily.  By all metrics, for the sake of the players, they'd be best being the top bronze team in the bracket.  But the club feels pressure to move their teams up the silver, which will likely mean upgrades will be needed in the striker/AM/CB/keeper positions, instead of continuing the development of the players they have.  The coaches will be blamed with the team struggles at the bottom of the silver, and they'll take it out on the players.

It's not about the kids, at least here in the U.S., which is why the system is a bit of a mess.


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## Paul Spacey (Jan 22, 2019)

You make some excellent points Grace, as always. I agree with much of what you say (I share your views on the state of youth soccer in general).

The article does come from the viewpoint of coaches who truly have kids’ best interests in mind (I personally come from that viewpoint of course). There are coaches and clubs out there with the same viewpoint but unfortunately there are many with the approach that you describe in your post (cash grabbing, filling spots etc).

I think if a coach makes a mistake or adds someone to their roster and realizes they aren’t going to make up enough ground by the end of the season to ‘catch up’ with the level of the team, the right thing is to be honest about it, even if it seems unfair. Even with best intentions at the outset and experience evaluating players, you can make mistakes or overestimate how much you hope someone will improve because they have a strong work ethic and good character for example. I’ve done this a couple of times, I’ll be honest.

United are doing a pretty good job and I’ve mentioned them before in this regard. The volunteer coach issue and shuffling you mention is a problem (shuffling is a problem for lots of the bigger clubs so kids can change coaches often) but nobody has the perfect solution. Smaller clubs (like ours) can probably give more focus to individual players and we have control over staying with them (not chopping/changing coaches) but there are downsides to being ‘smaller’ and I’m aware of that, so again no club or approach is perfect.

A tiered system/club where players can move up and down based on their level of play is a good thing IMO but only if the system is conducted openly and honestly by coaches and directors. Unfortunately, this isn’t the case a lot of the time, as we know.

It’s not about the kids, you’re spot on there. It will continue to be a mess until (many) more people prioritize the needs of the kids above all else.


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