When to start private training?

At what age do you recommend starting private trainings/coaching for your kids if they’re serious about soccer? And if so, is it better in a group or solo?

We’re around parents from all spectrums - some who say they’ve never done anything formal beyond what their club provided, to kids as young as 7-8 training 6-7 days a week sometimes twice a day + other sports.

In both cases the kids are pretty darn good but it seems like it’s the ones who have been through it with their older kids that tend to lean towards not doing the privates for their youngers.. is this because they don’t see the value in it after going through it? Or maybe burned out because now it’s their 2nd, 3rd, 4th kid?

I’ve heard so many different things from some parents who are like, it basically comes down to genetics - if you have the right body type and speed, you’ll pretty much make it no matter what so long as you stick with it, to the outliers mentality of 10,000 hours will make you an elite player.

What do you think?
 
if your son/ DD really wants it and shows heart and willing to put the work in. you should start now. Put him/her to the challenge.
 
when they start nagging you to take them to do more than what they get at practice you will know. if they dont have a ball on their foot running around the house or back yard they dont want extra training. Dont turn it into a job. My 17 yo now puts in work every day on her terms. just my two pesos
 
if they dont have a ball on their foot running around the house or back yard they dont want extra training. Dont turn it into a job.

Saw a U7-ish girl in a tutu at a club practice recently. She was doing all her little ballet moves as the scrimmage went on around her. It was glorious. She was just doing her thing. And I give props to the parents and the coach that let her wear that tutu to practice!
 
At what age do you recommend starting private trainings/coaching for your kids if they’re serious about soccer? And if so, is it better in a group or solo?

We’re around parents from all spectrums - some who say they’ve never done anything formal beyond what their club provided, to kids as young as 7-8 training 6-7 days a week sometimes twice a day + other sports.

In both cases the kids are pretty darn good but it seems like it’s the ones who have been through it with their older kids that tend to lean towards not doing the privates for their youngers.. is this because they don’t see the value in it after going through it? Or maybe burned out because now it’s their 2nd, 3rd, 4th kid?

I’ve heard so many different things from some parents who are like, it basically comes down to genetics - if you have the right body type and speed, you’ll pretty much make it no matter what so long as you stick with it, to the outliers mentality of 10,000 hours will make you an elite player.

What do you think?

If only learning and development were a 1+1=2 equation, we'd have a production line of world class players! Unfortunately, it's non-linear and complex.

Yes, genetics play a part (whether you like it or not, it's a factor) but so does the environment that the individual is in. Let's take a kid who has lots of other activities and plays soccer only once or twice a week with no informal or unstructured games; they would likely benefit from private coaching. Now let's take a kid in an inner-city area, with little to no other outside activities except soccer (we'll say they play pickup and 'street' soccer most days along with a team also); they likely are in less need of private coaching. Did most of Brazil's soccer stars have private coaching? Almost certainly not.

In reference to your last paragraph; the best answer is somewhere in between. Genetics alone won't make anyone a good soccer player. Equally though, neither will 10,000 hours of practice if your genetics don't lend themselves to the intensity and speed/agility required to excel at soccer. That said, 10,000 hours of practice (if it is purposeful, deliberate practice) will get you pretty good at anything!

I coached here privately for a number of years before starting a club and I would always advise parents to do a combination of group and 1-to-1 training, if they had the time (and $ of course). Both have benefits (and drawbacks) and so a combo will help get the most of out of any kid in terms of technical improvement and decision making.

All of that taken into account, the ultimate driver is the kid. If they don't truly enjoy the game and actually want to do extra private training, it's probably best you don't push them into it. Some encouragement may be needed (interestingly, many elite athletes have said they were 'pushed' into additional training at some point in their childhood) but it cannot be forced.
 
I started last year when my son was 8, hes had a ball at his feet since he could walk, I asked my coach if he knew anyone and we were lucky enough that he recommend a place local to me in tustin. Best money I ever spent...
like someone said above, you see when the kid is ready, dont push it...
Stick with group training , its less expensive and your kid needs to still be surrounded by other kids, keeps it fun and keeps it competitive.
You can do privates here and there, but group ones especially with teammates and friends seem to be the ticket for us.
As a parent its your job to provide them a path, their job is to work hard and if their not into it stop immediately, that means their not having fun and your being pushy which WILL have negative outcomes.....
The best FREE PRIVATE TRAINING IS YOUTUBE, when your kids is watching YOUTUBE videos on soccer all day , make that jump....
good luck!!
 
All of that taken into account, the ultimate driver is the kid. If they don't truly enjoy the game and actually want to do extra private training, it's probably best you don't push them into it. Some encouragement may be needed (interestingly, many elite athletes have said they were 'pushed' into additional training at some point in their childhood) but it cannot be forced.

