# If you could...



## KONI (Dec 10, 2017)

This goes out to all you parents who have been at this a lot lot longer than I (my daughter is a 2009). What advice do you have in terms of what to look for in a club and more importantly in a coach? In your honest opinion what matters most and what really doesn't at this age?  What advice would you give to a younger you who was just starting the process like I? Just looking for some sage advice while trying to navigate the craziness this time of year brings at the club level...thanks in advance!!


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## INFAMEE (Dec 10, 2017)

Every club is recreational.

 If you have money to burn enjoy the journey.


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## BarcaLover (Dec 10, 2017)

INFAMEE said:


> Every club is recreational.
> 
> If you have money to burn enjoy the journey.


Bitter at all?


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## coachrefparent (Dec 10, 2017)

INFAMEE said:


> Every club is recreational.
> 
> If you have money to burn enjoy the journey.


I'm sure he's not looking for a professional club for his 8 year old.


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## zebrafish (Dec 10, 2017)

INFAMEE said:


> Every club is recreational.
> 
> If you have money to burn enjoy the journey.


I think this is slightly cynical but sage advice. 

99.9% of everyone who doesn't agree with this is varying levels of delusional, with the rest (0.1% or less) being parent of professional/semiprofessional/college player.


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## KONI (Dec 10, 2017)

coachrefparent said:


> I'm sure he's not looking for a professional club for his 8 year old.


Looking for any and all advice about the journey specifically and generally....whatever speaks to people...


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## Soccerfan2 (Dec 10, 2017)

Find a reputable, local club with a coach that actually knows soccer, will focus on player development (2009’s should play all positions and be allowed to make lots of mistakes) and is a good person. Coaches and teammates come and go every year or two, so no sense getting too crazy chasing all that around. Establish a relationship with your club. 
Then practice with your kid a lot at home,  especially on first touch. If your kid shows interest and ability to be very competitive amongst peers, find a great trainer.


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## forsomuch (Dec 11, 2017)

Look for a coach who your daughter enjoys going to practice with. Look for a team that is welcoming to both your daughter and you. Go watch the coach during a game and just watch the coach and see how he behaves on the sideline. If this is going to be the people you surround your daughter and yourself with 3-4 days a week are you comfortable with that?  Trust your gut on whether your family will be happy. After all that worry about how good the team is.


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## mirage (Dec 11, 2017)

INFAMEE said:


> Every club is recreational.
> 
> If you have money to burn enjoy the journey.


If you mean that at this age (2009), you're pretty much correct.  But if you mean club soccer as a whole, then no.


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## mirage (Dec 11, 2017)

zebrafish said:


> I think this is slightly cynical but sage advice.
> 
> 99.9% of everyone who doesn't agree with this is varying levels of delusional, with the rest (0.1% or less) being parent of professional/semiprofessional/college player.


As a parent of college player, I believe its an overstatement to say that 99.9% are delusional.  Delusional from what?  We all have different objectives.  If you mean that 99.9% of parents that think their kid is going to be next Messi, then yes I agree.  But if you mean that the competitive game teaches life lessons and qualities such as leadership, working together as a team and so on, then no.

I'm sure what you'd meant is closer to being the next phenom than life lessons, but I don't want anyone to think the whole thing is delusional endeavor.


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## mirage (Dec 11, 2017)

KONI said:


> Looking for any and all advice about the journey specifically and generally....whatever speaks to people...


Background, I have a kid playing soccer in college after playing club since U10 (AYSO before that since U6), and current U16 (2002) player also playing club since U10 - both boys.

Looking back, the best advise I can give you is to keep one eye on the future and your objectives for your kid, and the other eye on simply enjoying the moment.  Whatever you think playing soccer is going to do for your kid, don't let that overwhelm your actions and logic at the expense of enjoying the moment and keeping it focused on what your kid wants to do (and not necessarily you).  In other words, keep it real.

Here is the basic parent-child player roles.

