Pulling out of State cup?

S

sweeperkeeper

SILVER
Hello everyone,

I'm wondering if any team on this board has pulled out of State cup or any tournament for that matter? Generally, there is a fine that occurs when this happens and I'm trying to see who pays this. Is it only the families who pull out or does the team just divide it up? I can add some context.

Our team is a lower level team.... We were around .500 for most of the season and planned on going to State Cup mostly for the experience. We figured we would go 1-2 but either way we decided to go knowing that we could have to travel a bit. Of course we got put in Lancaster which is 3 hours from us. Adding to it is that our goalie broke his foot and our backup is basically refusing to play goalie. We have someone who can play but we would prefer it if he didn't as he is a better field player. As the team stand now, we would probably go 0-3. The parents are having a hard time justifying the trip only to get crushed. As of now, there are 3 families that are for sure not going.

So the goalie's mom was our team parent and I am getting stuck with this mess. In the mean time, we are looking to pick up some players and might get lucky but as it stands now we are running down to 12 kids, and hopefully no one else decides to skip.

Any guidance would be greatly appreciated.
 
It seems to me that you're in a tough spot but consider the following....

- Team parent's responsibility remains with or without his/her kid being able to play. The commitment is made by the parent to the entire team.

- Lancaster sucks. There's no sugar coating it and the fact that the team probably will go 0-3 sucks even more. That said, what example are the parents displaying to their kids? Do you all really want to set an example to your kids that when tough gets going, its okay to quit? Worse, if you don't like it, then simply walk away, even though you've made a commitment to the other players, team and the club?

Not being harsh or lacking empathy for your situation. If it was my kid and his team, I would tell him to do the best you can and compete. To the parents of the team, I'd say suck it up and deal with it. They've all made a commitment to the team for the season.

As for the keeper's parent who happens to be the manager, just give the job back and say its your responsibility and not mine. Just remind the person that you have no issue helping out but the he/she has to act for the team - not just for their kid.
 
mirage said:
It seems to me that you're in a tough spot but consider the following....

- Team parent's responsibility remains with or without his/her kid being able to play. The commitment is made by the parent to the entire team.

- Lancaster sucks. There's no sugar coating it and the fact that the team probably will go 0-3 sucks even more. That said, what example are the parents displaying to their kids? Do you all really want to set an example to your kids that when tough gets going, its okay to quit? Worse, if you don't like it, then simply walk away, even though you've made a commitment to the other players, team and the club?

Not being harsh or lacking empathy for your situation. If it was my kid and his team, I would tell him to do the best you can and compete. To the parents of the team, I'd say suck it up and deal with it. They've all made a commitment to the team for the season.

As for the keeper's parent who happens to be the manager, just give the job back and say its your responsibility and not mine. Just remind the person that you have no issue helping out but the he/she has to act for the team - not just for their kid.
Click to expand...

I always looked forward to Lancaster. It was close enough to be easy to get to, but far enough away to be "away". And three different times there was a midnight police chase that ended right next to our hotel, or a crime that required lights and sirens police response right next door.
 
One of my best memories was taking my son to Lancaster for his first State Cup.

The Game: We had joined the team after the season ... moved from Rec to Club and he was the 2nd GK. He got very little playing time and we had to go back to Lancaster the following weekend, he was put in after the No.1 GK felt a bit ill ... going to PKs ... the team lost, if I recall.

The Experience: We stayed in a somewhat seedy hotel (Knights Inn). The boy and I talked about important stuff (to him) on the drive up, had dinner with the team, watched TV together in the hotel room, joked around, had breakfast, and generally connected. We bought the obligatory State Cup sweatshirt and have fond memories of that trip.

Tell all your parents that we go to Lancaster not because we think its better than Hawaii, we go knowing that it is a pain in the ass, because its an opportunity to be with our kids. There will be a time VERY SOON, when your kid holes up in his room playing video games, texting/snapchatting/or whatever the tech of the day is. He may still play soccer, but after the game he doesn't want a ride back to the house with you ... he is going with his friends to In/Out and Kyle, his teammate is driving.

You and your parents have exactly {......} much time with your kids and {...............................................................................} where you kid will be on his own page as a teenager or all grown up. Don't waste it.
 
Lancaster isn’t that bad. It’s not Del Mar.
But there’s a yard house and an in n out.
Just lock your car.
 
When you are up against it and things look bleak, that is often the best time for young players to develop character and resilience, two things many young people (inside and outside of youth sports) could do with a dose of in this age.