Thanks. My big concern is burnout - I saw a video on this forum the other day where I think it was some Australian coach who made a 2x2 that showed those who are successful with no talent/no committment, no talent but committed, talented but not committed, and both talented and committed. The study showed that the talented and committed are amazing but very rare, the talented but not committed usually drop out, and so you usually end up with a lot of less talented but committed players in the end with a few rare instances of truly talented and committed players.

I’m getting a bit deep here but it made me think about how true that is when you look at life in general. Few kids go out thinking to themselves they want to be uncommitted - they just end up losing interest - and my epiphany this morning was, maybe because they reached early success, it was no longer much of a challenge for them. They feel they’ve already learned all the skills in the book, they’re clearly better than all/most of their peers, and now they’re bored and want to look for the next challenge. Where as, the mediocre players still see the “carrot” and have that chip on their shoulder to keep pursuing and the need to prove themselves, they have the discipline and desire to finish the race.

In other words, my sense is, it’s like the tortoise and the hare. Even if your kid has talent, do they have to be the best player at age 8-11? Or is it more important that they continue progressing and learn a little more everyday so it stays interesting, they’re more likely to hunger for more, and gives them time to feel like they’ve had a chance to live life and explore other things.

I guess the question is, at what age do they really need to start fine tuning those skills if you want to have playing college soccer as an option? Right now my DD is good enough to get by at the current level she’s playing, she does practice on her own and is open to privates, loves watching soccer. but wondering if I should just hold off and let time take it’s course?
 
Thanks. My big concern is burnout - I saw a video on this forum the other day where I think it was some Australian coach who made a 2x2 that showed those who are successful with no talent/no committment, no talent but committed, talented but not committed, and both talented and committed. The study showed that the talented and committed are amazing but very rare, the talented but not committed usually drop out, and so you usually end up with a lot of less talented but committed players in the end with a few rare instances of truly talented and committed players.

I’m getting a bit deep here but it made me think about how true that is when you look at life in general. Few kids go out thinking to themselves they want to be uncommitted - they just end up losing interest - and my epiphany this morning was, maybe because they reached early success, it was no longer much of a challenge for them. They feel they’ve already learned all the skills in the book, they’re clearly better than all/most of their peers, and now they’re bored and want to look for the next challenge. Where as, the mediocre players still see the “carrot” and have that chip on their shoulder to keep pursuing and the need to prove themselves, they have the discipline and desire to finish the race.

In other words, my sense is, it’s like the tortoise and the hare. Even if your kid has talent, do they have to be the best player at age 8-11? Or is it more important that they continue progressing and learn a little more everyday so it stays interesting, they’re more likely to hunger for more, and gives them time to feel like they’ve had a chance to live life and explore other things.

I guess the question is, at what age do they really need to start fine tuning those skills if you want to have playing college soccer as an option? Right now my DD is good enough to get by at the current level she’s playing, she does practice on her own and is open to privates, loves watching soccer. but wondering if I should just hold off and let time take it’s course?

Great way of looking at it. No doubt the commitment/talent combo is rare and those are invariably the kids who make it at a high level. In fact, it’s safe to say without both of those things, you simply won’t make it to a high level as the competition will weed you out.

There is an element of kids being too comfortable and bored when they are the best and so they need to be in an environment where they are constantly challenged by coaches, teammates and opponents. The article below talks about this issue actually:

https://www.fcengland.com/news_article/show/910362?referrer_id=3861005

In terms of playing high level soccer (college for example), the sooner you start fine tuning skills, the better. Hundreds of thousands of other kids are fine tuning already; competition is tough at that standard. If your kid loves watching the game, that’s great. Not enough people realize how much can be learned from watching (and studying, not just casually watching) top level soccer teams and individuals play; you can pick up so much.

Always an individual decision with your kid as the driver. No harm in trying it and seeing if the desire and engagement is there.
 
There is an element of kids being too comfortable and bored when they are the best and so they need to be in an environment where they are constantly challenged by coaches, teammates and opponents.

This is where one of my kids falls.

They need the extra push and small group and 1 on 1 training that's pushing them harder then the club. The extra training is filling that missing gap left at practice.

Quite a few people here preach the small club approach and it's great to a point until your player out grows the current team and becomes bored at practice. The club has helped and bumped our player up another additional year but the tallent just lacks other then the kids are much bigger. (Size can always bring a new challenge to any sport)

Where I'm going with this is you need to gage your players situation individually. If they are being pushed mentally and physically at practice and games, privates may fry them out. If your kids left hurngy and looking for a challenge at any age it's always best to feed the beast to a certain age appropriate point.
 
Donno how old your kid is but it seems to me, based on most the posts thus far, that the whole thing is too focused on affecting the child, rather than the child's own initiative and let the kid affect the process.