Parents (bridge builder):
- open doors and provide resources
- general 50,000 ft level direction for your kid
- encourage and be realistic

Child Player (the driver):
- motivation and initiative to improve
- work ethics and integrity
- commitment and time management

What goes with those above will take pages so I won't but I think you've read enough comments from other to know that if your child display his/her  part, you'll need to provide accordingly.  That may mean privates, getting on the better team, travel to tournaments and camps and so on.

As for coaching, when young, like yours, focus on techniques/technical skills.  Find a coach that's known for technical training (either team or private or both).  Its order of magnitude easier to learn technical skills when younger than older.  As the child gets older (12~13 yrs) start transitioning towards tactical knowledge coach.  Focus placed on how the game is won and played.  Position specific movements with and without the ball.

Nobody cares how many games your kid won at U10, 11, 12, much less how many goals scored or saved or any stats.  It starts to matter thereafter for the teams because the record enable access to better, higher profile tournaments.

Last, puberty makes a huge difference and bring changes so be ready to audible and change course, if it takes you into unexpected direction.  Even if the kid stops playing soccer, just remember its just a game and there are many other constructive outlet to engage your child into.

Enjoy the ride.....


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## KONI (Dec 11, 2017)

mirage said:


> Background, I have a kid playing soccer in college after playing club since U10 (AYSO before that since U6), and current U16 (2002) player also playing club since U10 - both boys.
> 
> Looking back, the best advise I can give you is to keep one eye on the future and your objectives for your kid, and the other eye on simply enjoying the moment.  Whatever you think playing soccer is going to do for your kid, don't let that overwhelm your actions and logic at the expense of enjoying the moment and keeping it focused on what your kid wants to do (and not necessarily you).  In other words, keep it real.
> 
> ...


I truly appreciate the time and effort taken in your post! Between a coach who is solely technical, one who is both technical and tactical, and one who primarily focuses of tactical....what would be your thoughts? I have heard some say tactical since technical can be worked on in privates...would love your 2 cents on this


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## Grace T. (Dec 11, 2017)

Soccerfan2 said:


> Then practice with your kid a lot at home,  especially on first touch. If your kid shows interest and ability to be very competitive amongst peers, find a great trainer.


This is tough unless the parent has played at least college of club level high school ball, or really throws themselves into coaching education.  I've seen quite a few parents instruct their kid wrong (a little knowledge can be a dangerous thing), or have the kid be dishearted by the criticism on the ride back home.  My own son (a GK age 9) has surpassed by my own level of knowledge now (I played GK into middle school).  And by about age 9 too, many kids begin to push back on parenting (whether in homework, or in sports practice).  If the parent can refrain from coaching and just go out and have some fun (giving the kid additional touches on the ball), that could be useful.  The kid can also go out and bang against a wall or do Coever moves as well, but as others have pointed out, it's hard to keep their motivation going as such repetitive exercises can be boring.  You can look for the much praised pickup games, though with free range kids now being rare they are hard to find, and sometimes wind up being more organized than intended.

As to tactical v. technical coaches, the US Soccer Curriculum leans heavily on guided self-learning.  Coaches aren't supposed to be out there teaching individual players how to properly trap a ball.  When I questioned the instructors on my own licensing exam about "where they learn those basics", I was told they are either expected to bring it into club with them, or that's what trainers are for.


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## Striker17 (Dec 11, 2017)

I think until they are 12 the focus should be technique and love of the game. Keep them interested and engaged, encourage participation in other sports, avoid the trap the fall into the "year round culture". Find coaches who respect that you have a diverse and probably varied interest child! 
When a foundation is laid for a true love of the game so much more falls into line. You have so much available online - tutorials, ideas, ball at feet ideas. The coach and club represent only a fraction of your experience. You and your daughter encompass the majority of it. 
Once 12 hits the focus shifts but at that point you will know so don't overthink. I wish I could go back to my u10 self and say relax it's going to be perfect in a few years! 
Keep perspective and trust your choices. No matter what her club or coach it will be you alone that is her main advocate and creates opportunities for her In the game. Don't forget that!


