This goes out to all you parents who have been at this a lot lot longer than I (my daughter is a 2009). What advice do you have in terms of what to look for in a club and more importantly in a coach? In your honest opinion what matters most and what really doesn't at this age? What advice would you give to a younger you who was just starting the process like I? Just looking for some sage advice while trying to navigate the craziness this time of year brings at the club level...thanks in advance!!
If you could...
- Thread starter KONI
- Start date
BarcaLover
SILVER
Bitter at all?
coachrefparent
GOLD
I'm sure he's not looking for a professional club for his 8 year old.
zebrafish
SILVER ELITE
I think this is slightly cynical but sage advice.
99.9% of everyone who doesn't agree with this is varying levels of delusional, with the rest (0.1% or less) being parent of professional/semiprofessional/college player.
Looking for any and all advice about the journey specifically and generally....whatever speaks to people...
Soccerfan2
GOLD
Find a reputable, local club with a coach that actually knows soccer, will focus on player development (2009’s should play all positions and be allowed to make lots of mistakes) and is a good person. Coaches and teammates come and go every year or two, so no sense getting too crazy chasing all that around. Establish a relationship with your club.
Then practice with your kid a lot at home, especially on first touch. If your kid shows interest and ability to be very competitive amongst peers, find a great trainer.
Then practice with your kid a lot at home, especially on first touch. If your kid shows interest and ability to be very competitive amongst peers, find a great trainer.
Look for a coach who your daughter enjoys going to practice with. Look for a team that is welcoming to both your daughter and you. Go watch the coach during a game and just watch the coach and see how he behaves on the sideline. If this is going to be the people you surround your daughter and yourself with 3-4 days a week are you comfortable with that? Trust your gut on whether your family will be happy. After all that worry about how good the team is.
If you mean that at this age (2009), you're pretty much correct. But if you mean club soccer as a whole, then no.
As a parent of college player, I believe its an overstatement to say that 99.9% are delusional. Delusional from what? We all have different objectives. If you mean that 99.9% of parents that think their kid is going to be next Messi, then yes I agree. But if you mean that the competitive game teaches life lessons and qualities such as leadership, working together as a team and so on, then no.
I'm sure what you'd meant is closer to being the next phenom than life lessons, but I don't want anyone to think the whole thing is delusional endeavor.
Background, I have a kid playing soccer in college after playing club since U10 (AYSO before that since U6), and current U16 (2002) player also playing club since U10 - both boys.
Looking back, the best advise I can give you is to keep one eye on the future and your objectives for your kid, and the other eye on simply enjoying the moment. Whatever you think playing soccer is going to do for your kid, don't let that overwhelm your actions and logic at the expense of enjoying the moment and keeping it focused on what your kid wants to do (and not necessarily you). In other words, keep it real.
Here is the basic parent-child player roles.
Parents (bridge builder):
- open doors and provide resources
- general 50,000 ft level direction for your kid
- encourage and be realistic
Child Player (the driver):
- motivation and initiative to improve
- work ethics and integrity
- commitment and time management
What goes with those above will take pages so I won't but I think you've read enough comments from other to know that if your child display his/her part, you'll need to provide accordingly. That may mean privates, getting on the better team, travel to tournaments and camps and so on.
As for coaching, when young, like yours, focus on techniques/technical skills. Find a coach that's known for technical training (either team or private or both). Its order of magnitude easier to learn technical skills when younger than older. As the child gets older (12~13 yrs) start transitioning towards tactical knowledge coach. Focus placed on how the game is won and played. Position specific movements with and without the ball.
Nobody cares how many games your kid won at U10, 11, 12, much less how many goals scored or saved or any stats. It starts to matter thereafter for the teams because the record enable access to better, higher profile tournaments.
Last, puberty makes a huge difference and bring changes so be ready to audible and change course, if it takes you into unexpected direction. Even if the kid stops playing soccer, just remember its just a game and there are many other constructive outlet to engage your child into.
Enjoy the ride.....
I truly appreciate the time and effort taken in your post! Between a coach who is solely technical, one who is both technical and tactical, and one who primarily focuses of tactical....what would be your thoughts? I have heard some say tactical since technical can be worked on in privates...would love your 2 cents on this
This is tough unless the parent has played at least college of club level high school ball, or really throws themselves into coaching education. I've seen quite a few parents instruct their kid wrong (a little knowledge can be a dangerous thing), or have the kid be dishearted by the criticism on the ride back home. My own son (a GK age 9) has surpassed by my own level of knowledge now (I played GK into middle school). And by about age 9 too, many kids begin to push back on parenting (whether in homework, or in sports practice). If the parent can refrain from coaching and just go out and have some fun (giving the kid additional touches on the ball), that could be useful. The kid can also go out and bang against a wall or do Coever moves as well, but as others have pointed out, it's hard to keep their motivation going as such repetitive exercises can be boring. You can look for the much praised pickup games, though with free range kids now being rare they are hard to find, and sometimes wind up being more organized than intended.
As to tactical v. technical coaches, the US Soccer Curriculum leans heavily on guided self-learning. Coaches aren't supposed to be out there teaching individual players how to properly trap a ball. When I questioned the instructors on my own licensing exam about "where they learn those basics", I was told they are either expected to bring it into club with them, or that's what trainers are for.
I think until they are 12 the focus should be technique and love of the game. Keep them interested and engaged, encourage participation in other sports, avoid the trap the fall into the "year round culture". Find coaches who respect that you have a diverse and probably varied interest child!
When a foundation is laid for a true love of the game so much more falls into line. You have so much available online - tutorials, ideas, ball at feet ideas. The coach and club represent only a fraction of your experience. You and your daughter encompass the majority of it.