Ultimately the are two key ingredients to success at any sports in my view. One, its the genetic lottery (it is what it is), and the other is desire. If one is lucky enough to have done well in the genetic lottery portion, then desire will determine the rest. Private lessons, is just a byproduct of wanting to improve. There is no burnout for those with desire.

You don't believe for moment that all those professional players that come from less than wealthy countries, developed by having their parents paying for privates and worrying about burnout do you?
 
You don't believe for moment that all those professional players that come from less than wealthy countries, developed by having their parents paying for privates and worrying about burnout do you?

We live in a very different environment than those other countries. There, kids have opportunities to play all-day, everyday and other kids to do it with anytime you want -so it’s a culture and that means there are plenty to learn from and plenty of opportunities to learn. Here, I can’t even find a field with an open goal that’s not locked up outside of some club or team training let alone just let her walk to the park for a pickup game.

Burnout can take different forms - my team Mgr has an older who was all about soccer, very talented and had a bright future. The parents are by no means the pressuring kind. He wanted to be a pro player, watched soccer all the time, always had a ball on his foot, etc... he was starting on the highest team at a fairly large club and then all of a sudden decided he didn’t want anything to do with soccer anymore. Nothing wrong with that, he just wasn’t interested anymore.

I know there’s no crystal ball. And nothing wrong with doing privates, but my observation has been that a lot of the parents I’ve spoken to who’s older kids are now being recruited or have had kids go play at top D1 schools, their youngers aren’t doing privates, they’re not sending them to camps, etc... until they’re near recruiting age. they’ll still go to the park and kick around, but keep it very light and limited to what the club provides. Maybe it’s cost, who knows... but to me it says something. They’re also usually the ones who are quiet on the sidelines except when cheering, aren’t “having the talk” on the way home, don’t sit and watch every practice, etc....
 
....he was starting on the highest team at a fairly large club and then all of a sudden decided he didn’t want anything to do with soccer anymore. Nothing wrong with that, he just wasn’t interested anymore.

I know there’s no crystal ball. And nothing wrong with doing privates, but my observation has been that a lot of the parents I’ve spoken to who’s older kids are now being recruited or have had kids go play at top D1 schools, their youngers aren’t doing privates,.........They’re also usually the ones who are quiet on the sidelines except when cheering, aren’t “having the talk” on the way home, don’t sit and watch every practice, etc....

Two things.

One, with all due respect, I would not equate quitting to burnout. There are plenty of other reasons, including that he may have realized its not worth the sacrifice to get to the next level, however good he was, as well as wasn't going to get to the pro level. I have seen many kids on high level teams, including older DA's quit once they realize about themselves.

The other, I do have our older son playing in college currently and one in HS. We talk about after game recaps but not from the perspective of you you're calling "the talk". Its almost impossible to generalize this subject because each player is different so are the situations.
 
They’re also usually the ones who are quiet on the sidelines except when cheering, aren’t “having the talk” on the way home, don’t sit and watch every practice, etc....

95% of the time its the quiet ones who are the worst. You see one thing in public but behind closed car doors its a different story.
 
My two cents.....first DO NOT use a trainer from the same club where your kid plays. The best trainers my daughter and many of her teammates have had were not even club coaches or coached at other clubs. The three best trainers she had were ex-pro (US National team and MLS) and college players who only did training. When my daughter was younger she would attend local camps during the summer and she was happy with that, learning and getting better. She started privates at 12 years old with two teammates because she asked me how she could get faster and improver her foot work. The trainer was a boys coach from another club who had played professionally and really pushed the three girls. At 13 she moved to one-on-one training with the ex-US National team player and stayed with her until 14 1/2 y/o to 15 y/o when the trainer began coaching club. We saw a lot of improvement in her game, so she wanted to continue training. She started training at Catalyst when she was 15 y/o and her skill, speed and agility really improved significantly. My DD, and I agree with her, says she Catalyst is the reason she had the skills to play in college and get a significant soccer scholarship. My daughter currently does training and actually goes out and watches the girls she trains play in games so she knows exactly what the player needs to work on. Her trainers at Catalyst did this and also contacted her club coaches to find out what they thought my daughter needed to work on.

Find a trainer that will really push your kid out of their comfort zone. If the trainer is not pushing your kid or you are not seeing improvement after four sessions than go find another trainer. Whatever you do, do not use your kid's club coach as their trainer. They need a completely different perspective and someone else to motivate them.
 
Whatever you do, do not use your kid's club coach as their trainer. They need a completely different perspective and someone else to motivate them.
If your goal is to improve, I agree with Surfref that you should
not use your club coach or any coach in your club (although we did use a past coach at one point because he was great and convenient.

Hiwever, if your goal is to buy a spot at eithe of the two girls DA clubs in the City of San Diego, be aware of the fact that your coaches prefer cash.
 
Back
Top