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## mirage (Dec 11, 2017)

KONI said:


> I truly appreciate the time and effort taken in your post! Between a coach who is solely technical, one who is both technical and tactical, and one who primarily focuses of tactical....what would be your thoughts? I have heard some say tactical since technical can be worked on in privates...would love your 2 cents on this


Since you've asked, I would pick the coach that focuses on technical skills at your daughter's age.

Repetition is a key part of skills development and unless you're going to do privates multiple times a week, I would pick a technical coach.

My older kid used to juggle while he waited for his school carpool to arrive in the morning for 10~15 minutes.  Just that alone improved his touch significantly.


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## Multi Sport (Dec 11, 2017)

The 10 minute rule:

Give yourself 10 minutes to discuss the game. If your DD wants to go longer then let her talk but make it light. This way your kid wont be dreading the drive home because they have to listen to an hour long lecture on what they did wrong.

Enjoy your ride... it really does go by in the blink of an eye.


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## oh canada (Dec 11, 2017)

Don't be a frequent reader or poster on these boards.  Once a month at most!  More than that?  Then your kid's life has become yours.

Also, don't buy into the year-long club soccer commitment at your kid's age.  Play futsal, indoor, rec, etc. (along with other sports/activities throughout the year..hockey eh?) then at 12+ consider dedicating many of your weekends and holidays to soccer if it's your daughter's #1 interest. 

Even 5-6 years ago, the commitment levels required by club soccer were not as onerous.  Think about it...they are more than any other youth sport in the U.S.  And, for the smallest payoff for the few that do make it to the top.  Even NHL players make a better buck than MLS.


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## Messi>CR7 (Dec 11, 2017)

For the parents:
-Have the right perspective.  I personally view this as a $2,000 hobby.  I get way more enjoyment out of watching my DD play and improve, talking to her about soccer, and spending lone time together driving her to soccer, than I would've had from playing 20 rounds of golf.  I can't think of a better activity that will allow me to *regularly* spend so much quality time with my DD before it's too late.
-Get educated on soccer yourself if you are not already.  This will allow you to figure out if a particular coach is good or is the type of coach you're looking for.  This will also eliminate some unnecessary heartaches often seen at at younger ages (e.g. unhappy that your DD playing more defense than offense, have a hear attack when you see DD play back to the goalie, etc).
-Have your DD train with the team for a few sessions and let her be part of the decision making.  Which group of girls and coach does she like the best is probably the most important question at this age.  If you only attend one session, the girls might be playing some type of fun games for most of the session without doing any skills training (quite typically for a team of 8 years old).  You want to watch a few sessions to see a good balance of fun, technical training, and scrimmages.
-Look through the league game logs and find those clubs that tend to field a smaller roster.  Some clubs field a very small roster for younger teams with minimum bench (e.g. 9 players for 7v7).  Fewer players mean more playing time.  Everyone is happy.

For the kids:
-Not much.  8 year olds mostly just want to play.  Remove the parents and there is no drama .


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## Simisoccerfan (Dec 11, 2017)

Soccer needs to be fun.  Keep her with her friends and a good coach until she is entering High School.  Then if she is good move her to a major club.  The major clubs have so many more connections and benefits that will help her make the transition to college ball.  If she doesn't want to play in college, keep it about fun and friends.


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## Josep (Dec 11, 2017)

Where do you live?  Find a great technical coach.  Sorry but there are a lot of crappy kids out there that are u13 and above.


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## smellycleats (Dec 11, 2017)

forsomuch said:


> Look for a coach who your daughter enjoys going to practice with. Look for a team that is welcoming to both your daughter and you. Go watch the coach during a game and just watch the coach and see how he behaves on the sideline. If this is going to be the people you surround your daughter and yourself with 3-4 days a week are you comfortable with that?  Trust your gut on whether your family will be happy. After all that worry about how good the team is.


I wish I could agree with this 40 times


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## INFAMEE (Dec 12, 2017)

mirage said:


> If you mean that at this age (2009), you're pretty much correct.  But if you mean club soccer as a whole, then no.


Name 1 club with an incentive to develop professional soccer players? I'll wait.