Every opportunity for building character and resilience should be taken, if it seems like a tough/negative experience initially. If framed correctly, parents can usually turn it into a positive learning experience.
 
timbuck said:
Lancaster isn’t that bad. It’s not Del Mar.
But there’s a yard house and an in n out.
Just lock your car.
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There’s also this ridiculously good cupcake store next door in Palmdale: https://www.nadiacakes.com/our-cupcakes

OP, I’m sorry. No insight on your actual question about a cost/ penalty but that situation is rough. You all went in to this with the right mindset—going for the experience (including the obligatory State Cup sweatshirt). If you have enough players to take the field, I hope your team goes.
 
I agree that the message to kids is a poor one and more than one family has called out those not wanting to make the trip. However, there are kids that might be switching clubs so I don't think there is the same level of commitment to the team versus if they knew they were coming back.

I'm all about the drive and hanging out with our kid for the long car ride. Hoping that we get a few players in the next 2 weeks.
 
sweeperkeeper said:
Hello everyone,

I'm wondering if any team on this board has pulled out of State cup or any tournament for that matter? Generally, there is a fine that occurs when this happens and I'm trying to see who pays this. Is it only the families who pull out or does the team just divide it up? I can add some context.

Our team is a lower level team.... We were around .500 for most of the season and planned on going to State Cup mostly for the experience. We figured we would go 1-2 but either way we decided to go knowing that we could have to travel a bit. Of course we got put in Lancaster which is 3 hours from us. Adding to it is that our goalie broke his foot and our backup is basically refusing to play goalie. We have someone who can play but we would prefer it if he didn't as he is a better field player. As the team stand now, we would probably go 0-3. The parents are having a hard time justifying the trip only to get crushed. As of now, there are 3 families that are for sure not going.

So the goalie's mom was our team parent and I am getting stuck with this mess. In the mean time, we are looking to pick up some players and might get lucky but as it stands now we are running down to 12 kids, and hopefully no one else decides to skip.

Any guidance would be greatly appreciated.
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From State Cup Rules

3.10. Teams wishing to withdraw from the competition after applying to the Tournament must have their head coach or team manager notify the State Cup Program Coordinator at StateCupinfo@calsouth.com in writing (e-mail will suffice) of their desire to withdraw. Teams withdrawing prior to the Draw Date, but after the registration deadline, will be assessed $125.00 administrative fee. Teams withdrawing after the Draw Date shall forfeit their entry fee and be subject to further disciplinary action including a fine up to $500.

3.11. Teams withdrawing after publication of the game schedule for their division are subject to a $500 fine which shall be invoiced to the affiliate club.
 
https://www.theatlantic.com/photo/2...8cQ_rXp7SqdN_yoBMfgiIrcdPlcZg6Ap-6kJourbZDyx0

Show the team some of the poor conditions that other children play soccer in around the world (courtesy of socalkdg's earlier post)............and tell them to stop whining. If you don't love or at least enjoy the game, it then becomes a chore and you will always be entrenched in unnecessary club soccer drama.

Frankly, it's better to go knowing the opponents are all slightly better than going for three sure wins.
 
Lots of teams limp into State Cup with skeleton crews. Injuries, moving to a new team, coach bailing or lack of interest after the holidays is pretty common.
It's a fun experience for the kids. Might suck for the parents. But don't let the kids know that.
Don't go in thinking you're going to lose your 3 games and be done. As they say in sports "That's why we play the game." Maybe your opponents will have the same issues. Maybe their GK will get stomach flu the morning of the first game and can't take the field. Maybe your team can prep kids to step in and be a "team player" and play keeper for the weekend. Maybe the coach will get tossed out of the game and not have a backup.
You play the cards you are dealt and hope for the best.
Get those kids a damn $45 sweatshirt so they can walk around the school / mall / beach and be proud that they are competitors.
 
sweeperkeeper said:
I agree that the message to kids is a poor one and more than one family has called out those not wanting to make the trip. However, there are kids that might be switching clubs so I don't think there is the same level of commitment to the team versus if they knew they were coming back.

I'm all about the drive and hanging out with our kid for the long car ride. Hoping that we get a few players in the next 2 weeks.
Click to expand...
Below is what many softball teams do when they go to Lancaster for their version of the State Cup. Not sure why this never caught on in soccer, but something for your team to consider:
-The team rents a 12-people van and one or two parents drive all the kids the whole weekend (to and back from Lancaster, to and back from each game). It's a real road trip for the kids.
-Before the trip, the kids all get together and decorate the bus with chalks (with their names, jersey #, etc.)
-Other than the driver parents, you don't need to be there an hour ahead for the match. You just show up right before game time :)
-If you don't like the long drive to Lancaster, Metrolink station is nearby. You can take the train there and just Uber around town.