Once 12 hits the focus shifts but at that point you will know so don't overthink. I wish I could go back to my u10 self and say relax it's going to be perfect in a few years!
Keep perspective and trust your choices. No matter what her club or coach it will be you alone that is her main advocate and creates opportunities for her In the game. Don't forget that!
When a foundation is laid for a true love of the game so much more falls into line. You have so much available online - tutorials, ideas, ball at feet ideas. The coach and club represent only a fraction of your experience. You and your daughter encompass the majority of it.
Once 12 hits the focus shifts but at that point you will know so don't overthink. I wish I could go back to my u10 self and say relax it's going to be perfect in a few years!
Keep perspective and trust your choices. No matter what her club or coach it will be you alone that is her main advocate and creates opportunities for her In the game. Don't forget that!
Since you've asked, I would pick the coach that focuses on technical skills at your daughter's age.
Repetition is a key part of skills development and unless you're going to do privates multiple times a week, I would pick a technical coach.
My older kid used to juggle while he waited for his school carpool to arrive in the morning for 10~15 minutes. Just that alone improved his touch significantly.
Multi Sport
DA
The 10 minute rule:
Give yourself 10 minutes to discuss the game. If your DD wants to go longer then let her talk but make it light. This way your kid wont be dreading the drive home because they have to listen to an hour long lecture on what they did wrong.
Enjoy your ride... it really does go by in the blink of an eye.
Give yourself 10 minutes to discuss the game. If your DD wants to go longer then let her talk but make it light. This way your kid wont be dreading the drive home because they have to listen to an hour long lecture on what they did wrong.
Enjoy your ride... it really does go by in the blink of an eye.
oh canada
GOLD
Don't be a frequent reader or poster on these boards. Once a month at most! More than that? Then your kid's life has become yours.
Also, don't buy into the year-long club soccer commitment at your kid's age. Play futsal, indoor, rec, etc. (along with other sports/activities throughout the year..hockey eh?) then at 12+ consider dedicating many of your weekends and holidays to soccer if it's your daughter's #1 interest.
Even 5-6 years ago, the commitment levels required by club soccer were not as onerous. Think about it...they are more than any other youth sport in the U.S. And, for the smallest payoff for the few that do make it to the top. Even NHL players make a better buck than MLS.
Also, don't buy into the year-long club soccer commitment at your kid's age. Play futsal, indoor, rec, etc. (along with other sports/activities throughout the year..hockey eh?) then at 12+ consider dedicating many of your weekends and holidays to soccer if it's your daughter's #1 interest.
Even 5-6 years ago, the commitment levels required by club soccer were not as onerous. Think about it...they are more than any other youth sport in the U.S. And, for the smallest payoff for the few that do make it to the top. Even NHL players make a better buck than MLS.
Messi>CR7
GOLD
For the parents:
-Have the right perspective. I personally view this as a $2,000 hobby. I get way more enjoyment out of watching my DD play and improve, talking to her about soccer, and spending lone time together driving her to soccer, than I would've had from playing 20 rounds of golf. I can't think of a better activity that will allow me to regularly spend so much quality time with my DD before it's too late.
-Get educated on soccer yourself if you are not already. This will allow you to figure out if a particular coach is good or is the type of coach you're looking for. This will also eliminate some unnecessary heartaches often seen at at younger ages (e.g. unhappy that your DD playing more defense than offense, have a hear attack when you see DD play back to the goalie, etc).
-Have your DD train with the team for a few sessions and let her be part of the decision making. Which group of girls and coach does she like the best is probably the most important question at this age. If you only attend one session, the girls might be playing some type of fun games for most of the session without doing any skills training (quite typically for a team of 8 years old). You want to watch a few sessions to see a good balance of fun, technical training, and scrimmages.
-Look through the league game logs and find those clubs that tend to field a smaller roster. Some clubs field a very small roster for younger teams with minimum bench (e.g. 9 players for 7v7). Fewer players mean more playing time. Everyone is happy.
For the kids:
-Not much. 8 year olds mostly just want to play. Remove the parents and there is no drama
.
-Have the right perspective. I personally view this as a $2,000 hobby. I get way more enjoyment out of watching my DD play and improve, talking to her about soccer, and spending lone time together driving her to soccer, than I would've had from playing 20 rounds of golf. I can't think of a better activity that will allow me to regularly spend so much quality time with my DD before it's too late.
-Get educated on soccer yourself if you are not already. This will allow you to figure out if a particular coach is good or is the type of coach you're looking for. This will also eliminate some unnecessary heartaches often seen at at younger ages (e.g. unhappy that your DD playing more defense than offense, have a hear attack when you see DD play back to the goalie, etc).
-Have your DD train with the team for a few sessions and let her be part of the decision making. Which group of girls and coach does she like the best is probably the most important question at this age. If you only attend one session, the girls might be playing some type of fun games for most of the session without doing any skills training (quite typically for a team of 8 years old). You want to watch a few sessions to see a good balance of fun, technical training, and scrimmages.
-Look through the league game logs and find those clubs that tend to field a smaller roster. Some clubs field a very small roster for younger teams with minimum bench (e.g. 9 players for 7v7). Fewer players mean more playing time. Everyone is happy.
For the kids:
-Not much. 8 year olds mostly just want to play. Remove the parents and there is no drama
.
Simisoccerfan
PREMIER
Soccer needs to be fun. Keep her with her friends and a good coach until she is entering High School. Then if she is good move her to a major club. The major clubs have so many more connections and benefits that will help her make the transition to college ball. If she doesn't want to play in college, keep it about fun and friends.