College soccer doesn't require technical players, and neither does MLS, and neither does the USMNT.

Club soccer is recreational. The more money you spend the more uppity fun club you can join. All kids with money can join a club, not all kids with no money can join these clubs. Are you competing against the best, or are you competing against the best who can afford it?


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## NumberTen (Dec 12, 2017)

US soccer is not a meritocracy.  Pay to play is all that is going on right now.  You either pay or you don't play.  It's just that simple.  99% of parents who envision soccer for their kids after HS are thinking a college scholarship, not a professional soccer career.  A bachelors degree or a master degree far outweighs anything that the 0.1% of kids will ever get out of professional soccer.


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## mirage (Dec 12, 2017)

INFAMEE said:


> Name 1 club with an incentive to develop professional soccer players? I'll wait.
> 
> College soccer doesn't require technical players, and neither does MLS, and neither does the USMNT.
> 
> Club soccer is recreational. The more money you spend the more uppity fun club you can join. All kids with money can join a club, not all kids with no money can join these clubs. Are you competing against the best, or are you competing against the best who can afford it?


Get over yourself.

If you're so focused on developing professional soccer payers, what are you doing posting on this forum.  

None of us are talking about professional academies.  Just club soccer for kids.


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## INFAMEE (Dec 12, 2017)

mirage said:


> Get over yourself.
> 
> If you're so focused on developing professional soccer payers, what are you doing posting on this forum.
> 
> None of us are talking about professional academies.  Just club soccer for kids.


If they're not in the business to develop professional soccer players what are they doing? Exactly. It's recreational no need to get emotional about it.

As stated prior to your rambling. If you got money to burn, enjoy the journey.


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## Josep (Dec 12, 2017)

I know several kids playing college soccer after lengthy club careers.  That’s hardly recreational.  Some club is certainly recreational as many are just burning money.  I agree that a majority are going nowhere.  

But there’s definite potential to get value out of playing.


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## coachrefparent (Dec 12, 2017)

INFAMEE said:


> If they're not in the business to develop professional soccer players what are they doing? Exactly. It's recreational no need to get emotional about it.
> 
> As stated prior to your rambling. If you got money to burn, enjoy the journey.


Looks like you're  the emotional one. And of course 9 year olds shouldn't be professionals.

As for the parents, a few thousand a year (many local clubs a lot less too) is not a lot, especially compared to the cost of other kids activities. Maybe you need a better job?


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## MWN (Dec 12, 2017)

INFAMEE said:


> Name 1 club with an incentive to develop professional soccer players? I'll wait.
> 
> College soccer doesn't require technical players, and neither does MLS, and neither does the USMNT.
> 
> Club soccer is recreational. The more money you spend the more uppity fun club you can join. All kids with money can join a club, not all kids with no money can join these clubs. Are you competing against the best, or are you competing against the best who can afford it?


Good news! Your wait is over.  MLS Development Academies have an incentive to develop professional soccer players under the "Homegrown Players" incentive, which exempts those players from the SuperDraft.  A player qualifies as a Homegrown Player if the player has been a member of a club's youth academy for at least one year and has met the necessary training and retention requirements.  So the list looks like this:

1. FC Dallas (18 Homegrown players signed)
2. LA Galaxy 
3. NY Red Bulls
4. Real Salt Lake
5. Vancouver Whitecaps
etc., etc.

In addition to the above incentive for the MLS affiliated DA programs, we should see some very quick changes come up with the new US Soccer President, as virtually all candidates roundly support paying (passing down) solidarity payments and training fees under FIFA RSTP (Regulations on the Status and Transfer of Players).

With regard to pay-to-play, please appreciate that virtually every DA Club with boys U15 and above teams are fully funded ... i.e. parents don't pay for training and travel.

With regard to the non-DA teams most of these teams have scholarships for economically disadvantaged kids that represent Flight 1/Gold/Premiere/ODP talent.  In my area (Temecula Valley), I can tell you that Arsenal, Hawks, Temecula United and Murrieta Surf all have kids playing for free.