Good luck.
 
timbuck said:
Lots of teams limp into State Cup with skeleton crews. Injuries, moving to a new team, coach bailing or lack of interest after the holidays is pretty common.
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Son's U11 season: Maybe half of rostered players are "Club level," but team is strong enough defensively to compete through a 1st weekend. Starting central mid's family decides after schedules are out not to make the drive, oh, and they are already moving to a new club anyway (but not State Cup eligible). Kids and parents find out at the field that he's not coming. That was...odd.
 
Messi>CR7 said:
Below is what many softball teams do when they go to Lancaster for their version of the State Cup. Not sure why this never caught on in soccer, but something for your team to consider:
-The team rents a 12-people van and one or two parents drive all the kids the whole weekend (to and back from Lancaster, to and back from each game). It's a real road trip for the kids.
-Before the trip, the kids all get together and decorate the bus with chalks (with their names, jersey #, etc.)
-Other than the driver parents, you don't need to be there an hour ahead for the match. You just show up right before game time :)
-If you don't like the long drive to Lancaster, Metrolink station is nearby. You can take the train there and just Uber around town.

Good luck.
Click to expand...

This sounds like a great idea! I think if the team was excited to go then I would bring it up. At this point I just hope to get 14 players to make the trip. However, I will think about it for my younger.

Tim.... You make a good point that we have no idea what the other team will look like. I'm sure that teams that have been picking up players for the local tournaments might not have that luxury if most teams are playing that weekend.
 
jrcaesar said:
Son's U11 season: Maybe half of rostered players are "Club level," but team is strong enough defensively to compete through a 1st weekend. Starting central mid's family decides after schedules are out not to make the drive, oh, and they are already moving to a new club anyway (but not State Cup eligible). Kids and parents find out at the field that he's not coming. That was...odd.
Click to expand...
That kind of thing teaches the kid a really poor lesson about commitment to a team/cause. Unfortunately, it's very common and happens all the time. And we wonder why some kids are not resilient or loyal enough and jump from club to club or new thing to new thing all the time. There you go.
 
jrcaesar said:
Son's U11 season: Maybe half of rostered players are "Club level," but team is strong enough defensively to compete through a 1st weekend. Starting central mid's family decides after schedules are out not to make the drive, oh, and they are already moving to a new club anyway (but not State Cup eligible). Kids and parents find out at the field that he's not coming. That was...odd.
Click to expand...
On the flip side, I remember a starting GK that was moving to a new team, but wanted to honor the commitment to her current Hotspurs team by staying with the team until after State Cup. The family drove all the way to Lancaster, but the coach (Paolo Landini) did not let her play at all that weekend since he questioned her "commitment" to the team. I have always make sure to tell people about what happened when they ask about him.
 
Go for the experience. No one hates Lancaster more than me, but we always seemed to have a good time despite the 3 hour drive from San Diego. We stayed at the Hampton Inn on the north side of Lancaster next to the minor league baseball stadium. After the girls were done playing almost all of us walked across the street and watched the baseball game. The girls had a blast, ate too much junk food, and got a bunch of autographs from no-name baseball players.
 
Messi>CR7 said:
Below is what many softball teams do when they go to Lancaster for their version of the State Cup. Not sure why this never caught on in soccer, but something for your team to consider:
-The team rents a 12-people van and one or two parents drive all the kids the whole weekend (to and back from Lancaster, to and back from each game). It's a real road trip for the kids.
-Before the trip, the kids all get together and decorate the bus with chalks (with their names, jersey #, etc.)
-Other than the driver parents, you don't need to be there an hour ahead for the match. You just show up right before game time :)
-If you don't like the long drive to Lancaster, Metrolink station is nearby. You can take the train there and just Uber around town.

Good luck.
Click to expand...

It may sound like a great idea but it also a huge liability. Specially driving to Lancaster in February with 12 kids in the van.
 
outside! said:
On the flip side, I remember a starting GK that was moving to a new team, but wanted to honor the commitment to her current Hotspurs team by staying with the team until after State Cup. The family drove all the way to Lancaster, but the coach (Paolo Landini) did not let her play at all that weekend since he questioned her "commitment" to the team. I have always make sure to tell people about what happened when they ask about him.
Click to expand...

Wow that's some BS right there.
 
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