Thank you!
In summary:
Test prep - yes Recommendations?
Multiple Tests- yes
Showcases- yes
Id Camps- No or only when personally invited
Highlight Video- debatable. I think yes.
Private training- ?
Recruiting Service? If yes, recommendations?
Anything else we need to budget?
The first thing you need to know is that there is no right answer and it all depends on targeted schools (assuming there is a list).
Our older son is in his 3rd year in college and is playing so my data is few years old so the costs have increased, almost certainly.
Its probably already mentioned and you've may have been told by many that pick the school based on academic goals. If the objective is just to play soccer, the cost of getting recruited somewhere (no name school somewhere in USA ) is very low. Probably just a highlight video and signing up for website like Captain U or NCSA and alike. The challenge is to be recruited from desirable school on your list of options. From no name, private schools (there are lots of schools you probably never heard of), we used to get emails and calls saying "we have scholarship money, come play for us" from several schools/coaches.
1st - Define a pool of schools that fits your kid, just like non-athletes and have stretch, likely and safe schools in the mix.
2nd - Cannot emphasize this point more - grades, grades, grades, then test scores. Coaches has to meet aggregate academic metric for the team, in addition to NCAA rules most often (but not all schools).
3rd - Don't let D1~D3 or NAIA be a decision criteria. In other words, unless your kids goal is to be a pro, he's going to college for education first. Oh, btw, if he wants to be a pro, don't waste his time at college, send him to Europe or South America and arrange a tryout for him.
Our older son was recruited by 3 schools on his list during his 11th grade year and formalized with an official visit in his senior year. This is where the boys and girls differ. On the boys side, the official visit is a part of recruiting process, whereas for girls, it happens after they verbally commit.
In terms of outlay, if your kid's test score is good enough for the schools he is looking at, then there is no test prep cost. We were lucky because he had great grades and test scores without having to do any test prep. In terms of test scores, If he is off by more than 100 SAT points below the average accepted student score for any given school, then probably should. Also, if he is taking AP classes, make sure you have him take the SAT subject tests that matches/similar to his AP subjects, right after the AP test (so SAT subject test in June). As for the test costs, its relatively small compared to all the other items. Our older son took the SAT twice and ACT once. Our younger kid (senior in HS this year and not looking to play in college) took both SAT and ACT twice.
Showcases are function of his club team isn't it? If he is in DA, there are built in showcases (winter and summer playoff) and if he's not, then its a function of where he's teams gets accepted in the tournaments. I think you know the cost there by now pretty well.
ID camps really need to be focused. I can only recommend doing "lots of schools and coaches" ID camps once and the very first time. The reason being that its only good for meeting a coaches and get experience of knowing what an ID camp is like. Thereafter, only do targeted school's ID camp and make sure that there are pre-camp correspondences with their coaches. Our older son did multiple ID camps with one of the schools he was recruited at, as well as a single ID camp with the other two schools.
Highlight video is required for all practical purposes. Its necessary as a conversation starter with coaches. It really doesn't cost all that much (less than $1K), especially if you video, identify key frames and specify. I did all by myself - both recording and editing, as well as final production. It just took bit of time but did two videos a year a part - one between 9th and 10th, then between 10-11th grade.
Older son did not do any privates training after U14. Not sure what training your son needs but perhaps speed and agility? Or are you thinking of soccer skill training still?
As for recruiting services, we did not use one. Its a mixed bag. I know people who did use and got success from it, and those that didn't , like us. Keep in mind that EVERY COACH will say that they take interest in players that take interest in them.
Our biggest costs was travel and lodging to get to ID camps as we had several east coast schools. It was good thing that I had lots of frequent flyer miles and hotel points so it helped a bit, but we still spent quite a bit on invisible costs (local transportation, food, misc).
In all I believe we spend somewhere around $10K~$12K from the very first ID camp to commitment. Keep in mind that I traveled with our kid to all of these things so the cost can be cut by at least 1/3, if you are willing to let your son go alone to fly away camps.
At the end of the day, you do what you can for your kid and hope that its enough. I know several players who played with our son that's attending local CSU/s and UC's and playing. I can guarantee you that they didn't spend as much as we did. So it depends on what schools you are looking at...
Good luck.