Finally, name a youth sport where parents are not asked to pay?  Baseball?  Football? Basketball?  Hockey?  We need to get off this whole pay-to-play issue and recognize that for the vast majority of kids, all youth sports are supposed to be recreational.  Travel and Club teams simply afford parents and players an opportunity to get better coaching, play more games, have more practices, and play on much better fields with better referees.  Nothing wrong with it.


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## smellycleats (Dec 12, 2017)

coachrefparent said:


> Looks like you're  the emotional one. And of course 9 year olds shouldn't be professionals.
> 
> As for the parents, a few thousand a year (many local clubs a lot less too) is not a lot, especially compared to the cost of other kids activities. Maybe you need a better job?


Everyone settle down. Kids/families play club for different reasons. Some play because AYSO and Core aren’t competitive enough. Some want to play year round and want a professional coach that doesn’t play “daddy ball”. Some play to get to college some have WNT it pro dreams.  There’s a club and a team for every player. Expectations need to be managed and at a certain point goals need to be clarified. You don’t always know what the end game is when a kid is 9.


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## INFAMEE (Dec 12, 2017)

Josep said:


> I know several kids playing college soccer after lengthy club careers.  That’s hardly recreational.  Some club is certainly recreational as many are just burning money.  I agree that a majority are going nowhere.
> 
> But there’s definite potential to get value out of playing.


Somebody has to get college scholarships. Definitely not the boys playing mx league every weekend. Common sense, right?

Point is club soccer is rec ball. They show the basics that is required for college. Which is not much other than athletes playing kick and chase.


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## INFAMEE (Dec 12, 2017)

Common sense. Somebody has to fill in the blanks by default. Same goes for college and the USMNT.


1. FC Dallas (18 Homegrown players signed)
2. LA Galaxy 
3. NY Red Bulls
4. Real Salt Lake
5. Vancouver Whitecaps
etc., etc.


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## espola (Dec 12, 2017)

INFAMEE said:


> Somebody has to get college scholarships. Definitely not the boys playing mx league every weekend. Common sense, right?
> 
> Point is club soccer is rec ball. They show the basics that is required for college. Which is not much other than athletes playing kick and chase.


I'm sorry about your club soccer experience.  It's not all that bad.


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## INFAMEE (Dec 12, 2017)

espola said:


> I'm sorry about your club soccer experience.  It's not all that bad.


Who ever said I had a bad experience??

Club soccer is fun. If something  more comes out of it like a college scholarship or the opportunity to meet and play with foreign players in MLS one must be grateful.


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## Josep (Dec 12, 2017)

INFAMEE said:


> Who ever said I had a bad experience??
> 
> Club soccer is fun. If something  more comes out of it like a college scholarship or the opportunity to meet and play with foreign players in MLS one must be grateful.



Then why try to bash it?  Again, why be here?


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## Striker17 (Dec 12, 2017)

People can have an opinion without being bitter or "bashing a club". It's called rationale and logical arguments.


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## INFAMEE (Dec 12, 2017)

Josep said:


> Then why try to bash it?  Again, why be here?


Don't be a lemming, Joseph. That is what has been keeping this well oiled pay to play system running smoothly.  This forum too by the way, charging fees for basic features to parrot off and share meaningless data on the weekly basis.

Paying parents don't want to hear the truth because they're having too much fun living a lie.


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## espola (Dec 12, 2017)

INFAMEE said:


> Who ever said I had a bad experience??
> 
> Club soccer is fun. If something  more comes out of it like a college scholarship or the opportunity to meet and play with foreign players in MLS one must be grateful.


" club soccer is rec ball."  

Not always.


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## espola (Dec 12, 2017)

INFAMEE said:


> Don't be a lemming, Joseph. That is what has been keeping this well oiled pay to play system running smoothly.  This forum too by the way, charging fees for basic features to parrot off and share meaningless data on the weekly basis.
> 
> Paying parents don't want to hear the truth because they're having too much fun living a lie.


Cue crying baby pic.


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## INFAMEE (Dec 12, 2017)

espola said:


> Cue crying baby pic.


Is this the part where I hurl a clever retort at you?

lol@ your pathetic antagonizing attempts. Weak link.


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## Josep (Dec 12, 2017)

Striker17 said:


> People can have an opinion without being bitter or "bashing a club". It's called rationale and logical arguments.


People don’t take a negative stance against something without an unfavorable opinion. Rant away.  I’m not saying anyone isn’t entitled to their opinions. I’ve been on this forum or 8-9 years now.  None of this is new.


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## Striker17 (Dec 12, 2017)

I hear you but I also think the vast majority of people are incapable of an intelligent out of the box discussion without attacking someone. At this point it humorous to me though.


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## Josep (Dec 12, 2017)

Striker17 said:


> I hear you but I also think the vast majority of people are incapable of an intelligent out of the box discussion without attacking someone. At this point it humorous to me though.


 Exactly. The whole thing makes me chuckle. I worry about my kids.   I’m pretty sure we’ve shared the same grass from time to time.


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## NumberTen (Dec 12, 2017)

*TROLL ALERT: SIMONMAGUS returns as MaradonaDiego90301,  now as INFAMEE*


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## rainbow_unicorn (Dec 12, 2017)

KONI said:


> I truly appreciate the time and effort taken in your post! Between a coach who is solely technical, one who is both technical and tactical, and one who primarily focuses of tactical....what would be your thoughts? I have heard some say tactical since technical can be worked on in privates...would love your 2 cents on this


For 2009's, I would say maybe 60% technical, 40% tactical.  I would want to see the coach introducing simple tactical concepts (spacing, pressuring, movement off ball) at this age.


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## INFAMEE (Dec 12, 2017)

NumberTen said:


> *TROLL ALERT: SIMONMAGUS returns as MaradonaDiego90301,  now as INFAMEE*


Actually it's been you lemmings that have TROLLED us long enough with your glorified kick ball pay to play recreational club soccer mentality.
Get your head out of your ass already, simps. You ain't fooling anyone!

.
.


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## Chalklines (Dec 12, 2017)

My kids do club since AYSO is absolutely trash in our region and success is completely frowned upon with them. 

I'll agree with the burned out poster about club being rec to a point. Depending on where you live in this country all leagues are not created equal.

Living in California now, "travel baseball and Club Soccer" have now become the new rec leagues of the past. You truly find zero tallent out here in rec leagues since everyone needs to keep up with Jones and join club and traveling teams.


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## soccerjunkiedad (Dec 12, 2017)

Find the team(s) with the best coach(es) not the teams with necessarily the best records. Sometimes it is both , but not always. My daughter's first year training with a club coach was with Rampage. She was a year younger than most of the team, so the coach just had her training with the team for the year. Free. That team won state that year. That coach is now the head coach at UCSD. My daughter's first official year in club was at LAFC and the team record was 1-11. She developed the most that one calendar year. Half that team is now going or will be going to D1 schools. That coach is now the 1st assistant at Oregon. After that she joined RSC and played for a few coaches and ended playing ECNL with another fantastic coach. She just finished her last club year and is off to D1 next year. Sometimes my daughter would be the best on her team and that was when I knew it was time to switch teams. It's hard for the lead dog to always stay the sharpest as they set the pace. It was optimum to have my daughter like top 3rd of the team as she is super competitive and would rise as the team grew. Also practicing  vs her teammates who are super skilled and competitive, as well as playing vs the best competition. It will take a little work to find that coach/team, but you will. I found our path after my daughter won the AYSO state cup I called UCLA to see if I can pay to have some of the women's players come to my team's practice to train my team. The coach I spoke to was an assistant and that opened the door to Rampage which led to LAFC. 

The more time spent playing outside the team structure the better. My daughter and (sons and )I would spend at least an hour a day just playing small sided games 3v3 4v4. Just working on  first touch, passing, shooting and fitness. It's great bonding time, and my children loved playing as a family which allowed my daughter to compete against 3 older brothers. Lots of crying when she was younger (6-9), but now she is and has been a beast who is way more physical then most. Futsal is great. She would also play a lot by herself. The best drill I recall her doing is just kicking the ball at the curb and controlling the return (never on the ground to her feet) OR flip the park picnic bench sideways so it can be used like a rebounded or bounce back.. Also drawing up plays and coaching her collection of soccer balls in the backyard with positioning and angles (I don't know how much that helped, but it was part of the package of who she is). She also guested on lots of teams which allowed her to compete with different teammates and getting a different coaching perspective. She played for a coach who played on the Chinese National team/captain. Played for ODP coaches in SD. Played for a team from Alaska. Among others.

Other things I think benefited her development over the years are the obvious ones she had to develop on her own: Love for the game. Passion. Discipline. Having a strong work ethic. Having a  favorite professional team.  Playing FIFA. Having team friends that she kept over the years that pushes her to stay sharp. I'm proud of how hard she worked. It's a long ride, but sitting her looking back it went really quickly. Best of luck and enjoy the ride.


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## Mystery Train (Dec 12, 2017)

KONI said:


> This goes out to all you parents who have been at this a lot lot longer than I (my daughter is a 2009). What advice do you have in terms of what to look for in a club and more importantly in a coach? In your honest opinion what matters most and what really doesn't at this age?  What advice would you give to a younger you who was just starting the process like I? Just looking for some sage advice while trying to navigate the craziness this time of year brings at the club level...thanks in advance!!


We didn't start our daughter in club until U11, and we were told that was "the latest" you could start club and hope to get on a good team.  Which is total BS.  I am thinking we will wait on our 09 son for a few more seasons before going club (if he wants to).  If you and your DD have already decided club soccer is the way to go right now, the best advice I can give you is to find a coach who has a reputation/track record of developing skills, and completely ignore records/rankings/club name/league.  For girls, team bonding and friendships are critical at this age, so it is best if she knows some of the girls/families on the team.  FUN should be number 1 priority with the youngers, and even at the older age groups, I still always ask my daughter "Did you have fun?" after practices and games.  Because if not, who gives a rip about anything else?  It's freakin' soccer.


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## Multi Sport (Dec 12, 2017)

INFAMEE said:


> Definitely not the boys playing mx league every weekend. Common sense, right?


If they have good grades, why not?


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## Messi>CR7 (Dec 13, 2017)

Mystery Train said:


> FUN should be number 1 priority with the youngers, and even at the older age groups, I still always ask my daughter "Did you have fun?" after practices and games.  Because if not, who gives a rip about anything else?  It's freakin' soccer.


Can't agree with this more.  One thing to look for if your DD trains with a team you are considering, see if the girls like to "linger" after the practice and just play.  When my DD played U8, the whole teams usually lingered for another 20 minutes after practice because it was FUN!  I often had to go in to drag her out of there .

I think an important goal at this age is to put your DD in an environment so she will love the game a lot more 3 or 4 years from now.  How good a player she will be 4 years from now is more up to her than you.

Good luck.


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## soccermama213 (Dec 13, 2017)

My #1 advice is put her where your child will play! A child on the bench (despite training etc) will lose confidence and eventually interest. Playing means fun. Coach wise - pick on that knows the game (played before is better) and teaches without degrading and mind games. My child is almost 17, commmited to a D1 school and has has turned down offers to play on DA and ECNL clubs because she wanted to 1) not commute hours, 2) have fun and not be in such a cut throat environment and 3) play HS. She loves to play. She loves her teammates and her team is on of top in the area. I attribute this to good coaching, and her being in an environment that promotes the love of the game


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## Livinthedream (Dec 13, 2017)

Striker17 said:


> People can have an opinion without being bitter or "bashing a club". It's called rationale and logical arguments.


That’s funny coming from you.


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## Livinthedream (Dec 13, 2017)

Striker17 said:


> I hear you but I also think the vast majority of people are incapable of an intelligent out of the box discussion without attacking someone. At this point it humorous to me though.


Or you can call someone a buffoon then hit ignore like a spoiled child.


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